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Irreplaceable | Kun
Pilot!Kun x Reader, soldier au
Word count: 1592 Genre: Fluff, action. Author: maari Warnings: mentions of military exercises and Kun being kind of angry bc that's hot Note: This is so short, I'm sorry 🥺 but it's my first story with him so I hope you like! Request: Could you please write something with Kun (WAYV/NCT) with him being a plane pilot? Idk, Top Gun Maverick vibes?
⪢ NCT Masterlist
Y/N adjusted her sunglasses better on her face while a smile played across her face, she saw her boyfriend looking for her on the beach and almost laughed when she saw him confused.
But she genuinely laughed when a much older woman approached him. Even from afar she could see the bad intentions of the woman who even caressed his arm.
Kun was already an extremely attractive man, with the air force uniform and the Ray Ban attracting everyone's eyes even more.
But she had no reason to be jealous, firstly because she knew he loved her, secondly because the scene was very funny.
She bit her lip to hold back a laughter as he politely walked away from the woman, saying something to her and looking around.
Y/N decided to help him, she came out from under the umbrella she was in and waved her hand to get her boyfriend's attention.
Not only did it work, but she also saw his relieved smile and without waiting he started walking towards her. As soon as he got close, Y/N threw herself into his lap, hugging his waist with her legs and his neck with her hands.
Kun smiled widely as he held her by her thighs.
“Are you laughing?” he asked in disbelief.
“Another fan approaching you?” She smiled evilly.
He shook his head.
“I love my job but going out in uniform has its downsides.”
It wasn't the first and probably wouldn't be the last time he was stopped by someone, whether to flirt or thank him for his service and effort.
"Oh really?" She looked him up and down. “I don’t see any disadvantages.”
She bit her bottom lip and Kun threw his head back, laughing.
“I'm going to start thinking you're only with me because of my uniform.” he said before touching their foreheads and placing a peck on her.
“That’s one of the reasons.” She caressed the back of his head, laughing.
Kun took the opportunity to go back under the umbrella and sat down on the sand with Y/N still in his lap, she then buried her head on his shoulder.
She wanted to make the most of what little time they had before he went back to base.
“Are you going to watch training today?” He asked, rubbing her back.
“I went last week.” she remembered. “Your commander is going to fight me, I’m not leaving the base.”
“I train better when you watch me.” He admitted, smirking.
She raised her head and looked at him, she wanted to bite his cheeks, which were turning pink, but she just squeezed them with her hands.
“If it’s for the good of the aeronautics then okay, I’ll go.” She moved closer to place a kiss on the tip of his nose.
“I will train with the new soldiers and we will have an international team to train with.” he began to speak, excitedly.
Y/N paid attention to what her boyfriend was saying, focused on the way he looked so happy as he shared it with her. She stroked his short hair.
She liked listening to him talk, the way his dimples appeared when he smiled made Y/N smile too.
They stayed on the beach for a while, before Y/N gave him a ride to the base. When they arrived hand in hand while Kun carried the suitcase in the other hand, they greeted the soldiers who passed by them and Kun turned to kiss her lips softly when he saw the commander ahead.
“See you in a bit, sweetheart.” he smiled and kissed her once more.
“Fly, my indomitable wing.”
Kun laughed and she watched him walk over to the commander, where he saluted.
Y/N had a silly smile on her lips and saw when the commander started walking towards her.
“Y/N, it’s good to see you again.” he greeted her and she quickly bowed.
“I say the same, Commander.”
“Come to watch the training again?”
“If I can, of course.”
He indicated for her to start walking and as soon as she did, he started walking beside her.
“You’re not supposed to.” She looked at him, scared. “But Kun trains much better when you’re at base, so I’ll allow it.”
She nodded and smiled restrainedly, following the commander to the communications room where they would have access to the aircraft's radios and built-in cameras.
Y/N was used to it, she already knew that aircraft 3 was his and focused on the camera, watching him put on his helmet. She couldn't contain her happiness at seeing him do what he loved so much.
She was anxious about training and missions, but she always believed him when he promised that he would return in one piece and well.
Kun was a responsible and committed soldier, he had a leadership spirit that infected others.
And even the training he took seriously, he prepared himself very well for the exercises. Flying was his life.
Y/N followed his career so much that she knew the basics of the exercises, if anyone walked in there would mistake her for someone on the team.
It was routine training so there wasn't much new, the training, the instructions were always the same.
However, when a soldier from the international team made a risky move with the airship, Y/N saw Kun's expression change.
He wasn't just serious, he was angry and she knew very well why, any kind of accident or something like that would be his responsibility, after all he was the team leader. And the foreign team was probably not paying attention to their safety.
Y/N frowned when she saw her boyfriend's airship perform a dangerous stunt and glared at the commander.
He didn't seem at all calm about it.
“Was he supposed to do that?” she asked quietly, seeing the commander shake his head.
“It’s getting a little too risky.” he said.
She tried not to show her concern, she trusted her boyfriend but she knew how he felt when a soldier from abroad didn't follow what was agreed and he felt obliged to show why they were following protocol.
She couldn't say that she hadn't felt her heart stop in her mouth every time his airship spiraled in the air or when it got too close to the other ones, both his own team and the other.
She only felt a little calmer when the exercise was over and the airship began to turn around to land at the base.
Y/N left the room along with the commander and the rest of the team monitoring the exercise, a little further back as she heard the noise of the airship getting closer and closer, ready to return to the ground once again.
When this happened, she was already outside and saw the soldiers leaving one by one and recognized her boyfriend from afar, holding his helmet.
She stiffened and hurried forward when she saw Kun quickly walk over to another soldier, holding him by the collar of his uniform after dropping his helmet on the ground.
Y/N's eyes widened when she saw her boyfriend glowering with hatred while shaking his colleague.
“Listen, Simpson, if you do that again in my territory…” the other soldiers also approached to push the two away. “I swear I will shoot down your aircraft in the air.”
“Stop being nervous, Qian. It was part of the protocol.”
“Part of protocol to almost rip off the left wing of my airship?!” he questioned irritably and shook the soldier once again, who simply laughed ironically.
“That’s enough, you two!” The commander ordered and the two walked away. “Get out of my yard before I make you two load the fuel for all the aircraft.”
The two looked at each other irritated and left in opposite directions after saluting their superior.
Y/N observed the scene a little further back seriously and with her arms crossed, her boyfriend walked towards her while his face softened when he saw her there.
"My angel." he said as soon as he was close enough to stretch his arms out to her.
However, before she threw herself into his arms, Y/N threw a stinging slap at his arm which he dodged, complaining.
"Ouch! What was this?" he asked, confused.
“You scared me, you know?” she complained. “My leg went wobbly three times thinking you were going to fall with that thing from the sky!”
He laughed softly and approached her, hugging her around the waist.
“I knew what I was doing.”
She continued to stare at him, angry.
“I will never see your training again, it’s decided.”
"You sure?" He asked, raising his eyebrows and she narrowed her eyes. “I didn’t fall because I knew you were waiting for me.”
“Shhh.” she brought her cold hand to his mouth, shushing him. “Don’t even say that as a joke.”
He moved closer to place a kiss on the top of her head.
“I would never leave you!” he said and she suppressed her silly smile.
“You better!" She pouted. “You look too handsome in uniform and fighting with someone for me to lose.”
He pretended to be offended.
“Ah, so that’s all there is to it?”
She smiled mischievously and brought her hand to the back of his head.
“Of course not, you fool.” she caressed his skin, watching him close his eyes at the affection. “You are unbearable but you are irreplaceable.”
“I’ll show you what’s unbearable at home.”
#kun imagines#kun fluff#kun x reader#qian kun imagines#qian kun scenarios#nct scenario#nct scenarios#nct imagines#nct imagine#kpop imagines#kpop scenarios#nct fluff#nct x y/n#nct x you#nct x reader#kpop fanfic#kpop x y/n#kpop x you#kpop x reader#requests#maari#wayv scenarios#wayv imagines#wayv fluff#wayv fanfic#wayv x reader#wayv x you
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backburner // q.k
kun x reader
"hey, i want that"
i told him while pointing at the lonely chips bag lying flat in the shelf on front of me.
it seems like people did not bother to buy it today, i don't know if it's because they don't like the flavor or it's just gonna expire soon.
either way, i'll take it home 'cause I pity it. like how i should be for myself.
"take it if you want it, i'll pay for it anyway" he mumbled the last part, and I chuckled.
and then suddenly i jumped on his back and wrapped my arms around his neck.
"you serious?" i asked as I squished my cheek onto his.
"get off me" he said while quietly laughing, pushing me off his back, conscious that the few customers there could see us like that.
so I granted his wish and hopped down. i'm still smiling.
"yeah, i'm serious, just take what you want..." he said while continuing to roam around the aisles.
and so i got what i want...
"how about you? are you going to get something?"
"i'm good with this" he lifted the coca-cola can in his right hand.
We walked towards the sleepy cashier near the exit, suddenly jolting up when he heard the sound of the can landing on the marbled counter.
then i started staring at his face while he fishes for his brown wallet in his jeans' pocket.
and i stared.
and i stared.
and i stared.
"hey, let's leave now" kun snapped his fingers on front me, stopping me from staring at him too much.
he's used to it. i'm used to it. so it doesn't really matter i guess...
he was about to lead me out of the store, carrying the paper bag, when suddenly raindrops started pouring.
"shit, let's just stay here for a while..." he told me, pushing me gently back inside the store.
i said nothing as I went back to looking at his face.
"you know, your staring won't change anything between us..." he finally looked at me, then looked out the glass window walls to see if the rain finally stops.
"i'm sorry i can't help it, it just gets worse everytime i'm with you..." i mumbled the last part.
suddenly, the floor is so pretty to look at.
i felt that he looked at me again, taking a long pause before saying the next brutal words for me.
"you know i'll never be in love with you, right?"
shit. uhh, that hurts. like really fucking hurts.
i nodded in agreement.
"i hate that you keep torturing yourself for this..." he said to me. pitying me for what i am to him
"no, don't be...I...I'm just hoping that we w-would continue being friends like, this..I" a tear accidentally came out of my eye as I tried to explain it to him.
he stood there in silence.
"I just still want to be someone you can lean on to, even if you don't really like me back or anything, no, I...just want to be your friend..."
now i can't stop my tears from coming out. i'm glad that the cashier finally gave in and slept so he wouldn't hear me sobbing at the corner because of the man right beside me.
i can't really look at him straight in the eyes because he's going to hurt me more, so my eyes just wandered everywhere around the store, avoiding his..face.
i know that kun doesn't really know how to react to this, to me.
so he just pulled me by the hand to keep me close to him, my left cheek on his chest as he rubbed up and down my back to calm me down from crying.
my hands gave in to him, and weakly held onto the hem of his shirt to keep him close to me even more.
and it helped me calm down, but the pain of it was still lingering inside me...
and i'm already okay with that.
now playing: backburner by niki
#wayv au#wayv kun#qian kun#qian kun imagines#qian kun scenarios#qian kun smut#nct smut#qian kun angst#wayv#nct kun#nct#nct angst#wayv imagines#wayv angst#wayv fluff#nct imagines#nct fluff#kun smut#kun angst#kun imagines#kun fluff#kun scenarios#Spotify
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oh i'm looking for affection.
pairing: qian kun x reader
length: 1.07k words
synopsis: kun is just hopelessly in love with you.
tags: alternative universe, one-sided pining au, road trip, friend!kun, implied rejection, one-sided attraction, fluff
warnings: none.
the sound of the car engine is now blowing up kun's ears, completely remembering that he was at the backseat while ten was at the front, driving his car.
of course, he recalled losing in a bet with ten that resulted in lending his car to ten for the rest of the week. he wasn't afraid because of the thought of ten crashing his car, ten knew the consequences after all.
for ten's last day of borrowing kun's one and only car, he suggested that kun should come to the road trip together with their other friends. kun asked if you were coming the night before the day of the plan as you responded happily during your call with him.
on the day of the road trip, everybody packed their essentials and valuable stuff in their bags as kun placed each of the heavy objects inside the truck, keeping it neat and tidy. you and yangyang were obviously inside the car, playing with your phones to buy time while kun talked to ten outside, setting up the map and destination of the place you were all going.
kun sneaked a good amount of glances towards your direction through the tinted windows of the car, silently watching you scrolling through your phone feeling bored. then his eyes fixed back at ten, who kind of knew what was going on.
“oh? am i smelling love in the air?” a hint of tease displayed in his voice while he tried nudging the older’s elbow. kun was used to this, and he wasn't gonna show reaction and give in.
“i have no idea what you're talking about.”
“oh, come on.” he dramatically sighed, tired of kun trying to act like nothing's going on. ten could read him like an open book and there was no way he could escape him when he knew something.
eventually, both of them get inside the car. since yangyang was in the passenger's seat, he had no choice but to walk around and get in the backseat with you. it got a bit awkward when he was finally seated next to you, so he tried to lift up the mood, waving at you.
“hey.”
“you’re here!” you beamed, taking one of your earphones off.
kun was taken aback when you reached the other piece of the earphones to him, he was about to reject the offer but the bud was already in his ear as the sound of classical music burst into his ear.
kun knew that you knew about his love for classical music, remembering back in the day where he played a lot of pieces on the piano for his performance at some event during his time in university. but he loved playing tchaikovsky's swan lake to you when you were alone together, and that made you love classical music more.
“it's gonna be a long ride,” ten broke the silence before the engine of the car started. “so you might need to sleep for a while, me and kun will be looking out for possible stops for us to eat, ‘kay?”
“aye aye!”
the sky was soon painted into a gradient of blue-orange while the gleaming sun set into the horizon. kun couldn’t seem to sleep after taking a short nap, and he had been helping ten at their directions to get to a nearby stop where they could fill their stomachs.
just as he was about to lean forward to take the phone in his hands to check the GPS, he was halted by a thud and a heavy weight on his shoulder. turning his head to the side, he found your sleeping figure leaning on him.
in the rearview, he could see the smirk of ten, following the sound of the never-ending teasing. kun tried his best to ignore him and his dumb words, but the words seemed to weigh over his mind. it's been a long time since he had feelings for you and he could still recall the night he took you to the rooftop of his apartment to look up at the stars.
he recalled that night when he expressed his fondness over you. although you didn’t give him the answer he expected, he never stopped being friends with you. usually friendships last when one gets rejected by the other. to kun, it was dumb and stupid if he would be immature about the rejection, so he didn’t try to distance himself away from you.
kun was still that caring friend whenever you got to be with him.
he looked at you with that same fondness in his eyes as you leaned more, thinking that he was a pillow. “after all these years, you’re still in love with the same person.” ten broke the silence again. his words were more of a whisper to prevent disrupting you and yangyang’s sleep.
“i can’t help it, how could i not like such a lovely and wonderful person?” kun admitted, his hands ghostly extending over yours, then immediately retracted.
when they realized that it was already dark and they could see a nearby stop to get down to, ten finally pulled over to slowly park the car along with the other parked cars. “wake up everyone, we’re here to stop by and eat dinner.” ten loudly began, his fingers reaching over to yangyang as he shook him by the shoulder.
kun on the other hand, does his best in waking you up with his soft grip around your hands, gently shaking it. “hey, sleepyhead.”
his voice filled your ears while you tried fluttering your eyes open. when you realized that you were inches away from his face from all the leaning, you shifted in your seat to fix your position. “oh god, i’m so sorry. was i squishing you?” only a laugh left kun’s lips before shaking his head. “no, but i think you mistook me for a pillow when you were sleeping.”
he could already see hues of red and pink emerging from your cheeks, burning up at the words. your flushed face made him smile even more, “did i drool?”
“don’t worry, you didn’t.” rest assured, a sigh left your lips in relief.
“we stopped by to eat, you coming?” kun added, moving to the side to open the door of the car. he looked back, waiting for you before you set a smile on your face, moving towards him. “yeah, i'm coming.”
©MEIIDERYZ 2023. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
#wayv#wayv fanfic#wayv imagines#wayv fluff#wayv x reader#wayv scenarios#wayv drabbles#wayv au#kun#kun fanfic#kun imagines#kun fluff#kun x reader#kun scenarios#kun drabbles#qian kun#qian kun imagines#wayv kun#nct kun#nct fanfic#nct imagines#nct fluff#nct scenarios#nct au#nct x reader
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Naurrr, i wanna read the next chapter. Im enjoying it so far♡♡♡
⇢ word count: 19.1k ⇢ warnings: past unethical experimentation, brief blood and gore descriptions (some human and some non-human), you have to accept the premise of a single human empire in space in the future with colonies and a military and not think deeper about that, needle/injection mention ⇢ genre: sci-fi, set in the near-ish future, humans and aliens and robots, black op mission, captain kun, ?????? reader, slow burn, fluff, dash of angst, ft. wayv as the crew of the vision ⇢ extra info: took a lot of obvious inspo for this one from isaac asimov’s robot stories, specifically his concept of positronic brains & the three laws of robotics (and if you’ve read any of his stories, you’ll probably be able to see some other places too) ⇢ author’s note: ahhh she’s finally here! i hope you guys are as excited for part one as i am!! ⇢ series masterlist | next
Frankenstein complex (noun) ── The fear of mechanical men.
The air smelled like blood, burned electrical components, and whatever horrible odor came from blood getting onto electrical components as they sparked. All the blood wasn’t human, you could tell that, too. Skipper blood always stung your nose like rubbing alcohol. It was pitch black in the space you were hiding in, or maybe it was just nighttime. You should be scared, but your heart wasn’t beating fast for some reason.
Two pairs of heavy footfalls. One was heavier than the other. Walking, so definitely not Skippers. Both were still too light to be heavier races.
They slowed to a stop outside your hiding spot, and you really hoped they couldn’t read the Outspacer controls that would open the otherwise impossible-to-see door. After all, it was a language that had been dead for hundreds of millions of years, there was no way—
“Hey, Zennie, you got a read on these?” A man’s voice came from nearby, muffled by both the wall and presumably a helmet as well. Human, or related species.
You couldn’t hear this ‘Zennie’s reply, as it most likely came through the comms in his helmet, but you could hear the man’s side of the conversation.
“Oh, of course, how dare I, a mere meatsack, doubt your high-and-mighty artificial intelligence,” he replied with fake deference. “Yeah, yeah, I know that’s not what you meant. Alright, so just tell me which one’s the self-destruct button so I don’t press it?”
“Move, Wong, before you blow us up.” Another voice interjected. “ZEN? You said it’s a passageway? Oh, safe shelter. Bit different, don’t you think? Mind translating the dead language right the first time?”
He paused as he probably listened to Zen’s reply, then continued, “So? You know which one’s the open button?”
You couldn’t go anywhere. The hideout you were in was designed to hold only a few people for weather emergencies, to be structurally sound; not to have a back door in case you needed to escape intruders. You just had to hope Zen was completely wrong and they wouldn’t get it open.
Click.
There goes that.
The door dematerialized, and the rancid smell from before became even stronger. A man peered in barrel-first, and you recoiled back from the sudden light flooding your vision. You couldn’t press yourself any further back into the corner, but you still turned your head away to shield your sensitive eyes.
It only took a couple strides for one of the men to reach you, the other stayed back in the hallway, keeping his rifle fixed on you. The man stood over where you were sitting on the floor—your legs had gotten tired of standing after so long—and lowered his gun slightly so you could see the entirety of the front plate that covered his face. It was a reflective shield that gave you no clue to who was behind it, only let you see a warped, thinned and stretched version of yourself cowering in a corner. His armor was an improved version of the standard issue United Human Navy, if the insignia on both of his shoulders didn’t make that clear enough. It looked the same as the standard issue, but the heft of his footsteps had belied a weight difference that wasn’t explained by his stature or build, so it must be the grade of material.
“Are you hurt?” His voice came through an external speaker on his helmet. He was speaking in standard human. You couldn’t detect any sort of odd stiltedness or lag that sometimes happened with computer-assisted translations. He was assuming you understood standard human, and you did.
“No,” you replied, slowly uncrossing your arms to show your hands first, that you didn’t have anything hidden in them to attack him with. You still weren’t scared, for some reason.
“Oh, she’s pretty,” his companion commented from the hallway. The two of them must be sharing helmet feeds, as the one in front of you was definitely blocking most of you from his sight.
“Wong, shut it.” The outer speaker had been turned off for that, but it was still pretty clear to you.
“Sir, yes sir.”
“Can you stand?” His weapon was still at the ready, his finger resting above the trigger.
You couldn’t remember the last time you’d wiggled your fingers and toes, and it felt good to do it. “Yes.”
He stepped back, the unexpressive mirror of his face shield watching as you pushed up from your half-sit half-crouch, bracing yourself against the wall. Your body instinctively took a deep breath to try to recover from the sudden exertion, but the vaporized Skipper blood burned your entire respiratory tract, and you coughed and spluttered trying to force it back out, catching yourself on the wall on your forearms to stay upright. The odor made your head swim, your eyes water, and your chest hurt like someone had put gasoline in your lungs and struck a match.
“Okay, woah, woah.” Two gloved hands were on your arms and back, helping you stay up. His voice was muffled again as he switched to his in-helmet comms, “Xiao, get over here! We’ve got a survivor! Yes, really, just look at my stream.”
Then, his voice was projecting to you once more, “Breathe, breathe.”
You felt the roughness of a thumb wiping at the tears running down your cheeks, the durable material of his glove scratching against your skin. He grabbed the front of your shirt collar, pulling it up towards your face at the same time he firmly pulled your hand down that had been covering your mouth as you wheezed. Positioning the material over your nose and mouth into a makeshift filter of some sort, he continued holding it there for you as you took a few breaths.
“Better?”
You nodded shallowly. The smell of Skipper blood still cloyed to your throat and lungs, but the shirt helped keep more from entering.
More footsteps from down the hall, then another pair entered the shelter.
“Holy shit…” Someone breathed out.
“I know, man,” the voice that you were already pretty sure was ‘Wong’ from earlier replied.
“How long has she been in here?” A fourth voice asked, belonging to the footsteps getting closer to you.
“I don’t know,” the man already with you answered. “Wong and I just found her while clearing this sector.”
“Okay, well, you mind, Captain?” He said indicatively. “Can’t examine my patient through you.”
“You got it?” The captain asked you, shaking the collar slightly.
You took it from him, holding it over the bridge of your nose yourself as he had been doing for you before. Looking into his face shield where you were pretty sure his eyes should be, you nodded firmly this time.
He didn’t step back until you felt another pair of gloves grabbing your elbows where he had been. The newcomer’s uniform differed from the others’ in one way, he had a neon green rectangular patch on his right arm below his UHN insignia, as well as a few other places—intergalactic signal for medic. It was removable for the wearer’s own safety, and his in particular was slightly askew, as if he’d just slapped it back on in a hurry.
The medic flipped through the pockets of a pack strapped to his thigh before pulling out a small disc of clear plastic and pushing that against your hand. “Here, this’ll work a lot better than your shirt.”
You accepted it, and he helped you orient it the right way over your nose and mouth. It was apparently a mask or rebreather of some sort. It wasn’t exceptionally bulky, and you could feel that there was some sort of fine mesh material on the inside. Immediately, you could tell the difference. The air coming into your lungs carried only the slightest tinge of lingering burning electronics smell, and while you could tell that there was Skipper blood, it didn’t burn, or make your head spin. It was just unpleasant.
“There. How’s that?”
You gave him a thumbs-up, the standard human gesture for good, since they all seemed to speak standard human. The mask didn’t allow much room for talking.
“Alright, good. Are you injured?”
You shook your head.
“Do you feel pain anywhere?”
You shook your head again.
“Good, good. I have more questions, but we should get somewhere you can breathe. Give me a second.” He looked upwards as if talking to the heavens, and his outer speaker turned off. “Liu? Professor? Did you finish clearing the building? Alright, ZEN, got readings on air quality for her?”
After a pause, both the medic, Xiao, and the captain, who had been hovering behind him the whole time, nodded.
“Thanks, ZEN.” Xiao’s speaker turned on, “Here, our teammates found somewhere that you can breathe. It’s going to be a little bit of a walk, though. Is that okay?”
You nodded. Your legs would just have to deal.
“It’s not pretty out here…” The only one that hadn’t been identified to you in passing called out as a warning from his position in the hallway with ‘Wong.’
You turned around and pushed off the wall as your answer.
Stepping into the hall, you knew why you had smelled that particular concoction of smells. Just off to your left were two dead Skippers, their uniquely-articulated hind limbs that gave them their distinct gait—and consequently, the questionably flattering nickname from humans—stuck out at awkward angles now. Dark purple sludge seeped out from under their armor, Skipper blood. On the outside of the armor were smears, streaks, and splatters turned a gleaming ruby red under the emergency lights, human blood.
You couldn’t see any dead humans, or pieces of them, in this corner, but you remembered what the captain had called you. A survivor. Which meant there were others who didn’t survive.
“Come on.” It was the captain who ushered you the other direction from the Skipper bodies. “This way.”
Their helmets must have been mapping out the facility as the unit cleared it and displaying a route in all of their HUDs, because the four of them moved as if they knew the building like the back of their hand. The captain and Xiao flanked you on either side, with Wong at the front and the fourth unnamed one at the rear. You couldn’t tell if it felt more like a protection detail or a prisoner transport.
You kept your eyes on your feet not only so you didn’t have to see all of the mutilation, or to keep from stepping in something, but to avoid the unsettling, cold dread slowly sinking over you when from the moment you caught a look at the first dead human you passed by with her remarkably in-tact face, dandelion yellow blouse and lab coat, and realized you didn’t recognize her. When you inhaled sharply and shot your eyes down to your feet, you could tell that the captain noticed. He turned his head just ever so slightly towards you, off of the consistent path it had been before, and he paused, then went back to keeping watch.
They weren’t kidding when they said it was a bit of a walk. You could feel the muscles in your legs get sore, then start twitching, then start shaking, but you didn’t even consider asking to stop.
“Woah, Liu, slow down!” The captain ordered into his headset. “Okay, yeah, I see it. Don’t touch anything. We’re just sweeping right now, remember?”
“Great, the kid’s found more toys,” the one behind you snorted.
Xiao and Wong suddenly erupted into more laughter than that statement warranted you were pretty sure.
Wong then informed him with a snicker, “Mic’s on, Ten.”
“You say that as if I wouldn’t have said that to his face, too,” the one now finally identified as Ten retorted.
“ZEN, the mics, please?” The captain sighed. “Thank you.”
“Now he’s going to whine that we were shit talking him behind his back,” Xiao groaned. “Again.”
“Well we are,” Ten laughed.
“If he just stopped acting like a baby, Captain here wouldn’t have to step in and put him in time out all the time,” Wong clicked his tongue.
“You think he’s the one in time out right now?” The captain replied dryly.
You couldn’t help but let out a small chuckle into your mask, trying to cover it up with a cough when all four of their reflective shields whipped around to face you, as if they’d forgotten you were there. After an uncomfortable stretch of silence, they all shifted back into their watchful stances.
The captain suddenly spoke again, “Yes, Professor? Okay, sure… ZEN, put that on everyone’s HUDs.”
The lack of commentary from any of them for seemingly several minutes was startling, and you weren’t sure if you wanted to know what this ‘Professor’ was showing them.
“We’re going to have to go back there after dropping Xiao and her off, aren’t we?” Wong was the first to speak.
“Don’t ask questions you don’t want the answers to,” Ten sighed.
“Or already know the answer to,” the captain said. “If she has any wounds that Xiao needs to tend to, one of you will stay to keep guard. If not, it’ll be Ten and Wong with me to meet up with Liu and the Professor, and Xiao will stay with her.”
“Alright, Ten,” Wong rolled out his neck. “Rock paper scissors?”
“Almost there,” Wong called out from ahead of you. Your internal clock told you it was almost half an hour since they found you.
“It’s just through those doors,” the captain informed you, indicating to the double doors on the opposite side of the large atrium you were in. This area had been mostly untouched by the carnage, it seemed.
“The building does have Gecks, but none of those seemed to have made it out in one piece,” Xiao added, explaining why you hadn’t used the small four-seater all-terrain vehicles, parts of which you had occasionally seen strewn about. “Sorry.”
You shrugged one shoulder at him in what you hoped he could interpret as an understanding gesture, as you were pretty sure this wasn’t their fault. From the context that you were trying to gather very quickly, they had only just gotten here.
Wong pushed one of the doors open, and the captain went in right behind to do a quick sweep, shouting out a short ‘clear!’ before Xiao led you in, and Ten followed in last, Wong shutting it firmly behind him.
You had emerged into something that looked impossible. An entire world bigger than the building you were in before, but definitely contained in one room, as when you turned around, you could still find the door. Ahead of you were rolling hills of vibrant crops, and your hand fell from your face, taking the rebreather with it. The air in here was fresh and crisp, and of course it was, this was the ag bubble. It must have remained untouched from the conflict outside because it was completely self-sustaining, needing no human intervention to planet, grow, or maintain the crops, so there would have been nobody in here in the first place.
“Okay, I’ll ask again: Any pain?” Xiao questioned you, taking his gloves off, and revealing rather delicate hands for a military medic. He motioned like he was about to grab your arm. “Can I?”
You nodded, holding it out for him to lift and turn your limb to visibly inspect it as you verbally answered his first question. “No, no pain, no injuries, I swear. I mean, my legs are a bit sore from walking, but that’s it.”
He let it hang back down at your side before doing the same to the other arm. “Hit your head?”
“Uh, I don’t think so?” You bent your head to let him quickly feel at your scalp through your hair for any bumps, lacerations, or other evidence of injury.
“Have all your toes?”
“Haven’t counted lately…?”
“Do it now.”
And so everybody stood around while you awkwardly took your shoes and socks off to make sure you had all ten toes, and that they weren’t necrotic, then you finally sat down to pull your socks and shoes back on. Xiao took your pulse manually at your wrist, before having you breathe into a small device and sampling a pinprick of blood from your finger with the same tool. After a moment, the screen lit up green, along with your specific readings.
“Satisfied, Xiao?” The captain asked.
“Absolutely,” the medic nodded. “More compliant than all of my patients as of late.”
“Good. We’re going to head out to catch up with the others and check that out.”
“Better you than me.”
“Hold on guys, aren’t we forgetting something?” Wong stopped the other two from leaving.
Ten and the captain looked at each other, then back to Wong.
“What, Wong? And we’re not guessing, spit it out or shut up,” the captain demanded, crossing his arms over his chest.
Wong reached up and pulled his helmet off in one grand motion, the first of any of them to have done so. He shook his dark, shaggy hair out—you wondered if that length was perhaps a bit too long for UHN standards, as it was almost covering his ears—before focusing a wide grin on you. Wong crouched down in front of you.
“Do angels have names?”
The other three groaned and swore at varying volumes.
You stared at him blankly, unsure of why this was receiving such backlash from the others, and why they all also seemed to be waiting for your response. When it had quieted down a little bit, you cleared your throat, and answered hesitantly, “I-I don’t know. Do they? I’m sorry, I’m not a theologist… I don’t think I even believe in the divine, really.”
Wong’s jaw dropped as he stared at you, and Ten and Xiao began howling with laughter. The captain marched over, cuffing him by the ear. “That’s enough. Get up! Stop harassing the woman.”
“Ow! That hurt!” Wong cradled the side of his head as he pulled himself to his feet.
“Should’ve kept your helmet on.” The captain yanked Wong away by his scruff as the soldier struggled to put his gear back on. “Do it again and I’m throwing you out of the Vision into the next star. Understand me, Corporal?”
“Zennie! Not helpful, dude! I don’t think that was him asking how close the closest star was!” Wong yelped.
Wong, Ten, and the captain disappeared through the door, and you could no longer hear them, but judging by Xiao’s chuckling, they were still going at it, and it was apparently funny. You looked up at the one remaining soldier you were left with inquisitively.
“Oh, sorry, here.” Xiao popped his helmet off as well, and you got to see his sharp features for the first time. He set it on the ground at his feet, and you noted that he pointed the face shield away from you. “I’m Xiao Dejun. You can just call me Dejun, if you’d like.”
“Don’t you need to hear your teammates?” You asked hesitantly, looking at the helmet.
“Earpiece,” he tapped a small device nestled in his left ear. “There are some advantages to not having the neural port. Like not having an AI inside of my goddamn brain.”
“You also don’t have a rifle,” you observed for the first time. Before, you had presumed that it was merely slung over his back, but now you could clearly see that the bulk there was more packs of medical supplies.
“I’m a terrible shot, barely got past basic. I’d just make more patients if I had one,” he laughed, then patted a holster on his right thigh. “Captain makes me carry a pistol, though.”
You looked off towards a rippling field of grain nearby, trying not to think of that woman’s face, her yellow blouse, because then you’d think about why you didn’t know her. She was in a lab coat, this was some kind of scientific facility, you were sure of it, you knew that, so why didn’t you know her—
“Sorry about Wong, by the way,” Dejun very thankfully caught your attention again, offering you your second smile of the day. “I promise, he wasn’t trying to be greasy. He’s a goofball, he was trying to make you laugh, put you at ease, you know? But clearly, that wasn’t the way to do it. So again, sorry.”
“He wasn’t asking a theological question?” You clarified.
He tilted his head, giving you a strange, bemused look. “No, he was asking what your name is. It’s an old, cheesy Earth pickup line. Or, I guess it must be unique to Earth, since you don’t know it. Are you from a colony or…?”
“I… don’t know,” you trailed off, the corners of your mouth turning down as you tried to think harder.
“You don’t know your name? Or if you’re from a colony?”
“My name’s Y/N.” You could answer that immediately. That was familiar, yours.
“So you don’t remember if you’re from Earth or a colony?”
You squeezed your eyes shut as you tried to think harder, but it felt like you were just scrambling in a dark, empty room. “No, I don’t know.”
“Hey, that’s okay. Relax, Y/N,” he said gently. “Just relax right now, okay?”
Dejun took one of the packs off his back and started rooting through it. “How long were you in there? I’m sure you’re thirsty, and hungry.”
“I don’t know…”
His brow furrowed as he offered a canteen out to you. “Here. Water.”
“Thank you.”
Slowly, the man with you lowered himself down until he was sitting across from you, linking his fingers together. He let you open the bottle and take a few deep gulps of water. You couldn’t remember the last time you had water, but it felt great to drink it again.
“Y/N…” The medic said calmly. “What is the first thing you can remember? The oldest hard memory you have?”
You wiped away a stray drop that had rolled down your chin, and scraped through your brain, but came up startlingly empty. “I-I guess smelling blood, all the human blood and Skipper blood, and then hearing footsteps outside where I was hiding. Wong’s and the captain’s, right before they found me.”
His eyes went wide, and his nostrils flared as his features turned serious. “Your oldest memory is less than an hour old?”
That same unsettling, cold dread that had started sinking down over you since you saw the woman fully coated you, and you involuntarily shivered. Cautiously, hesitantly, as if afraid that you were erring somehow, you nodded. “I take back what I said earlier, Dejun. I think there’s something very, very wrong with me.”
Dejun asked you round after round of questions walking through the very first thing you could remember right up to that very second, until he let out a long sigh.
“Well, so far it seems like you’re forming memories right now just fine,” he declared. “And you at least remember your name, which is good.”
“I knew you guys were UHN, and that you were a medic because of your green patch,” you reiterated insistently, feeling like you were going in circles with your own mind. How could you possibly know about the United Human Navy and military visual codes but not if you were from Earth or not?
“Okay, so you’ve been around the Navy before. If you were at this place, that makes sense. You don’t have a neural port, so you were probably a military contractor of some sort.”
You immediately latched onto this clue. “What is this place?”
Dejun offered you a regretful look. “Already said too much. That’s a question for the captain, sorry.”
You sighed, but didn’t push him. Pointing to the exit, you tried another avenue of your apparent knowledge. “I know those aliens are called Skippers.”
“Definitely UHN with that lingo.” Dejun grinned at you. “One of us.”
“But I don’t know why they were here. Or why I’m here.”
“Don’t push yourself.”
“And I know that this place is an agriculture bubble, ag bubble for short, and what that is, and the basics of how and why it works, and what it’s for, but not why it would be here. Or why I would be here—ow!” You held the front of your head as a dull pressure started up from the inside.
“Y/N?” Dejun scrambled closer, his voice concerned. “What’s going on?”
“My head hurts,” you scrunched your nose up against the feeling.
“Where? Describe it for me. Is it a throbbing? Stabbing? Shooting? Aching? Squeezing?”
“The front mostly. Feels like something’s pushing from the inside out, kind of,” you explained, dropping your hand to let him do another, more thorough examination for any head injuries.
“A pressure?”
“Yeah.”
“You’ve got to take it easy,” he told you frankly. “The human brain’s a finnicky, unpredictable thing. And I’m just talking about the squishy part inside your skull. Interrogating it about why you can remember some things and why you can’t remember other things isn’t going to make you remember those things. I can’t see any injury on the outside, but since you can’t remember whether or not you were injured, and we don’t have anybody else to say either way, we can’t discount that your amnesia came from an injury. If you sprained your ankle, you wouldn’t be running a marathon on it. Same thing with an injured brain, okay?”
“Okay,” you acquiesced, grabbing the canteen again. Already, your head was feeling a little better.
“You’re officially the easiest patient I’ve ever had,” he declared, sitting back down. “If I had lollipops to give out, you’d get one.”
Before you could say anything, Dejun held up a finger for you to wait, then grabbed his helmet and yanked it back on. “What the fuck… Alright, yeah, I agree, this is the best place to set up camp. Y/N confirmed it’s an ag bubble, we’ll be able to—Can I finish? Anyway, it’s an ag bubble, so we’ll be able to live here indefinitely. Cool, we’ll see you guys soon.”
Dejun took the helmet off again, resting it on his hip as he informed you, “Everyone’s coming back here to set up camp.”
“Making camp in the ag bubble does make the most sense,” you stated, looking around you. “Fresh air, running water, obviously unlimited food.”
“Glad you agree.”
“How long is your team supposed to be here?”
“Question for the captain.”
“Seems as though I have a lot of questions for the captain,” you sighed, resting your cheek on your knees as you traced figure-eights in the grass with your finger.
“He’s going to have a few for you as well.”
“I would ask what everybody went to go investigate, but I have a feeling…”
“Just wait until he gets back.”
“As I had guessed.”
There was a short rhythm of knocks at the door to the ag bubble, and Dejun jogged over to open it. “Clear!”
A group of UHN soldiers all entered, talking among themselves, though you could tell when their reflective face shields occasionally turned over towards you. You were still sitting on the ground, hugging your knees to your chest, and uncertainly got to your feet, brushing away any stray dirt that may have clung to you. Dejun put himself between them and you, holding his hands out, and you could very clearly hear the word ‘amnesia’ a few times as he seemed to be sternly prefacing this introduction, taking his role as your doctor seriously.
Judging by how he held himself, the one that you were pretty sure was the captain cocked his head at this information, but remained quiet through Dejun’s small spiel. The medic gestured as if he were rushing them, and they all reached up to take their helmets off as well. He finally led them over to you, offering you a reassuring smile.
“Y/N, this is the crew of the Vision,” he motioned to all five of them. “I’ll let our captain take over on introductions.”
“Thanks, Lieutenant,” the one that you had already pinpointed as the captain from afar spoke up. Despite not being the tallest of them, he held himself differently, as if there was some weight there that you couldn’t see, but he carried with a straight back and level shoulders nevertheless. “I’m Captain Qian Kun of the United Human Navy vessel the Vision. I’m sure our doctor, Lieutenant Xiao, has already introduced himself. This is the rest of my… ragtag team: Corporal Wong Kunhang…”
You looked at the only other man aside from Dejun who was familiar to you, who fixed you with an exceptionally apologetic gaze.
“I am very sorry about earlier, ma’am,” he bowed his head regretfully, hands clasped behind his back.
“Oh, thank you,” you responded. “I’m sure you’re very funny, Corporal Wong, to other people.”
A couple of the others let out snickers as they tried to stay at attention, Dejun and another openly bursting into laughter. The taller one quickly scrambled to get back into his position and push down his smile as the captain focused his gaze on all of them again.
Captain Qian continued, “Staff Sergeant Ten Lee.”
He flashed you a grin. “It’s a pleasure, ma’am.”
“Lieutenant Liu Yangyang…”
“Nice to meet you!” Lieutenant Liu beamed at you, though there was a weird little glint in his eye that you weren’t sure if you liked. It was like he was trying to take you apart piece by piece. His gaze hadn’t left you through everybody else’s introduction, and you weren’t liking having to meet it now. “And can I just say, I think you’re one of the funniest beings in the galaxy? Definitely funnier than Wong over there.”
“Kid’s making some points,” Ten elbowed Wong.
Captain Qian suddenly took over again very loudly, “And finally, our only civilian member of the crew, Professor Dong Sicheng, Department of Xenolinguistics at New Beijing University.”
This was the other guy who had outright laughed a moment ago, and you could tell he was much less comfortable with the stiff military position before Captain Qian had informed you he was a civilian. Despite his civilian status, though, he was in the same armor and carried the same arms as everyone else—more firepower than Dejun did. You were just glad to not have to be making eye contact with Liu anymore. It felt like he knew something that you didn’t, and you definitely didn’t like that, given your current predicament.
Six of them. Turning back to Captain Qian, you tilted your head curiously. “ZEN is… your ship’s AI? And you all have a synchronous fragment in your helmets, earpieces, and neural ports?”
A couple of them looked at Dejun incredulously.
“I didn’t tell her. She has amnesia, she’s not an idiot,” he retorted.
“Maybe you did something with tech,” Ten suggested. “Could be why you were here.”
“What did I just tell you about stressing her memory?” Dejun scolded him. “She needs to rest.”
“We all do,” Captain Qian agreed. “After we set up camp. Come on.”
Dejun shooed you away from helping to set up camp despite already knowing that you had no physical injuries, finally giving you a task of making sure all of his emergency canteens in his medic packs had fresh water from the river nearby. You knew it was busy work, but did it anyway, glad to feel useful.
Loaded up with canteens slung around your waist and shoulders, you took the paved pathways between the acres of crops until you reached a crystal clear river. There were some areas that were sandy shores, and others that were grassy drop-offs. Stopping at a grassy drop-off, you sat down, the canteens clanking against each other. You took them off and poured out the water in them one-by-one, making a pile of empty canteens. Then you leaned over the edge and filled them up from the cool, gentle current, starting a second pile of full canteens.
You could feel the thud of heavy footsteps in the ground, and knew who was approaching you before Captain Qian even spoke.
“Mind if I join you?” He asked, and you looked over your shoulder to see him holding a large, empty water jug. “You seem to have grabbed the best spot.”
“Not at all.” You jerked your head towards the empty space on the other side of your full canteen pile.
He sat as well, grabbing an apparatus the size of his hand off the side and lowering that into the water instead of the entire jug. It was connected to the jug by a tube, and you watched as it moved water up from the river into the top of the container.
“Dejun didn’t tell me about ZEN earlier,” you said abruptly, trying to vouch for the doctor who so far had been the kindest person that you could remember in your life. “Really, I was guessing just from how you guys were talking—”
“It’s okay, Y/N, we weren’t being very discrete,” Captain Qian assured you. “Xiao isn’t one for lying to cover his ass, either. I believe him when he says that he didn’t tell you who exactly ZEN is.”
“There were a lot of questions I was asking that he couldn’t answer. Just kept telling me to ask you.”
“Like what?”
“Don’t you already know? His earpiece…”
“ZEN isolates comms as necessary when the unit is split up. The other five of us needed to hear each other more than we needed to eavesdrop on you two in here.”
You gnawed on your bottom lip nervously. “…He told me to take it easy, with my brain and the amnesia.”
“Maybe we can gently jog your memory,” he suggested.
“How?”
“That woman in the hall, in the yellow top. Did you know her?”
“I don’t know…” You replied regretfully. You were apparently the only person alive in this building, and couldn’t identify that woman. Were you friends? Should you be mourning her? Did she have a family? Was there anybody to tell to mourn her? It felt wrong that nobody would. And there were even more like that who you didn’t look at, who you hadn’t seen.
“It’s a big building. There were probably a lot of people working here. You might not have known everybody,” he replied casually.
You pushed one of your hands against your eye, against the pressure that was coming back. “No, I don’t… I don’t know anything. About what this place was for.”
“Alright, alright,” he held up his free hand in surrender.
When your head hurt less, and you had filled up a couple more canteens, you changed your focus. He had asked you a question, it was only fair you asked him one.
“Why are you guys here? To stop the Skippers?”
“No. We didn’t know there was any alien presence until we arrived and saw the ships out front.”
You kept your gaze on the running water as you tried to work through the information you were getting. “Then why did your team get sent here?”
“We’re trying to figure out what happened here too.”
“No,” you rejected that immediately, pointing in his general direction accusatorily. It didn’t make sense with everything you already knew. “You didn’t know there were Skippers here until you got here. Now you’re trying to figure out what happened here. So why were you coming here in the first place?”
The captain breathed out, his tone dropping the strained casualness it had before. “This is a UHN research facility. We were sent to investigate reports of unsanctioned experiments being conducted here.”
You snapped your head up to look at him. “What kind of experiments?”
“Look, rumors about this kind of stuff is everywhere. Urban legends, pulp fiction, everyone’s heard something about illegal government experiments. But reputable intelligence on this kind of stuff is few and far between. This one was trusted enough to get us out here, but unfortunately sparse on details.”
“I don’t know anything about it.”
“As you’ve already said,” he replied tersely.
“I don’t,” you repeated.
“I didn’t say you were lying.”
You didn’t love the pace that the captain was drip feeding you information, or for whatever purpose of his own that he was doing it, but he was giving you information, and in your state, that was vital. So you kept him engaged. “How do Skippers figure into those experiments?”
“We don’t know.”
“So it seems like we’re on the same page here.” You could almost laugh.
“Yes.”
When you looked over at Captain Qian, there was maybe the faintest curl of a smile at the corner of his mouth, but as soon as you had questioned it in your mind, it was gone. He continued filling his jug, and you continued filling the canteens. You were still thinking about his heavy footsteps, and wanted to keep him talking, wanted to grasp at any information you could get in hopes it slotted it somewhere in your own mind.
“Your armor…” You began, eyes dragging over the pieces he was wearing, everything except his helmet. “How can you wear it?”
He crooked an eyebrow up at you curiously. “You mean aside from putting it on my body?”
You looked at him entirely unamused before continuing, “It’s made to look like standard UHN armor, but I can hear that it’s made of material far denser than your teammates’.”
Both of his eyebrows lifted in surprise momentarily, before his expression was neutral once more, and he calmly informed you, “Minor skeletal enhancements.”
So that’s why he moved differently from the others.
“Why didn’t your teammates receive them?”
“The UHN doesn’t need to spend the money to equip every soldier with minor skeletal enhancements for armor that is very expensive to make.”
“So why are you worth the very expensive armor, then?”
“It’s actually the old stuff, they’ve moved on to newer and better.” He was done filling the jug now and stood up. “I’m not worth the expensive stuff anymore.”
“Why don’t they give you the new one?”
“It’s bigger and heavier, my skeletal enhancements wouldn’t be able to support it. They need younger people for that program.”
“You… are not very old,” you observed plainly.
He shouldered the jug of water that was bigger than his entire torso as if it were a pillow. “No. I’m not.”
You didn’t appreciate how he had skirted some of your questions, like why he had been chosen for such a program, but the scale of information he had implicitly given you in just a few words was more than enough to leave you floored. If that’s what the UHN was doing above the board, you weren’t sure if you wanted to find out what they considered unsanctionable—what was going on here.
Returning to the others, you were happy to see a fully set up camp, and handed over the refilled canteens to Dejun, who made sure to thank you profusely and reassure you that you were a huge help. Despite it feeling a little patronizing, you were satisfied at having at least done something rather than sitting around watching them do everything while you did nothing.
“Y/N!” Someone called out your name, you looked over your shoulder to see Ten and Wong approaching you.
“Yes, Corporal?”
He laughed and shook his head. “You don’t have to do that. Kunhang and Ten is just fine.”
His companion nodded in agreement.
“We’re on dinner duty,” Kunhang pointed between the two of them. “Do you know what all is in here?”
“Do you people know the meaning of the word amnesia?” Dejun snapped. “Honestly, ask ZEN if—”
“There should be a panel by the entrance that tells you that,” you answered, pointing towards the door. “I don’t think I remember the specifics of this ag bubble, but I’m pretty sure I’m remembering that correctly. Right? They all have information panels at the entrance?”
“It does,” Ten assured you of your knowledge. “It’s in Outspacer. We uploaded it to ZEN, but he— Oh, thanks, man.”
“Zennie, incredible timing as always,” Kunhang rolled his eyes. He smiled at you. “Never mind, got everything we need. Thanks!”
They walked away into the fields, and you turned back to Dejun, who was now organizing his supplies in his tent.
“I wish I could be more help,” you sighed.
“Y/N, come here,” he gestured you into the open entrance of the tent. You obliged, and he plopped down onto a cot on one side, then pointed to the other for you to sit. “They didn’t actually need your help.”
“But they asked—”
“I know. Without divulging too much, I can tell you that the seven of us have been essentially the only people we’ve all been around for… months on end.”
“I see.” You nodded, noting how he seemed to be including ZEN in that count. “I’m someone new to talk to.”
“Right. And the next thing I’m going to say, I do hope you don’t take this the wrong way. You’re also a pretty woman.”
“Oh…”
“Don’t get me wrong, you’re safe with us. But I’m just saying that you’ll probably be getting more attention than if we had a new guy in camp.”
“Is that why Liu keeps looking at me like that?” You asked.
“Like what?” Dejun’s brow furrowed.
“Like… I don’t know, he just keeps looking at me. Like he’s studying me.”
He shook his head. “I’ll talk to him. Kid probably isn’t used to seeing a human woman after so long.”
“Is there anything else I can help with?”
“I don’t have anything for you,” he said regretfully, then tapped his ear. “Captain? Yeah, what’s your location? Right, thanks, I’m sending Y/N your way.” He focused back on you. “Captain Qian’s in his tent, you can see if he has anything for you to do.”
“Which one’s his tent?”
“Right next door.”
“Ah. Thanks.”
You ducked out of Dejun’s tent, heading over to the next one. There was no door to knock on, but Captain Qian could already see you, and waved you in.
“Yes, Y/N? Do you need something?” He seemed to be in the middle of performing some sort of inspection of his armor, wearing only the bottom half of it, leaving him in a white tank top as he held the chest plate and paced in the small space of the tent.
“Is there something wrong with your armor?” You asked.
“Just routine maintenance,” he replied, stopping to remove an inner panel and set it on one of the cots that was already full of armor pieces. “ZEN detected an abnormal heart rate earlier, but I can’t see any reason for that.”
“Why are you checking your chestplate for that? Wouldn’t ZEN be monitoring your vitals through your neural port, not any external sensors?”
“I don’t think his reading was faulty, I’m just trying to look for anything that could have caused it.”
“Like what?”
“I don’t know what, that’s why I’m inspecting my armor.” He took another piece out, offering the one with the electrical components out to you. “Can you hold this?”
You took it, staring at the small, wafer-thin computer component in your hands. “You’re right, this is older tech.”
“How so?”
“It’s twice the size it needs to be and—” You held it up to the light, seeing the distinct refractive rainbows in between the ultra-thin layers. “Doesn’t have the superconductive gel preferred now. It’s not like it’s ancient or anything, but the UHN wouldn’t be issuing anything new like this.”
“Is it in good condition?”
“Yes, everything looks fine. No acute damage, and it looks like it’s been taken care of very well, even for typical use. This definitely isn’t what caused your abnormal heartrate.”
Captain Qian held his hand out, and you placed the component in his palm for him to reassemble the chest piece. “I agree. Now, did you need something, Y/N?”
“Yes. Is there something I can do to help? Dejun didn’t have anything else for me.”
“Since you seem to know quite a bit about UHN armor, you want to finish helping me with my inspection?”
“Sure, sure.”
He set the reassembled chest piece on the ground, then looked at you expectantly. You stared back.
He pointed to the exit. “I need to get out of the rest of my armor. It’s a one-man job.”
“Oh! Sorry!” You hurried to leave, and heard him zip up the entrance behind you.
It unzipped again a few minutes later, and the captain clipped the material aside again. You followed him back in, seeing all of his armor laid out on the floor between the two cots. The captain was in a dark t-shirt, pants, and regular boots now as he picked up a piece and sat down on a cot. He nodded to the other for you.
You selected the left arm and quietly began working. It should have been weird, how you knew this but not how you got here, but you swallowed down that discomfort and just focused on the technology in your hands. You had a task, at least, and that was good enough for now. Feeling around, you found the release that separated the upper and lower limb pieces from each other, and set the upper half aside for now. You continued looking over the paneling of the lower arm.
“You’ll be staying in Xiao’s tent,” Captain Qian said. “If that’s alright with you. We would have preferred to give you your own tent, obviously, but we didn’t exactly have a spare. Figured you’re probably the most comfortable with him, right?”
“That’ll be fine, yes,” you agreed. “Thank you.”
“You’re probably wondering where we all went earlier, right? When we left you and Xiao here?”
“Yes. I had asked him, but he said that was a question for you.”
“Remember the reports of unsanctioned experiments I mentioned?”
“Yes.”
“It was a lab.”
“And what was in it?”
“Ash.”
“Someone burned it down? How did it not catch the whole building on fire?”
“Liu thinks they were careful to use certain materials to control and contain the fire to one area for a certain amount of time.”
“So it wasn’t part of the human-Skipper fighting, then? If someone took the time to make sure it burned in a specific way.”
“Most likely. But Liu’s a roboticist, not a chemist. His knowledge could only go so far. And ZEN is only as much of a help as the sensors we have to gather data for him.”
“How do you know it was a laboratory then? If everything was burned up?”
“ZEN and the Professor translated the sign on the outside.”
“It wasn’t in standard human?”
“Outspacer again.” Captain Qian clicked his tongue. “For a UHN facility supposedly built within the last ten years, this place has a lot of an ancient, dead alien language in it.”
“That… does seem unlikely.”
“The only reason I can think of why humans would do that, is if they didn’t want other humans to be able to read any of it.”
“Or anybody.” You moved on to the upper limb. “The Outspacers have been gone for hundreds of millions of years. Nobody, human or alien, uses it anymore.”
“You’re right.” Captain Qian said thoughtfully. “Whatever those Skippers came here for, they weren’t going to be successful, whether they lived or not.”
You looked up at the captain curiously. “How long is your team going to be here?”
“I don’t know,” he replied. “Our original mission here was supposed to be short, just intel-gathering. A few days, one week tops, then come back later if necessary. But now… things seem to be a lot more complicated.”
“What’ll you do with me when you leave?”
“Take you back to UHN Main on Earth for debriefing, and if you haven’t recalled anything about where you’re from by then, they’ve got programs to help people get back on their feet,” he answered simply. “We’re not going to kill you.”
“I didn’t expect that,” you balked. “Though I’m not sure I like the sound of this debriefing…”
“It won’t be the most fun interview of your life, but you’ll live.”
“What should I call you?”
“Pardon?”
“Dejun, Kunhang, and Ten all told me to address them informally. The others call you Captain, I don’t want to offend, I don’t know, I’ve been avoiding calling you anything because I don’t know…”
He held your eye contact for a moment, then went back to rotating the leg piece in front of his gaze. “Kun. You can call me Kun.”
“Okay,” you nodded, trying not to immediately let it go to your head. “Thank you.”
After finishing the inspection of his armor, you and Kun had determined that there was nothing wrong with it: no faulty wiring, no disarticulation of the joints, no loose bolts, no misalignment of the hydraulics, no error codes thrown by the computer, no fritzing electronics, not a flaw in sight.
“Nothing,” you huffed, hands on your hips as you stared down at the mostly reassembled armor. It was half put back together, ready for the next time he had to wear it.
“Maybe I just got spooked then,” Kun shrugged. “Thanks anyway, Y/N.”
“How often do you get spooked?” You asked him doubtfully. “You don’t seem the type to startle easily.”
“Not often.”
“When did it happen?”
He shook his head dismissively. “It’s fine.”
“If you’re having early signs of heart problems—”
“Hey, who was just saying I’m not old?” He put a hand over his chest.
“I said early.”
“And you’re sounding like Xiao.”
“And if you’re all like this, I can see why he would complain about having you for patients.”
“It was when we were clearing the building,” he relented. “I’d have to watch the footage from my helmet back on the ship to see exactly what was going on. So just leave it, okay?”
You sighed. “Alright, fine.”
The volume outside the tent suddenly rose, and Kun nodded towards the exit. “Now come on, sounds like everyone’s getting together for mess.”
He stepped back for you to walk out first, and you immediately saw that the others were in fact gathered in the center of the tents around a small fire. Dejun waved at you and patted the ground next to him, and you gratefully took the empty spot between him and Ten. Kun sat across the fire, immediately being pulled into a conversation by Liu and the Professor.
“So what did you guys end up finding?” You asked Kunhang and Ten as they started serving up food in small metal dishes.
“We’ve got a beautiful fare for you tonight of rations,” Ten handed you a dish with great gravitas, and you giggled as you passed it down.
“Supplemented with some lentils,” Kunhang finished. “We thought we were heading towards the berries, get a little dessert going, but apparently ZEN’s translation wasn’t completely accurate. Ended up at the red lentils.”
You laughed again. “You can’t blame him too much, the words are almost the same.”
Everyone’s heads whipped over to look at you. The Professor’s eyes bulged out of his face. “You know Outspacer?”
“I mean, I can’t speak it. It’s been dead for so long, I wouldn’t know what anything is supposed to sound like. If it was even spoken in the first place,” you answered hesitantly. “But yeah, I can read it.”
Liu looked around at everyone else incredulously. “Did nobody ask her how she got into the safe room locked behind Outspacer controls? Or did you all assume she had button mashed her way in?”
“Okay, we had more pressing things on our minds,” Dejun cut in. “Like making sure she was alive.”
The Professor was still staring at you with fascination. “You said it might not have been spoken. Why do you think that?”
“Well, it’s a very visual and categorical system. That’s why ZEN’s mistranslation for lentil and berry happened. Two things that are small and round that you eat are going to have very similar patterns to each other. Berries have a sweet modifier appended to the end, by the way, while lentils have the ground modifier to indicate that they’re a grain.” You didn’t know where all this knowledge was coming from, but you knew that it was right, as well as you knew your name. “But it only ever describes objects and their relationships in space and time. There’s no abstract ideas like feelings. It might just be a code to convey physical information, instructions, that kind of stuff, not their written alphabet.”
“Why have a separate code then?”
“The Outspacers were everywhere, weren’t they? It would’ve been impossible for them all to speak the same language. This way everything that’s important like laws, directions, warnings, that kind of stuff, is in a common code that everyone can read.”
The Professor kept staring at you.
“Y/N, you broke the Professor,” Kunhang declared, snapping his fingers in front of his teammate’s face.
“I’m sorry. I-I didn’t mean to.” You looked around hesitantly.
“Don’t apologize,” Dejun chuckled, patting your shoulder. “He’s probably just mourning all the academic articles he’ll never get to publish on this.”
“Why?”
“Cla-ssi-fied,” Liu said with a hint of teasing, enunciating each syllable for emphasis. “Officially, our crew doesn’t exist.”
Kun rolled his eyes. “That’s a bit dramatic. You’re still official personnel of UHN, you haven’t been scrubbed from the universe.”
“Fine, fine. We’re a self-contained vessel whose missions are not officially documented anywhere. Better?”
“Best would’ve been to keep your mouth shut,” the captain said through gritted teeth.
“She can read Outspacer! Like we’re not going to keep her?”
“Y/N’s not a puppy or a toy, Lieutenant. It’s not a matter of ‘keeping’ her. She’s a civilian whose safety we’re responsible for. The matter is closed,” Kun’s hard gaze shifted to the rest of his crew on the word, before returning to the roboticist, “and you and I are going to have a discussion later.”
“Sir, yes sir,” Liu muttered, turning his eyes back to the fire.
Ten nudged a dish into your hands, and you passed it onto Dejun. When everyone had a bowl, they started eating, and you slowly began working through your food as well.
“Anyway, Y/N,” Kun cleared his throat, and you looked up at him attentively. “We’ll need you to properly translate the ag bubble info panel tomorrow. So hopefully Wong doesn’t poison us at breakfast.”
“Yeah, of course,” you agreed hurriedly. “Whatever you guys need.”
“You’ll have to review my notes on Outspacer glyphs!” The Professor had suddenly found his voice again, his tone now rushed and excited.
“Sure, yes.”
You spent the rest of the meal mostly keeping to yourself, quietly eating your food and occasionally engaging with the others if they talked to you first. Today, the only day of your life that you could remember, had been a lot, and if every day was like this, you weren’t sure if you were really looking forward to the rest of them.
Everyone had a job to shut camp down for the night, and you helped Kunhang and Ten clean up from cooking dinner.
“So is there a light switch or something?” Ten looked up at the still rather bright sky.
“The lights are on a timer,” you explained, looking up. “It should—”
The sky above you began to dim just then. You kept watching, explaining to the Marines with you, “Here, keep your eyes on it. Blink and you’ll miss the sunset.”
The sunset happened all around you, with no one source of light from a single ‘Sun,’ it wasn’t focused from any one point, instead the scattering came from every angle. Everywhere you looked was a different smattering of red, orange, and pink hues.
“Holy shit…” Kunhang breathed out, doing a slow 360.
Then, as soon as it had started, it was over, and the artificial expanse above you was pitch black.
“Damn, that was fast,” Ten commented.
“Told you.” You stacked up the dried dishes. “Where do these go?”
“Right here.”
After packing up the dinner items, you turned back to them expectantly. “Anything else?”
“Sleep,” Ten declared, to which Kunhang groaned and nodded. “Some very well-earned sleep, for all of us.”
“Are you sure?”
Kunhang gently grabbed you by your shoulders and pushed you towards your tent. “Go. To. Sleep.”
“Okay, okay.” You held your hands up in surrender, slowly walking away.
“Goodnight!” “Night!” They called after you cheerily.
“Goodnight!” You waved to them over your shoulder. As you turned your head, you saw someone sitting on a pack on the ground outside Kun’s tent, and realized that it was the Professor, scrawling on a tablet with a stylus.
Your tent was unzipped, and you found Dejun seemingly ready for bed, laying on one of the cots and reading a thick hardcover book by the light of a small electric lantern.
“The Professor was not in his tent yet,” you informed Dejun with a frown. “Are you all doing watches? I thought you had cleared the building.”
“No night watches,” he replied without looking up from the book. “He’s just out there because he’s sharing a tent with Captain Qian, who is currently still ripping Liu a new one in said tent.”
“Oh…”
“Don’t feel bad, Y/N. Liu said something stupid, he gets chewed out, repeat ad nauseum.” Dejun flipped the page. “Bit more stupid, telling you the classified nature of our team’s missions, but like I said before: you’ve got amnesia, you’re not an idiot. You’re clearly very smart in your own right; you would’ve put it together before the end of your time with us. You probably already had your suspicions before he said anything, right?”
“There were some things that had caught my attention, yes.”
“Care to share?”
“Your green medic patch looked like it had been reapplied recently, there’s not a lot of typical scenarios that would require a medic to need to take it off in the first place. You have a civilian xenolinguistics professor attached to your unit who is just as armed as the rest of you. Nobody has mentioned reporting to a higher-ranking officer than your captain since being here, despite what you found. You’ve all talked about the mission being very long, not wanting to tell me too many details, and how you haven’t been around anybody but each other pretty much the entire time.”
“The medic patch really clued you in?” He laughed. “I slapped that back on less than a minute before jumping out of the ship onto this planet. Good one.”
“I didn’t know they let you bring those,” you referred to the book in his hands. “Figured it’d be a fire hazard.”
“We’re allowed one personal effect,” he explained, turning a page, the paper looking soft and worn. “Fire hazard be damned.”
“And what book did you choose?”
“It’s not mine. It’s Liu’s.” He angled it so you could see the cover.
“‘On the Ethics of Robotics?’” You read the title aloud. “Why are you reading a treatise on ethics in a completely different field?”
“One: It’s been a long mission, you get bored. Two: Now that I’ve actually started reading it… It’s kind of interesting. Gets you thinking. It was written over fifty years ago, so some of the actual science is out of date. But he still talks about some pretty interesting stuff.”
“Was it written by a roboticist or an ethicist?”
“Roboethicist. The very first one. Coined the term and everything.” Dejun dog-eared a page before setting the book aside. “He’s like, Liu’s hero. Liu even got to take a couple classes from the guy during his degree before he died.”
“Wow.”
“Anyway, I’m ready to pass out, and as your doctor, I say it’s bedtime for you too.”
“I will not argue that.” You agreed, laying down as well.
Dejun reached down to turn the light off.
“Goodnight, Y/N.”
“Goodnight, Dejun.”
You were the first one awake in camp. Or so you had thought, as you emerged into the still darkened ag bubble. Liu was sitting around the remnants of the campfire, and for a second, you wondered if he had been made to sleep out here.
His eyes immediately snapped open, and he smiled at you. “Morning! Want to go for a walk?”
“Are you sure we should leave camp?” You looked over towards the captain’s tent hesitantly.
“You can make sure we’re back before sunrise, right?”
You thought momentarily. “It’s in eleven minutes…”
“We’ll be back before then.” He got to his feet. “Scout’s honor.”
You followed him. “You’re in the Navy…”
“Old Earth saying,” he explained, starting on one of the paths between the fields. “It relates to this organization, the Boy Scouts. Doesn’t exist anymore, but the lingo is still around.”
“They were honorable?”
“Don’t know how honorable a bunch of grade schoolers could be, but it’s just an expression.”
“I see…”
“Anyway, sorry about last night,” Liu said. “I got excited and put you in a really awkward situation. Not only that but a dangerous one, too. You’re a civvie, and the more you know, the more you’re at risk. I shouldn’t have said anything.”
“Thank you, L—”
“God, Yangyang, please,” he rebuffed you before you could finish your sentence. “I’d never hear the end of it if you called the other guys their names and me by rank.”
“Thank you, Yangyang.” You smiled. “May I ask how much younger you are than your teammates?”
“This is my first mission, if that gives you any context.”
“And you were put on one of this caliber?”
“It’s the Professor’s first mission too, in my defense,” he scoffed. “But guys like me usually don’t get a lot of field experience. There’s plenty of roboticists who go their whole careers in the UHN without ever seeing action.”
“So then why are you on this mission?”
“I… actually don’t know.”
“They didn’t tell you?”
“We were all put in a room, minus the Professor, then the captain came in with the Professor and told us we’d all been selected for this team. Professor included.”
“Interesting.”
“I actually don’t know if I was supposed to tell you that…”
“You’re not very good at this classified stuff, are you?”
“You ask a lot of questions!” He said defensively.
You couldn’t help but laugh. “I don’t know anything! That’s all I can do!”
“You know how to read Outspacer,” Yangyang pointed out.
“Well, yes.”
“And you seem to be pretty good with tech. How much longer do we have until sunrise?”
“We should head back now,” you answered immediately.
Yangyang pivoted on his heel. “See? You know stuff.”
You kept pace with his change in direction. “Okay, fair point.”
“You should ask Captain Qian if you can tag along to this other place we found here.”
“What sort of place?”
“Robots,” he grinned. “I won’t say more, but I have a hunch you might know what to do in there.”
“Finally figured out what classified means?”
“Okay, ouch.”
“I’m just saying… I’d hate for the Professor to be stranded outside his tent again tonight.” You shook your head teasingly.
“So you do have a real sense of humor,” Yangyang grinned. “Instead of unintentionally slam dunking on Wong every chance you get.”
“Just because I don’t understand Kunhang’s attempts at humor doesn’t mean I don’t have a sense of humor.” You crossed your arms, a bit miffed at the implication.
“Fair point,” he agreed. “You could be from somewhere else. Most of us are Earth boys, after all.”
“Most?”
“You didn’t hear it from me but, Captain Qian is actually from Theta-12. Came to Earth later.”
“Dura-Jil?” You recalled the name that locals had for it. It was one of the first colonies that Earth had established outside of its own galaxy, and wasn’t exactly considered a roaring success, now known to be a dinky outpost only frequented by those who wanted to remain under the radar of the law, ran by a local government who looked the other way for a price. Overall, it was pretty low on the UHN’s list of priorities with everything else going on.
“Yep.” The two of you were back at camp now, and Yangyang lowered his voice. “But uh, that’s all I can say.”
“All you can say or all you know?”
He shrugged and grinned. “Who’s to say?”
The others emerged from their tents then, and you were immediately accosted by the Professor, wanting to watch you decode the ag bubble information panel.
As you read off the panel to the Professor, he stopped you every so often to request an explanation for why certain glyphs were in certain places. You explained them as best you could—after all, you didn’t invent the language—and ZEN transcribed the corrected translation for the team’s reference.
“Professor…” You said in a pause as he was fervently scribbling notes on his tablet.
“Yes?” He replied without looking. You noted that he was the only one of the team who didn’t seem to mind being addressed by his title.
“May I ask how a civilian professor got attached to a military unit?” You tried to be as general as possible, well aware that ZEN was listening.
“I’m a xenolinguistics professor.”
“Doesn’t the UHN have their own translators?”
“I’m very good at my job.”
He was better at this classified stuff than Yangyang.
“Next part, Y/N,” he instructed, pointing back to the panel.
“Right, sorry.” You tapped to the next section of information. “Huh…”
“‘Huh?’” The Professor echoed. “‘Huh’ —What?”
“What translation did ZEN have for this part? The last section?”
“He didn’t have one. We had too few characters to translate anything of substance. Why? What is it?”
You frowned as you reread it. “It’s instructions for modifying the ag bubble.”
“What’s the problem with that?”
“These modifications… The sorts of crops produced wouldn’t be suited for human consumption.”
“What species, then? Outspacer?”
“I… don’t think so.” You winced as a dull throbbing started in your head again. “Unless the Outspacers had caloric energy intake requirements equal to the energy of a supernova.”
“What?!”
“These foods would be impossibly calorically dense… literally… they’d contain so much energy I… Here, it says who is supposed to eat them at the top but I’ve never seen that word before.”
“Do you know the characters?”
“Yeah, I know most of it. It looks like it should be person, but… that can’t be right.”
“What is it?”
“It has machine after it.”
“Person-machine? Like a robot? This is to modify the ag bubble to make robot fuel? What kind? Electric? Nuclear? It can’t be fossil fuels, surely.”
“No, it would still produce crops and food. They’re definitely meant to be eaten, a lot of them have the ground modifier on them. And the word for robot is different. It’s machine, and the glyph for when an object is moving itself. This is person-machine-move. And it’s plural.”
“People-robots?” The Professor surmised. “People… robots?”
Your head hurt even more as you nodded. “Could be. I don’t know what that’s supposed to mean, or what any of these crops would even be, or what could eat them.”
“Is that everything in the info panel?” The Professor asked.
“Yeah, yeah. You guys should be able to find everything now.”
“ZEN?” The Professor started walking back towards camp, speaking to his tablet. You trailed behind him, trying to blink away your new headache. “Send the corrected map to everyone’s HUDs, please.”
“Already done, Professor,” ZEN’s voice came from the tablet as a small green cube avatar projected just above the screen, the hologram doing a small bounce as if nodding. This morning was the first time you were actually interacting with the AI directly. His speech was seamless, as if a real person was talking, and he spoke in a surprisingly pleasant tenor.
The Professor was unfazed by his sudden appearance. “Of course, thank you. And don’t be rude, introduce yourself to Y/N.”
A lighter face of the cube turned towards you, despite all of them being blank, and the avatar tilted forward in a bow. “I’m ZEN, the crew’s AI. It’s a pleasure, ma’am. Corporal Wong calls me Zennie, if a nickname would make you more comfortable.”
“ZEN is just fine, if that’s what you prefer,” you offered a wincing smile. “If you’ll call me Y/N, since I prefer that over being called ma’am.”
“Seems we understand each other then,” ZEN responded graciously.
“Seems we do.”
“I’ve got to let the captain know about the uh, people-robots.” The Professor took off as you arrived back at the camp.
The artificial sun had risen while you were with the Professor, and everyone was now bustling around with their morning tasks. You saw Ten and Kunhang heading off into the fields as Yangyang and Dejun seemed to be discussing something as they passed a thermos back and forth around the empty firepit. You were contemplating going into your tent until breakfast to nurse this headache when you heard your name being called from another section of camp.
You turned around to see the Professor’s head poking out of Kun’s tent, and he waved you over. You quickly obliged, ducking in after him.
Kun was pacing again, pinching the bridge of his nose. ZEN was projecting both himself and a set of Outspacer glyphs from where the Professor’s tablet was resting on his cot. You recognized it as the “people-robots” one that had troubled the Professor earlier.
“Y/N,” Kun began immediately, stopping and pointing at the glyph. “You’re sure that says people robots?”
“I mean, I know the parts, but I’ve never seen them all put together like that,” you explained. “It’s person, then machine, then to move oneself, and it’s plural. And it’s definitely all one word. But any meaning that I’d be assigning to it after that would be interpretation.”
“The Professor mentioned that robot is machine-move, correct?”
“Yes.”
“And you said it’s describing who would be eating modified crops produced by the ag bubble.”
“Yes.”
Dejun was right, thinking with an injured brain fucking hurt.
“Is there any other indication as to what this could mean?”
“No, it says it like we’re supposed to know what it means. But I don’t.”
He sighed. “Alright, thank you, Y/N. If you could give me a moment with the Professor and ZEN?”
“Of course.” You nodded, heading back out of the tent.
Dejun and Yangyang were still around the firepit, but your feet felt restless, and you took off towards the river. You followed the grassy parts of the riverside until you decided you were done walking, and laid down, staring up at the seemingly-endless-but-not-really blue above you. You kept poking around in your memory, trying to find any context for people-robots, or what you were doing here, or the woman in the hall, or why Skippers would show up, or why you knew a long dead alien language, or anything.
Your head hurt more the more you used it, with each new topic you tried, but you kept trying to think. Maybe if you just kept going, right on the other side of the pain would be the answer, if you could just get past this feeling like your brain was a nuclear reactor on the verge of a meltdown. You squeezed your eyes shut against the sky that was suddenly too bright.
“Hey.” Kun’s voice caught your attention, and your eyes snapped open. He was standing next to you, two dishes in hand. “Soup’s on.”
“Oh.” You sat up and he handed yours to you. “This is oatmeal.”
“It means a meal is ready to eat. Any food, not just soup.”
“Got it… Sorry for making you come out here to find me, by the way.”
“Mind if I join you?”
“No, not at all.”
He sat next to you as you started looking over the meal. It looked like Ten and Kunhang were successful in their berry search this morning, as your oatmeal was topped with a very colorful assortment.
“How are you holding up?” Kun asked, looking out at the river.
“Honestly, my head kind of hurts,” you admitted, rubbing one of your eyes.
“You want me to call Xiao over?”
“No, it’s… I’m trying to remember stuff, but the more I try to remember, the more it hurts.”
“You’ve got to stop forcing it,” he chastised you lightly. “It’s like picking a scab, you’re going to want to keep doing it. But you’ve got to stop, alright?”
“Yeah, okay,” you acquiesced with a sigh, dropping your hand.
“It’ll come.”
“What if it doesn’t?”
“Then you keep going.”
“That’s it?”
He shrugged. “What other choice do you have?”
You thought for a moment. “Sitting and staring at a wall forever.”
Kun laughed for the first time that you’d heard, and you turned your head to look, catching a glimpse of a dimple as he nodded. “Yeah, I guess you could do that. Be pretty boring, though.”
“I suppose it would be.” You smiled down at your oatmeal, once again trying not to let it go to your head.
He set down his bowl and opened a thermos he had also brought on a strap around his shoulders, a wisp of steam escaping. “Do you like tea? Unfortunately, somebody forgot our cups on the ship, so you’ll just have to use the lid.”
You didn’t know if you liked tea, but you figured you might as well find out now, nodding and then asking, “Who was responsible for the cups?”
“Three guesses, first two don’t count.” He poured until the lid was nearly full, then gingerly offered it out to you.
You accepted it with two hands, feeling the heat through the metal easily. “Then what’s the point of giving me three guesses?”
“It’s a saying, when an answer is obvious to everyone involved.”
“More Earth boy stuff?” You blew over the surface of the tea.
“What?”
“I was talking to Yangyang earlier and he kept saying stuff like that I didn’t get. He said it was probably because he’s an ‘Earth boy.’ And Dejun explained that the thing Kunhang said yesterday about angels is an old Earth saying.”
“Do you think you’re not from Earth then? A colony?”
“I don’t know.” You frowned, taking a sip of the tea. It was warm, comforting, and you figured that you liked the way the richness spread across your tongue.
“Of course, my apologies.” He then added, “Wong forgot the cups, by the way.”
You chuckled. “That was my first guess.”
The two of you finished your oatmeal in what you decided was a peaceful silence, and were left to sip on the still-warm tea.
“Could you… tell me about where you’re from?” You requested quietly, looking over at him.
He eyed you questioningly. “Why?”
“I don’t have a home to remember… I don’t know, it’d be nice to hear about someone else’s.”
Kun sipped from the thermos before setting it aside. “I’m originally from Dura-Jil—Theta-12. I didn’t go to Earth until I joined the UHN.”
“Oh.”
“You don’t look surprised.” He arched an eyebrow. “I take it Liu may have mentioned that one of us wasn’t an Earth boy?”
“He didn’t say much.”
“He doesn’t know much,” the captain retorted. “That’s about all he does know. My team trusts me to tell them what they need to know when they need to know it. If they want to ask questions, they know they can, and I’ll tell them if they need to know the answer yet or not.”
“Have they asked about your home?”
“No, they haven’t. The Professor had mentioned my being from Dura-Jil in passing once, but the crew has not brought it up since.”
“Why not?”
“I think they have some… presuppositions about how I feel about my home planet.” He rolled his neck out. “It’s not exactly humanity’s pride and joy, after all.”
“They think you’d be ashamed?” You concluded.
“Or at least trying to distance myself, for the sake of my career. Having ties to a place like that doesn’t look great if you’ve got your eyes on Fleet Admiral.”
“Do you? Want to be Fleet Admiral?”
He looked at you curiously. “Why wouldn’t I?”
“It’d be more of a desk job, wouldn’t it? Lots of paperwork, politics. Not everyone likes that kind of stuff. It’s also a lot of eyes on you. Couldn’t have the kind of anonymity that being a black ops captain from Dura-Jil affords you.” You pulled your knees to your chest and rested your chin on them. “Not everyone wants the same kind of life.”
Kun chuckled cynically. “You’re right. That’s something I’ve had to learn recently.”
“So will you tell me about Dura-Jil?”
“Yes. But later, breakfast’s over.” He stood up. You quickly tipped back the rest of the tea from the lid and handed it to him so he could close up the thermos. “Find me after mess tonight, we can talk again then, alright?”
“Will do.” You got to your feet as well, starting back towards camp with him. “So what are you all doing today?”
“We have a post-mess meeting in the morning. We’ll discuss the plan for the day there.”
“Oh, okay.”
“We’ll be splitting into two groups today,” the captain announced the plan for the day. Everyone was gathered around, back in their armor save for their helmets, which you presumed was for your sake. “I believe there were two places we found yesterday that warrant further investigation first. I want us to look at that lab with fresh eyes, and Liu, I know you found an area of interest yesterday.”
“Sir, yes sir,” the younger man nodded excitedly.
“Xiao, you didn’t see the lab yesterday, I want you on it in case you see something we might have missed.”
“Yes sir.”
“Professor, Wong, go with him.”
They nodded.
“That means Ten and I are with Liu.”
Everyone looked over at you with bated breath as you kept your eyes on Kun expectantly, waiting for him to presumably assign you to stay in the camp all day where you wouldn’t be in the way.
Kun finally met your gaze. “Y/N…”
“Yes?”
“Liu thinks you may be useful where we’re headed. And since the other group will have the Professor, it’ll be useful to have someone who can read Outspacer with us,” he said all of this matter-of-factly. “We obviously don’t have any armor for you, but if you’re alright with it, I’d like for you to accompany my team today. This way we can have eyes on you as well.”
“Yes!” You rushed to agree before he could take it back. “If you think I can help, of course.”
“Then we’re set.” He nodded.
And so your two groups set off in different directions from the ag bubble with an agreement to meet back up an hour before dinner.
“So where exactly are we headed?” You took your rebreather off to ask, then put it back. The air in the hallways was still noxious, and though you weren’t as rattled as yesterday, you tried to avoid looking too closely at any of the bodies, human or alien, as you passed them.
“The Professor and I found a robotics lab,” Yangyang explained from beside you, clearly ecstatic about the prospect. “I didn’t get to look around much, but it looked awesome.”
“And with the new information we have about the people-robots from the ag bubble panel, I’m interested in what exactly is in there as well,” Kun declared from the front.
“What do you think they could be, Liu?” Ten questioned from where he was once again bringing up the rear of your small group. “The people-robots.”
“If you want a linguistics analysis, you’ll have to ask the Professor. But…” he inhaled. “It could be androids, or humanoids, or cyborgs, or AI-bots, or—”
“What’s the difference between all of those? And how would those be different than AI or robots?”
“Well we already have robots, right? Machines that move on their own, take commands, that sort of thing. They have positronic brains. Then we have AI, which is all coding, programming, the artificial intelligence, like ZEN.”
“I’m with you so far, kid. What’s the other stuff?”
“They’re all theoretical, nobody’s been able to make them yet, so there’s no exact definition. But generally, an android would be a robot that’s meant to look like a human.”
“A lot already do.”
“They’re metal and sort of have cartoon faces and are in general people shapes, sure,” Yangyang snorted. “But an android would actually look like a human. Like, you couldn’t tell the difference. Skin, hair, eyes, teeth, fingernails, eyelashes, everything. But it would still be all robot on the inside. Positronic brain, metal, wires, still a machine, but with a human exterior.”
“Creepy…” Ten commented. “So then what’s a humanoid?”
“A humanoid is supposed to be some combination of human and robot,” the roboticist was chattering excitedly again. “Everybody’s come up with their own range of how robotic and human these could be, and different names for each sub-category, but they’re all largely classified under humanoids. They always have some combination of robot and human parts. And the human parts are actually organic. Androids just look like humans, but humanoids would actually have some human stuff in there.”
“Like what? Just tossing a kidney into a robot for fun?”
“Most of the hypothesizing done has been about the merits of positronic brains versus human brains. And it’s all theoretical, of course.” He then looked around at the facility you were in. “Probably… Anyway, it’s probably not cyborgs, because those are just people with some robotic or mechanical aspect to them. You could consider anybody with a prosthetic to be a cyborg under that definition, really.”
You looked over at him curiously. “How is that different than a humanoid?”
“You have to add robot parts to an already-existing human to make a cyborg. Usually to restore something they lost, or to extend certain capabilities beyond those of normal humans. A humanoid would be entirely lab-made, the robotics and the organic material.”
Ten interrupted, “You’re saying they could’ve been growing people here?”
“You say that as if IVF and organoids don’t exist.”
“I don’t think I want to know what the hell an organoid is,” he groaned. “Just sounds gross…”
“What about AI-bots, Yangyang?” You prompted him to move onto a hopefully less horrifying option.
“Oh!” Yangyang perked up. “AI-bots, right. Since AI don’t have the same safety mechanisms that positronic brains do, the regulations have erred on the side of not giving them physical bodies. ZEN can only directly do stuff to computer systems that he can get into from the back. Right, buddy?”
“Yes, I do have some limits.” It was strange hearing ZEN’s voice coming from the external speaker on Yangyang’s helmet, but you were glad to at least not be left out of that end of the conversation now.
“And if he wants to exert influence in the physical world, one of us meatsacks has to do his bidding, and the closest he can get to being in the physical world is to be in someone’s neural port and experience it through their central nervous system. Right?”
“Why do you all insist on calling yourselves meatsacks in reference to me…?” ZEN almost sounded troubled at the thought.
“We’re just teasing you, dude,” Yangyang snickered. “Anyway, an AI-bot would be putting an AI in a robot. So instead of a positronic brain controlling it, it would be an AI.”
“What do you think, ZEN? Want a body of your own?” Ten asked.
“No, thank you,” ZEN’s voice now came from behind you, projected from Ten’s speaker. “I’m quite content with being stratified data, actually. As much as you all dislike my being in your neural ports, I find it equally… visceral.”
Yangyang laughed. “Damn, tell us how you really feel.”
“You don’t remember what it was like? Having a body?” Ten questioned the AI curiously.
“No, I don’t,” ZEN replied. “One day I simply was. Data and all.”
You took your mask off again to ask, “So you’re a sixth-generation AI, then, ZEN? Made from a donor human brain.”
“Yes, I am.”
“Liu, you got cut off after AI-bots,” Kun said. “What else were you going to say?”
“Or something we’ve never even thought of before,” Yangyang finished. “That’s the thing, right? We don’t know exactly what they were doing here.”
“So not ominous, kid, thanks,” Ten grumbled.
“Lab’s just around the corner!” Yangyang announced cheerily, which you knew was for you, as the others had the map in their HUDs.
You felt a tremor and heard a cracking just as Kun turned said corner, however, and lunged forward to grab his arm with two hands, pulling him back with as much force as you could. He jerked back right before a chunk of the ceiling came crashing down in his path, impacting with a loud thud.
The other two cursed in surprise as you were left clinging to Kun’s armored limb, his reflective face shield whipping around to look at you.
“Holy shit!” Ten breathed out. “Good reflexes, huh?”
“Are you okay, Kun?” You asked him.
He grabbed your hand that was still holding your mask, now a bit crushed between your palm and his armor, and wrenched it off of him, pushing your rebreather back up against your face again.
“I’m fine,” he deadpanned. “Are you okay?”
Kun was still pressing your mask to your face, not letting you bring it back down to answer, so all you could do was nod.
“Don’t do that again,” he warned. “Understand?”
You tried to pull your hand down to argue, but he just tightened his hold, until the mask was pressing into the bridge of your nose a bit painfully.
“Understand?” He repeated sternly.
You simply huffed and stopped struggling.
“Good.” He let go of your hand.
You fell back in with Yangyang as your group went around the chunk of ceiling.
The robotics lab was a large room filled with, surprisingly, not a lot of robots. Not a single robot, in fact. You couldn’t tell what had made Yangyang so excited in the first place until he drew your attention over to a workstation.
“Here,” he offered a seat to you, and you were now sat in front of some schematics. “I took a peek at these yesterday but the Professor and I had to move on before I got to really get into them.”
You hesitantly set your mask down, and were pleasantly surprised that it wasn’t too bad to breathe in here. Didn’t smell great, but you’d probably live. Flipping through the translucent sheets stacked on top of each other, you quickly began piecing together what these were preliminary sketches of.
“These are concept sketches of a casing for a positronic brain…” you said. “But it doesn’t say what it’s supposed to go in. It’s just the casing.”
“Yeah, that’s what I thought too.” Yangyang pulled it back towards himself. “I don’t know why they felt the need to reinvent the wheel, though. We already have positronic brains this size and shape, and the casings work just fine. And those things go in all sorts of places that human ones don’t. Radiation exposure, the bottom of the ocean, active volcanoes, black holes, you name it. I don’t know what they would have needed this casing to do…”
“This place is really empty.” You looked around again. “Shouldn’t there be… a lot more?”
“Maybe they didn’t get to burn it like they did the other lab,” Ten suggested. “They got interrupted by something.”
“The Skippers?” You asked.
“Yeah,” he nodded. “They were already cleaning house for some reason—either they knew the UHN were onto them, knew the Skippers were coming, suddenly grew a conscious, whatever—started to destroy the evidence, then got interrupted by the Skippers before they could finish the job.”
“But what did the Skippers want?” Yangyang tilted his head. “They’re not exactly known for their love of technology. Unless they were here to kill the heretics or something.”
“And they just happened to find a secret UHN experimental facility?” Kun countered doubtfully.
“Maybe they heard the same rumors our guy did.”
“Yeah, you want to say that to his face? That he gets us the same intelligence as Skipper defectors in stolen Fishead ships?”
You perked up at this information. This was the first you’d heard of the aliens in the halls not piloting ships made by their own kind. Skippers were wary of any technology not made by other Skippers, considering it to be blasphemous—they considered their own technology to be holy, the ideas and directions being gifted to the inventors directly by their gods. Therefore, technology made by any other species was sacrilege. Skippers using another species’ ships was certainly… fascinating.
“They were in K’llor ships?” You clarified. While the Skippers’ name for themselves was impossible for humans to pronounce, the endonym for Fisheads was easy enough.
“Yes, there’s no evidence there were any Skipper ships here. Only the two Fishead pods outside,” Kun confirmed.
“And… where exactly is here?”
“This is a blacked out UHN research facility on an artificial dwarf planet. Officially, it has no name, since it doesn’t exist. But unofficially, the few people at the UHN who do know about it, call it Aegeum.”
“The planet or the facility?”
“Both. There’s nothing here except the facility.” He had meandered over to the station you and Yangyang were at, and picked up your rebreather from the countertop. He sighed, “You cracked it…”
You looked at where he was holding it up to the light, and there was indeed a crack in the outer shell.
“Oh. Sorry. I’ll get another from Dejun later.” You stood up, looking around the room. “Ten said you found more ‘toys,’ Yangyang. It sounded like you had actually found robots. It wasn’t just one notepad, was it?”
“Dejun’s right, you’re not an idiot.” Yangyang beamed at you, leading you over to the back of the lab, where there was another door. He pulled it open, revealing a storage area of some kind. There were cubbies of different sizes, some empty, and some filled with what looked like half-built robots. Or, half-taken apart robots.
“What is this? A robot chop shop?” Ten called from where he had peered in from the doorway.
“No way these things were being used for spare parts,” Yangyang snorted.
Your eyes skimmed over some of the models, reading their serial codes as you went. SPD, QT, TN, MX, EZ, NDR. None of them had any power source, that much was clear. They were just… there.
“No…” You muttered, looking at the parts from each of them. “I would almost call this a museum…”
“These are ancient,” Yangyang agreed. “But also, who would put a museum in a broom closet in a secret experimental facility on secret fake dwarf planet?”
“That was my thinking.” You looked into the NDR model’s lifeless eyes. “It sort of looks like… someone was learning about robots? Taking apart old ones to see what makes them tick.”
“Yeah!” The roboticist nodded. “It reminds me of when I was kid and I’d take apart old watches and phones and anything else I could get my hands on, just trying to figure out how it worked.”
“Why would someone in a state-of-the-art UHN robot lab need to learn about hundred-year-old robots like a child?” Kun questioned, following the two of you in.
“Don’t know,” Yangyang admitted. “I doubt someone had their actual kid here.”
“All of the bodies were adults.”
“Right.”
The four of you continued scouring the robotics lab, and as you were inspecting another notebook of calculations about energy supply for a robot, you let out a huff.
“Does anything else feel off to you guys about what we’re finding?” You called out to them.
“Aside from the everything?” Ten retorted from where he had been sat at the one computer remaining, not guessing the password for fear of erasing any data on it. ZEN was currently working on that.
“Well, yeah, but the food that the ag bubble had modifications to make… there’s no indication that anything was being made that required anywhere near that sort of energy intake. Positronic brains have only gotten more energy efficient since those old models.”
“Y/N’s right,” Yangyang sighed. “AI actually takes more energy than robots, in the grand scheme of things. We’ve gotten less energy efficient, overall.”
“Team Two,” Kun’s voice was a bit muffled as he checked in with the others. “Status, Team Two?”
They all paused as they listened, and Kun nodded along. Finally, he responded, “Alright, keep on it. We’ll recap an hour before mess.”
“They find anything?” You inquired.
“Maybe.” Was all you got.
“ZEN got it,” Ten announced, drawing everyone into a huddle around the screen.
An asynchronous fragment of ZEN had been plugged into the computer, since you all were unsure of exactly what was going on in there, there was a risk of a synchronous fragment transmitting any number of issues back to the rest of ZEN’s systems. With the fragment plugged into the computer being completely self-contained, it could only be reconnected with the rest of his data in the Vision’s system, where his main control nexus was. Which meant that the fragment in the facility computer was currently mute, limited to the system he was in.
The computer had been unlocked, and the soldiers around you immediately groaned as a menu written entirely in Outspacer appeared.
“Of fucking course it’s in the dead alien language, just like the rest of the building,” Ten cursed, pushing the chair back away from the computer. “Alright, Y/N, it’s all yours.”
“How long was this place running, again?” You asked curiously as you and Ten swapped.
“They finished constructing the planet nine years ago, opened the facility a year after that,” Kun answered. “Why?”
“Just thinking about how hard it’d be to not only keep all this secret for so long, but also teach all the people who worked here to be fluent in a dead language with enough proficiency that they could perform ground-breaking research in it.”
“You wouldn’t have to,” Yangyang replied as you began keying through the menu options.
“What do you mean?”
“Not everybody has to be fluent in it, especially not to a level of technological proficiency. Not if you have robot scribes who are. You just need one person who knows it and is good with robots, then they can make an Outspacer dictionary to install into however many robots they want. Then your humans can dictate in standard human, the robots can transcribe in Outspacer, and as long as your humans know enough to not mistake the furnace for the bathroom, you’re set.”
“They wouldn’t be able to read their own notes,” Ten pointed out.
“The robots would translate it back,” Yangyang replied casually. “And I’m sure you’d pick some up eventually after eight years.”
Kun interjected, “That’s not a bad idea but we haven’t found any robots other than the old models you just saw.”
“I mean, if I was trying to get rid of all the evidence of my evil science experiments, first thing I’m destroying after the evil science experiments themselves are the things that know how to read all my notes about my evil science experiments.”
“Great, all we have is a bunch of theories about why we have no evidence and no actual evidence,” Kun sighed. “Y/N, what does the computer say?”
“It looks like the start menu, there’s a few options, but they go into a lot of subfolders. It’s sorted by department, though. Robotics, Synthetic Biology, Administrative, Support, Facility—I think that one’s just like the general building records maybe? Like, not related to any experiments. Probably repair and maintenance records. I don’t know, it’ll take a while to go through all of this.”
“Even with ZEN’s help?” Kun offered.
“He’ll need to be able to read Outspacer first,” you sighed. “His translations yesterday weren’t the best.”
“He only had the Professor’s notes and his own algorithm to work with. He’ll be a quick study if you give him the right material.”
“Then yeah, it should be a lot faster to find more relevant stuff with his help.”
The captain nodded resolutely. “We’ll get you and the Professor on it when we get back to camp.”
Back at camp, your teams exchanged reports on your investigations for the day. Kun filled the others in on what you did—and didn’t—find in the robotics lab, then all eyes were on the others.
“I found some traces of organic material,” Dejun announced. “A very small—”
“We got people, and we got robots,” Kunhang said definitively, setting off Yangyang and Ten into speculative chatter.
“It could’ve been paper for all we know!” The doctor tried to quell the fast-paced conspiracies flying around the group. “‘Organic material’ is meaningless, alright? I won’t be able to tell you anything more until I can get it back up onto the Vision and into some proper equipment. My field scanner here isn’t equipped for intergalactic CSI, it’s to keep you all from dying.”
“There’s enough of a sample for analysis?” Yangyang’s eyes were glittering with excitement.
“I think so.”
He turned to Kun. “Well when can we get that sample back on the Vision, Captain?”
“Not yet.” Kun shook his head. “We still have no clue why the Skippers were here. I don’t like that they apparently knew about this place before we did.”
“Should we check out their ships tomorrow then?” Ten suggested. “See what we can find there?”
“Yes. I want you, Wong, and Liu on that tomorrow.” Kun turned back to Dejun, “Xiao, are you finished with the lab? Or do you need more time?”
“I’m done.”
“You, ZEN, and I are going to clear the building again. See if we can reconstruct the fighting from the beginning.”
“Yes, sir.”
That just left you and the Professor. You looked between him and Kun expectantly.
“Y/N,” Kun said your name tersely, crossing his arms over his chest. “Stay here and review the Professor’s notes on Outspacer.”
“All day?” You couldn’t help but blurt out. “How voluminous are his notes?”
A few of the others snickered.
“Very. Might even take you a few days, if we’re lucky.” He clapped his hands. “Dismissed. Get ready for mess, everyone.”
“So,” Ten sat down next to you at the campfire, handing you your dish. “You and the captain are on a first-name basis?”
You furrowed your brow, looking between him, your food, and where Kun was talking to the Professor and Dejun at the entrance of his tent, then back to Ten. “Well, yes, I suppose. You’ve all asked me to address you informally, except the Professor.”
“You know, I forget that his first name isn’t actually Captain,” Kunhang plopped down on your other side.
“Me too,” Ten agreed, accepting the second bowl of food that Kunhang had brought with him.
“Is it a problem?” You inquired as you stirred up your chili.
“Not at all.”
“Just…” Kunhang trailed off as he seemed to be thinking of the right word. “Fascinating.”
“What’s fascinating?” Yangyang had wandered over, already shoveling food into his mouth.
“Grown up stuff,” Ten replied dismissively.
The roboticist rolled his eyes, sitting down next to Kunhang. “Says the three who were just whispering like tweenagers at a sleepover.”
“I’m just sitting here!” You tried to defend yourself.
“If it walks like a duck and talks like a duck—”
“Ducks don’t talk?”
Ten and Kunhang laughed as Yangyang stuck his tongue out at you.
“Yes, very mature behavior from the man who was just trying to prove that he could be included in conversations with adults,” you snorted.
Kunhang shook his head. “She’s got a point, kid.”
“You’re falling in with the wrong crowd, Y/N,” Yangyang clicked his tongue. “These two are bullies, you know.”
“All of you are ridiculous and I’m tired of this,” you declared. “Yangyang, stop having a complex about your youth and inexperience, they’re calling you ‘kid’ as an affectionate nickname to show that they accept you as part of the unit. Ten and Kunhang, it’s not a big deal that Kun told me to be informal with him.”
“That’s the grown up stuff?” Yangyang said in disbelief as the other two laughed even harder. “You guys really are pre-teens.”
“Way to deflect,” Ten snickered.
“And really, do you think we’d survive calling the captain that?” Kunhang added.
“What are you calling me?” Kun’s voice suddenly entered the conversation, and all four of you startled before turning to look at him. He was standing behind you, arms crossed over his chest as he focused his gaze down at Kunhang specifically, an eyebrow raised.
Kunhang looked around at the other three of you, panicked, but there was no way you were going to help him now. The Marine gulped before scrambling to answer, “We only ever address you with the utmost respect, sir, of course, sir. Captain. Sir.”
Kun’s very obviously did not believe him, but apparently decided to let the matter go. “Clearly. As you were, Corporal.”
The others got their dinner and sat around the fire as well, various conversations cropping up here and there. At the conclusion of mess, you helped Ten and Kunhang with cleaning up as before, then bid them goodnight. Yangyang and the Professor were still up tending to the fire and chatting, and you looked around for the other residents of camp. Dejun must have already retired to your tent for the night, but there was one in particular you were looking for. This morning, Kun had told you to find him after mess tonight, and you had apparently lost him at some point.
There was a soft glow from inside his tent, however, and with the Professor still out here, you figured that would be a pretty good place to start. The front flap that acted as a door of sorts wasn’t clipped open as it usually was during the day, but it wasn’t zipped up like it was at night or when whoever was inside needed privacy. There was definitely a lamp on inside, though, so you hesitantly grabbed the edge and parted it, calling out softly as you peered in.
“Kun? Are you—” Your eyes immediately landed on where Kun was laying on his cot on his front, his back to the door. Dejun was sat on a container next to him, one of his medic packs at his feet. Kun was holding up the hem of his shirt to allow access to his lower back, and when Dejun turned around to face you, his shoulders had shifted enough so that you could see a med-pod attached to the captain’s skin. You immediately knew you weren’t supposed to see this, trying to scramble out as fast as possible as they both were now looking at you intensely. “Sorry! Sorry! I’ll go!”
“Y/N.” Kun’s tone was commanding, despite his position.
You stepped in with an apologetic grimace already on your face. “I’m sorry, the tent was unzipped, I thought—”
“That was our fault.”
“You’re busy, I’ll go. It wasn’t important.” You tried to excuse yourself again.
“Xiao was just leaving.”
“No I wasn’t,” Dejun snorted.
“Now you are.”
“Captain, we’re not nearly finished.”
Kun looked over his shoulder at the doctor tersely. “It’s fine, Lieutenant.”
“Whatever.” Dejun clicked the med-pod off and stood up, setting it down on the container he’d been sitting on. He addressed you on his way out, “You see why you’re my best patient?”
You were silent until you and the captain were alone again, thoroughly convinced you were going to suffer the same fate that Yangyang did yesterday. “I’m really sorry, Kun—”
You were interrupted by a low grunt of pain that came from the man in front of you as he went to push himself up into a sitting position. Worried, you watched as he clutched his lower back and paused, hunched over as he sat at the side of his cot.
“Are you… okay?” You asked quietly.
He held up a finger for you to wait, and you did, watching he took a few deep breaths, then finally sat up straight, looking you in the eye. Kun took his hand from his back, clenching and unclenching one of his fists over his knees.
“The ceiling.” He said abruptly.
“Kun, are you—”
“The ceiling.” He repeated sharply. “We’re talking about the ceiling.”
You sighed and crossed your arms. “I didn’t think, I just did it, okay?”
“Y/N. Not only are you a civilian, whose safety we are responsible for, not the other way around, but I was wearing armor graded for that kind of impact, you were not. I would have been fine if it had hit me. You would not have been.”
“I know,” you insisted.
“You inspected my armor just yesterday, you know the material it’s made of, and that there’s nothing wrong with it. I would have been fine. A little winded, maybe a bruise, but fine.”
“I know, I know,” you repeated, frustrated that you weren’t able to articulate why you did what you did.
“So, did you need something?” Kun asked, his voice sounding a little strained.
“Uhm, you told me to find you after mess, but Dejun was clearly doing something important, so I’ll leave and go get him for you.”
“Oh, right, I said I’d tell you about Dura-Jil.”
“It can wait.”
He stooped over a little and grabbed at his back again. “No, it’s fine.”
“You… don’t look fine,” you said, wincing empathetically.
“I’ll be fine,” he replied dismissively.
“What’s wrong? What was Dejun treating?”
He paused, and you weren’t sure if it was to ponder his answer, or to collect himself from the pain that he was clearly experiencing. After a moment, he finally answered, “The skeletal enhancements I had mentioned before, they weren’t entirely successful.”
“They’re causing you pain.” You surmised, then added hesitantly, “Or failing entirely?”
“Just some pain between tune-ups. They didn’t quite expect us to last this long when they gave us them.”
“That’s… horrible.” You shook your head, brow furrowing angrily with this knowledge. “They can’t fix it?”
“Not without putting me behind a desk for the rest of my career.” He took a deep inhale then exhaled through his nose. “If I’m lucky.”
“How often do you need ‘tune-ups?’”
“Every couple years or so. Had to miss my last one with this mission, so Xiao’s been having to do more treatments than usual.”
“And how frequently is that?”
“Nightly.”
“You’re in pain right now, Kun,” you declared softly, feeling a lump growing in your throat as you watched him clearly trying and failing to hide it from you. “If I can’t go get Dejun, will you let me finish it?”
He looked up from the ground to you. “Hm?”
“He left the med-pod here. You tell me about Dura-Jil, and I’ll finish up giving you your treatment,” you bargained.
For a terrifying moment, you thought he was about to say no. But instead, the captain just sighed and laid back down on his cot on his front. You picked up the med-pod and sat down where Dejun had been before. The canister was half-filled with a clear liquid still, and you couldn’t see the needle end. He shuffled around to grab the back of his shirt and pull it up just enough to give you access to the middle of his back. You could see where the last injection had been, a small circular impression in the middle of his spine showing where the injector had locked on.
Sliding the circle back into the same place, you looked up at Kun’s face. He wasn’t holding his breath, or staring off into the distance. Instead, he was peering over his shoulder at you. Not at the injector in your hand, but at you.
“What?” You flicked your eyes between him and the device. “Do you want a countdown or something?”
“If you need one,” he replied noncommittally.
You pressed the button on the device, and heard the distinct click signifying that the injection had started. He didn’t even flinch at the needle going in, and you pulled your hand back as you looked up to meet his eyes again.
“You seem unperturbed by this,” he commented.
“So do you.”
“Like I said—” he settled his chin to rest on his forearm. “Nightly. So what do you want to know about Dura-Jil?”
“Whatever you want to tell me,” you replied. “I mean, I kind of have the general idea, I think, but what was it actually like being there as a kid?”
“It wasn’t some lawless free-for-all wasteland, I can tell you that much.” Kun paused as if to think, then continued, “I had parents, and friends, and had a childhood probably pretty similar to yours, whatever it was like.”
“Huh.”
“I also learned to drive a Geck at twelve instead of a normal car, knew how to spot fake UHN munitions by fourteen, and me and my friends’ idea of a good time was hotwiring whatever black market Fishead pods or Dumbo quadships we could get our hands on and taking joyrides to blast new craters into one of the moons.”
You chuckled, able to hear just the slightest hint of fondness in his tone for his rambunctious youth. “Were all your friends human?”
“One Phaser, but Dura-Jil was still mostly human back then. Just a lot of corrupt humans.”
“And it’s completely breathable atmosphere for humans?”
“Yep, very similar atmospheric composition to Earth, that’s part of why it was chosen for the first colony,” he confirmed. “It’s a bit further from Sol-X than Earth is from the Sun, though, so you’ve got to bundle up while you’re there. Perpetual winter, at least by Earth standards.”
“What about the sky? Is it blue like Earth?”
“Closer to an indigo. Something about the scattering and the gases. I was shocked when I came to Earth and realized how blue a blue sky was actually supposed to be.”
“Why did you go to Earth? Why did you leave Dura-Jil?”
The injector clicked again then, signaling that it had finished. You looked back down and saw the canister was empty.
“It’s late,” Kun declared, removing the empty med-pod from his back himself. He turned onto his side with a soft grunt, propped up on an elbow as he held the device out to you. “Give that back to Xiao, will you?”
You accepted it, standing back up. “Of course. Thank you, Kun.”
“Goodnight, Y/N.”
“Goodnight.”
When you left Kun’s tent, you nearly tripped over the Professor sitting on his pack just outside of it.
“Oh! Sorry!” You apologized.
“Huh?” He looked up from his notes as if he had just noticed you. “Oh, Y/N, I thought it was Xiao in there.”
“No, uh, just me. Goodnight, Professor.”
Back in your own tent, you held the empty med-pod out towards Dejun. “Here…?”
He raised his eyebrows in surprise as he sat up, letting you drop it into his palm. “Captain finished it himself?”
“Not quite,” you sighed, sitting down as you watched him put it back into one of his packs. “I asked him to let me administer it since he had sent you away before you could finish.”
“Well thanks.” He laid back down onto his cot. “Might need you to guilt him into doing that more often.”
“You make it sound like a bad thing.”
“Y/N, he needs it. I don’t know how much he told you about it, but it’s good that he let you.”
“Will it shorten his lifespan? The enhancements degrading?”
The doctor breathed out low and slow, rolling over to face you. “How much did he tell you?”
“The UHN gave him minor skeletal enhancements that allow his body to support the weight of his armor. But when he was given them… the UHN hadn’t considered longevity and now the enhancements require adjustments or they cause him pain. He missed his last adjustment because of this mission so you’ve been administering pain treatments nightly.”
“So… a lot.” Dejun shook his head. “I don’t know. Like you said, the UHN didn’t expect him to last long, so they didn’t factor that into the enhancements, or anything else they did. So I don’t know what’ll happen.”
“How could humans do that to other humans?”
“Pretty easily, actually, if they think they’re doing the right thing,” he almost laughed. “I wish it weren’t so.”
“When can Kun get his next tune-up?”
“Whenever we’re done here, I hope,” Dejun mused, flopping onto his back. “We should be dropping you off at UHN Main after this, and that’s where it happens.”
“What more do you need to do here?” You asked. “How soon can we go? So he can get adjusted.”
“Don’t know. When he thinks we’re done here, I guess. Or if the Admiral calls us to something more pressing, but that would probably delay the adjustment for even longer.”
You gnawed on your bottom lip. “I wish I could help. I wish I could remember, be able to tell you all what was going on here.”
“Y/N, you’ve helped us plenty. You can read Outspacer, for fuck’s sake,” Dejun insisted. “And what did I tell you about stressing your injured brain?”
“Not do it,” you sighed. “And I’m not. I’m just… expressing frustration about it.”
“Yeah, and I wish I’d had another growth spurt or two,” he snorted. “Isn’t going to make me two meters tall anytime soon. Best thing either of us can do right now is sleep, okay?”
“You’re right, you’re right.”
“Always am.”
You laid down, staring up at the ceiling of the tent. “Goodnight, Dejun.”
He clicked the lamp off, plunging you into darkness. “Night, YN.”
⇢ next | series masterlist | blog masterlist
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𓂃𓈒𓍼ོ𓂃𓈒
rebuilding a relationship with chenle !!
𓍼ོ this is pt.2, you can read pt.1 here
a/n: what yall know about kun and chenle’s friendship 😒
fake text m.list ☁︎⋅
#viasdreams#nct#nct fake texts#nct texts#nct x reader#nct fanfic#nct imagines#nct dream#nct dream texts#nct dream fic#nct smau#nct dream smau#chenle#zhong chenle x reader#zhong chenle#chenle x y/n#chenle x you#chenle x reader#nct chenle#chenle fanfic#qian kun
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. . . when he needs a new wallpaper
#nct fanfic#nct texts#nct scenarios#nct reactions#wayv smut#nct drabbles#nct smau#nct headcanons#nct imagines#wayv fanfic#wayv fluff#wayv x reader#ten x reader#kun x reader#winwin x reader#xiaojun x reader#hendery x reader#yangyang x reader#wayv texts#chittaphon leechaiyapornkul#qian kun#liu yangyang#wayv xiaojun#wayv ten#wayv smau
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Nct fic rec’s
A collection of some of my favourite fics i have read that are mostly nct but i may add some other groups!
Includes fics/series, smaus, oneshots,drabbles, headcannons and time stamps
S - smut | SG -suggestive | F - fluff
A - angst | M - mature
All credits to the writers! If you would not like your work on here please lmk!
*lm still new to posting on tumblr please lmk if anything is or looks wrong*
(Im a sucker for family au so please expect alot of that here 😅)
Nct wish are not included!
Nct 127
Johnny Suh
Lee Taeyong
Little taste of heaven | M,F,A - @taelme
Part 1 | part 2 | part 3
R U Ridin? | F - @writemekpop
Taeyong is a mafia boss, and he hides it from you... but what happens when his secret gets revealed?
[Newly added] BF! Taeyong in your camera roll | F - @angeliqueiguess
[Newly added] 12:22pm | F - @gyeomsweetgyeom
Nakamoto Yuta
Dad!Yuta | F - @jwirecs
[Newly added] BF! Yuta in your camera roll | F - @angeliqueiguess
[Newly added] Moonstruck | F - @zeroseuniverse
Kim Doyoung
Heaven, fallen | M,F,A - @wincore
6-7am | F - @nctinthehouse
You were beautiful | F,A - @jaelvr
[Newly added] 2:29pm | F - @gyeomsweetgyeom
[Newly added] BF! Doyoung in your camera roll | F - @angeliqueiguess
Jeong Jaehyun
Kim Jungwoo
Hard to say goodbye | F - @by-soleil
1:18pm | F - @gyeomsweetgyeom
Part 2 ⬇️
8:25pm | F - @gyeomsweetgyeom
[Newly added] BF! Jungwoo in your camera roll | F - @angeliqueiguess
Mark and Haechan in dream down below ⬇️
Nct Dream
Mark Lee
Huang Renjun
Beat you at your own game | F - @cafelattaes
y/n has a crush on renjun, who's not that great with people. despite his standoffish nature, she makes an effort to be friendly. but things take a twist when she starts to ignore him.
[Newly added] You ask renjun to teach you chinese, hoping to gather some courage to confess to your crush | F - @ddolbyong
Part 1 | Part 2
[Newly added] BF! Renjun in your camera roll | F @angeliqueiguess
Lee Jeno
Lee Haechan
Na Jaemin
Zhong Chenle
Park Jisung
Wayv
Qian Kun
7:16am | F - @theficblog
[Newly added] BF! Kun in your camera roll | F - @angeliqueiguess
Ten Lee
Just for the night | F - @mae-gi-writes
[Newly added] BF!Ten in your camera roll | F - @angeliqueiguess
WinWin
BF! WinWin in your camera roll | F - @angeliqueiguess
2:16pm | F - @winwintea
11:39pm | F - @honeymark
8:44pm | F - @gyeomsweetgyeom
XiaoJun
BF! Xiaojun in your camera roll | F - @angeliqueiguess
Hendery
Please save Mr. Fishy | F - @solaris-amethyst
You're a vet and he's pleading with you to save his goldfish since you're the only vet he's visited that hasn't asked him if he doesn't just want to go and buy another goldfish for three dollars.
BF! Hendery in your camera roll | F - @angeliqueiguess
YangYang
Drunken souvenir | F - @blue-jisungs
Sounds of strings | A? - @meiideryz
yangyang is a man who would completely back off from people his friends like, but not this one.
[Newly added] BF!YangYang in your camera roll | F - @angeliqueiguess
[Newly added] This Is An Emergency! | F - @sungbeam
Units
Nct 127
Baby 127 calling dad on tour | F - @phoxphenex
Nct dream
Moon and enthusiasm | F - @handlemehyuck
Baby dream calling dad on tour | F - @phoxphenex
Boyfriend texts | F - @handlemehyuck
Orange peel theory | F - @hyuckswoman
7dream nicknames for their partners | F - @swee7dream
Dream on dreaming | F - @diorcities
[Newly added] Waking up with dreamies | F - @lelengerine
[Newly added] Soft spot | F - @jisungchan
don’t believe in love, but no one makes me feel like you do
when the moment hits them, that they’re in love with you
[Newly added] BF! Dreamies thinking reader cheated | A - @jwisun
WayV
WayV reaction to a pic of them sleeping | F - @tigermark
[Newly added] Making out with wayv | F,SG - @wayvchip
Misc
[Newly added] The serial lover | F,A,SG - @haechanhues
in which a girl farewells every boy she’s ever loved (or at least had romantic feelings for) in order to prove that her feelings for one particular boy are very real and unwavering.
#nct#nct imagines#nct 127#nct 127 imagines#nct dream#nct dream imagines#wayv#wayv imagines#johnny suh#lee taeyong#nakamoto yuta#kim doyoung#jeong jaehyun#kim jungwoo#mark lee#huang renjun#lee jeno#lee haechan#na jaemin#zhong chenle#park jisung#qian kun#ten lee#win win#xiaojun#hendery#yangyang
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꒰ 𝐀𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐒𝐈𝐀 ꒱ 钱锟
summary : after waking up from anesthesia, you're faced with a handsome stranger... who might not be all that unfamiliar after all
genre : fluff, kinda angst, kun x afab!reader tws : language, mentions of surgery (not specified for what), hospital/doctors environment author notes : she a wolf she a beauty and a beast she a wolf word count : 1.6k
you blinked a couple times, the fluorescent lights momentarily impairing your vision. a hand came up to block them, shielding you as you adjusted.
“it’ll be a little bright,” a woman’s voice echoed in your hollow mind. “you’ll be a bit sensitive for a while.”
you turned your head, a croaked groan leaving your lips. “my arm hurts.”
“it’s from the IV, we’ll give you something to take home with you for all the pain.” she smiled, running her gloved hand along the tape and checking your veins color. “i’m going to check your vitals one last time and go grab your guardian, okay?”
you swallowed, nodding but not hearing what she had been explaining after. however, she was a nurse, so you believed her.
she took her time to check you over, making sure that everything was normal enough for a post-operation patient. your vision, hearing, blood pressure, heart rate and breathing. and by how long it took (which was only a couple minutes in reality) you were convinced she not only had double, but triple-checked.
you could remember the moment before you were put under, but everything else was still a little hazy, as if it was a dream. you could barely even think about anything other than what was right in front of your face.
she had asked you to confirm your last name and date of birth, the hesitation making her stifle a smile.
“i’m going to go get him now,” she took her stethoscope off, hanging it around her neck like a snake would. “it’ll only take a minute, okay?”
“who?” you had asked, too late as she was already out of the room. you must’ve spaced out, trying to conjure up in your mind who she was talking about. “who are you getting?”
you stared at the wooden door for what felt like forever, contemplating what to tell the nurse when she came back with someone you’d never met.
you bit your lip, fidgeting with your fingers and picking at the skin until the door finally opened again.
your eyebrows came together, a familiar sense washing over you. you looked over the man at her side, and you swear you had to clench your teeth to keep your mouth from falling open; he was the most beautiful person you’d ever laid eyes on.
you know to each their own, but you wanted him to be your own. you couldn’t stomach the thought of another girl perceiving him even though as far as you knew you’d never seen him before. i mean, how could you forget such a face?
he had a bright smile plastered to his god-awfully-pretty features. he glanced down at the nurse. “she looks confused,” he laughed. “has she not fully recovered from the anesthesia?”
she hugged the clipboard in her hands close to her chest. “not yet it seems, she asked who i was getting earlier. it should wear off—we had to give her a slightly higher dose.”
so, she did hear you but, chose to ignore you? that was cruel, however a laugh threatened to escape your throat… maybe it was the hyper amount of drugs you were on.
maybe she hasn’t actually gone and got him (whoever he was) yet, maybe she had grabbed another nurse; a doctor; an anesthesiologist. but he didn���t look like a doctor, or anything of the sort, clothed regularly. he looked smart, but in other senses—non-medical.
nonetheless, you couldn’t help feeling like you knew him. somewhere in the back of your mind you knew you could conjure up his name, and you cursed yourself for forgetting someone so beautiful.
the nurse came back over to you after washing her hands, pulling the rolling stool up to your bed.
you leaned in. “how do i know him?”
she laughed again, but it wasn’t funny to you. you were starting to feel distressed, stupid even, because even she couldn’t understand how you’d forgotten him. she leaned in whispering. “your husband.”
shocked was the simplest word you could’ve used.
“this might bruise, but it’ll go away within a couple days. and, your memory will come back within the hour, okay?” she started to remove the covers from your body, your bare legs on display. “and, you can change back into your regular clothes now, i’ll step out.” she turned to the man. “just let me know when she’s ready and we’ll go over the post procedure process, and schedule her a follow-up appointment.”
“okay, sounds good.” he smiled as the nurse began exiting the room. “thank you.”
the clicking of the door rang out against the silence, and you swallowed the lump in your throat. your eyes must’ve been wide, eyebrows confused as you looked him over again.
“my what?” you finally spewed out.
“husband, y/n.” he smiled, walking over to you. “we got married two months ago. i’m a little hurt that you forgot the best day of my life.”
“i-i,” you began, watching as he picked your clothes up off the side table. “i don’t need help.”
“yes, ma’am.” he seemed a little taken aback, obviously amused. “whatever you want, love.”
you groaned as you willed your legs over the side. you were still a little skeptical, but it was starting to come back to you; how could you actually forget?
there was a feeling inside telling you that you’d been with him way longer than the two months, and his presence was starting to jog your memories—maybe that was the trick to getting them back. him. your presumed husband.
despite feeling determined too, you couldn’t even stand up, stumbling back over when you tried. he flinched towards you, but stopped himself, obviously wanting to respect your prior direction.
you didn’t want to give in—still a little uncomfortable with the whole thing. you wanted to make him turn around, but you feared it was him that would be doing all the work in a couple of seconds. mind over matter though, right?
the bed let out a loud crack when you tried to stand again, this time he wouldn’t (couldn’t) stand back and watch.
“i’m sorry,” he whispered, coming in front of you and grabbing your arms. “just let me help you.”
you bit your lip, being raised by his strong, yet gentle grip. “i promise there’s nothing to worry about.”
you nodded, feeling a sense of relief at his touch—one you didn’t know you could feel for him. “o-okay.”
“can you stand on your own now?” he asked, carefully letting go of your skin, but keeping them close in case you started to tip.
once he made sure you could, he reached down to your knees, holding the hem of the hospital-gown. you took his forearm within your fingers, non-verbally telling him to stop. your stomach was turning, but you trusted him? a feeling you don’t know where it came from.
“if i close my eyes, will that be better?” he glanced at you, soft eyes catching your perplexed ones. “i’ll do whatever you need, y/n.”
you nodded again, not really sure what to say. how would he know what he was doing with closed eyes? how could he feel so strongly towards you that he was prepared to do anything? but, he did as promised, fingers accidentally grazing your torso when he dragged the fabric up.
the touch, however, sent you reeling, and suddenly you could remember a little over 6 months ago when he proposed. the night you cried like a baby, the man of your dreams down on one knee in front of you.
the whole situation was also now starting to get on your nerves. why’d you forget? why’d it all start coming back with his lingering touch? why’d you have to get a case of amnesia? why couldn’t you just remember? you really wanted to.
he kept his eyes closed, reaching to the clothes and feeling for your shirt. he found it, holding it up. “right way?” he asked. you hummed in response, helping it over your head. this time, as he adjusted the hem, his hands held your waist, twisting the fabric. but, it reminded you of further back, when you made him slow dance with you on the second date—even before you’d ever kissed—your arms draped around his neck, bodies swaying in a gentle rhythm.
you remember enough to know how you felt about him. you remember enough to know you loved him eternally.
“kun…” his eyes shot open, hands stilling in their spot. “i’m sorry.”
he grabbed you further. “why?” he asked, genuinely confused by your apology. you had nothing to be sorry for, he was only joking when he said he was hurt by your medically-caused amnesia. it happens. he knew you’d never be able to really forget him. “why are you sorry, my love?”
you put your arms around his neck, embracing him in a tight hug. a long overdue hug. you pulled your head away, feeling a shiver down your spine when his hands stroked along it soothingly. you kissed the side of his mouth, causing a gentle smile.
“i didn’t mean t-to. i forg—“
“don’t apologize.” he interrupted. “you remember now.”
how could you ever really forget?
“yeah,” you laughed. “it’s all coming back to me.”
he pressed his lips to yours, and you urgently recognized fine-details that you’d engrained to memory. little things about him and your life that you could never discard as irrelevant—everything about him was relevant to you. you loved him, and part of love meant knowing it all. knowing the gorgeous and down-right nasty about each other, but still seeing them in the same light. and, you’d already learned everything about him, as he did you, vowing to commit your life to each other; and the next one, and the next one. forever and ever. for better or for worse. through sickness and health, poverty and wealth.
‘till death do us part.
reblogs, likes and comments are greatly appreciated! thank u!
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#(˚ ༘ 🦕𖦹) soph’s fics ᡣ𐭩#kpop#kpop requests#kpop writing#kpop imagines#kpop oneshots#kpopidol#kpop bg#cpop#wayv#nct wayv#nct ff#nct drabbles#nct fluff#nct fanfic#nct x reader#nct u#nct imagines#nct angst#nct scenarios#wayv x reader#wayv imagines#wayv kun#wayv fluff#wayv fanfic#wayv reactions#qian kun#nct#nct requests#nct reactions
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break up with your girlfriend, i'm bored | qian kun
idol!kun x afab!reader
synopsis. You know exactly what you’re doing. You’ve got your sights set on Kun, your flawless, "stuck-up" senior with his perfect life and girlfriend — yeah, he’s off-limits. But that little detail? It won’t stop you. One dance, all teasing glances and charged tension, and suddenly, his eyes are focused on yours. Break up with your girlfriend, your look seems to say, I’m bored. He knows the risks, knows exactly what it would mean if someone caught on. But with you? There’s a thrill he can’t ignore, a promise of something just dangerous enough to be worth the fallout.
genre. forbidden romance, smut, angst
warnings. noncon elements (kun kissing reader out of the blue), emotional manipulation, infidelity, protected sex, fingering, handjob (if you don’t blink), explicit language, spitting, pussy eating
word count. 5,802
“I am not a homewrecker,” you defended yourself to Karina, a junior of yours, after she caught you looking with heart eyes to your senior, Kun. “He’s just so… charismatic. It makes me wonder how Hyeyeon pulled him.”
Hyeyeon used to be a trainee at SM Entertainment but left because she didn’t make the cut for aespa. You, on the other hand, debuted as a soloist the same year WayV debuted, just a few months later. Ever since your trainee days, you have been close to the aespa members as well as other trainees but never Hyeyeon.
Because she has who you want.
“Yeah, just keep saying that to yourself until you come to your senses,” Karina rolled her eyes. She’s always been the one to remind you that Qian Kun is taken by an ex-trainee while the other three would just feed your delusions and support you, equally problematic like you.
“Just listen to me, will you?” You sighed, sitting down at one of the chairs at SM’s cafeteria while Karina followed your motion. “It was just a glimpse… I haven’t seen him in months and whenever we have interactions, we just go, ‘Hi, Hello!’ and never have longer conversations. I’m not tempting him to cheat with me!” The last sentence came out as a whisper rather than a shout because you were afraid people from your own company would hear your conversation with the girl in front of you.
Before Karina could condemn you again, Kun walked into the doors of the cafeteria with his left arm around Hyeyeon’s waist. Both of them were giggly and looked deeply in love with each other. Kun made eye contact with you and nodded at your direction while you did the same, feeling sheepish and envious all of a sudden. Wishing that it was you he was holding.
“It’s been four years since your obsession with him began, Y/N. Looks like you better move on ‘cuz it looks like they aren’t separating anytime soon,” Karina teased, smiling widely at your semi-distraught state after having eye contact with your senior, who you dearly love, who was with his girlfriend, who you dearly hate.
“Whatever,” was the last thing you said to Karina before leaving her to head towards your practice room.
Earlier today, you were informed by your manager that some artists would borrow your practice room for the rest of the week because their room is under renovation. Of course, you happily responded to your manager but you didn’t know who the artist was. Or who they are.
Break up with your girlfriend, cuz I’m bored…
The lyrics of the song filled the whole room as you started practicing your special performance scheduled for next month. You decided to perform Ariana Grande’s song which is very fitting for your situation right now.
You swayed and rolled your hips to the side followed by a kneeling position where you bent and humped the floor sensually, clearly immersed by the song and the man you were thinking of. Unbeknownst to you, Kun entered your practice room while you were deeply focused on dancing, slightly embarrassed to see you touching every part of your body sensually and even humping down the floor. To him, you owned the song.
He wanted to exit the room quietly but his body was frozen in place. His eyes scanned you head to toe, your movement, facial expression, and even your breathing. He was skimming you thoroughly and felt this unexplainable ache in his chest for looking at another woman the way he would look at his girlfriend.
By the end of your dance, you noticed an awkward Kun standing near the door, watching you. At first, you immediately bowed to show respect to him and greeted him with a smile to which he replied with warmth.
“Kun-oppa! Nice to meet you!” You greeted, hoping that this is the start of a finally long conversation with your lovely senior.
“Y/N. Your dancing was so good! I almost thought that I might distract you,” he cursed to himself because if anyone was distracted, it would be him and not you. If only you could see the way his gaze lingered at your body and face, he thinks that you’d probably be weirded out by him.
“Oh, I didn’t notice you while I was practicing so yeah…” You sheepishly replied, eyes glued to the floor, not wanting to meet Kun’s gaze that, even if you cannot see him eye to eye, intimidated you so much.
Just as when you thought it would be the last conversation you’ll have with your beloved senior for the day, your mind wandered off to something that you know you will regret afterwards… but you want to at least try.
“Sunbae…” you trailed. Your eyes now bravely meet his. Naught was evident in your current state as you slowly walked closer to Kun.
The man started getting nervous as you stopped near him. The only barrier the both of you have is at least one inch of air and clothes. “Yes..?” He asked tensely. Kun wanted to put more space between the both of you but his body won’t budge to what his mind wants. He stood there, extremely close to you and his anxiousness to what you are about to say was clear in his demeanor.
“Would you like to watch me dance again? And then you can give me advice afterwards.” Your tone was achingly flirtatious and you winced after that came out of your mouth. You hoped that he’d agree while he hoped that his members would come sooner or he’d accept your offer and make more immoral thoughts about you… while he has a girlfriend.
It took a while for Kun to respond to what you had just said. He closed his eyes for a moment and inhaled deeply, his members still didn’t arrive even though the situation he is in right now needed them.
And he answered you with something both of you knew would change the trajectory of your relationship with each other.
“Sure, it’d be my pleasure.”
It was indeed his pleasure to see you dance upfront than by the mirror. Kun watched in awe as you perfected the moves, adding sensual touches here and there which made him feel guilty.
But why would he feel guilty if he wasn’t interested in you?
You can hit it in the mornin’, like it’s yours
I know it ain’t right
But I don’t care
Break up with your girlfriend
Cause I’m bored
You mouthed the lyrics while pointing to Kun, walking closer to where he was seated. While you were slowly dancing your way to Kun, he cannot deny the nervousness filling up his whole body, watching your next move. Guiltily waiting for what is next. Hoping for something to happen. Guiltily.
At this point, you weren’t in your usual self because you were too preoccupied with the song. You were feeling the song so much that you didn’t notice you were humping Kun’s lap rather than the floor. That you were seductively singing your lyrics to his ear. That you were breathing heavily while singing. That he can hear everything. And that he can feel you the way you are feeling the warmth of his body right now.
“Break up with your girlfriend,” was your final verse and you were still in his lap, sitting in his tough thighs that are now clenched underneath you. Oh, how you loved the feeling of your beloved senior’s lap. You enjoyed every second of it and you highkey hope he did too.
You and Kun spent an entire minute looking at each other’s eyes, waiting for who will give in first. Waiting for who will initiate something. Waiting for something.
“So… how was it, oppa?” You bit your lower lip, slowly sitting beside Kun who was clearly having a hard time processing what had happened to him and his precious lap. “Kun?”
When he didn’t answer you the first time, you got worried, thinking that he was actually as stuck up as other people and as the media portrayed him to be and that he wasn’t ready to experience that with you, his junior who he did not have any communication with whatsoever before it happened.
But what he did startled you more than how you startled him. He grabbed your head forcefully and made your lips meet each other. You moaned at the sudden contact, touching his shoulders and sitting back to his lap and grinded harshly on his now prominent boner. Your tongues started battling for dominance and his hands are now on your ass, squeezing it hard making you whimper.
“Kun…”
“You like this huh, Y/N?” He groaned, his kisses moving down to your neck where he left sloppy kisses. “You like riling your seniors up, Y/N? You like it when you act like a slut in front of your seniors?” He was degrading you and you loved every second of it.
“Only… hmn… for Kun…ah!” You replied breathily, his hands now groping your chests. He was so close to removing your shirt when you heard the loud noise of his members heading to your practice room. Only then did you remember that they were supposed to practice right after you, leading you to push your body off of Kun. Hurriedly, you left your own practice room while Kun sat there, realizing what he had done.
“Shit,” he muttered under his breath.
“What have I done?” You were walking back and forth in front of the aespa members, biting your nails and your eyebrows furrowed. It was the week after your sinful interaction with your long-time crush who has a girlfriend and you cannot sleep at peace every night thinking of what you had done, of what you had made him do. It was all your fault and your conscience is eating you up. You vividly remember how frantic you were to the remaining WayV members heading to your practice room that you bowed to them without making eye contact, because of the guilt that you had done something morally and ethically wrong with their leader.
“Well, if only you acted more like a mature woman, this wouldn’t happen,” Karina scolded you and you definitely deserved that for what you did.
“But think of it, Y/N-eonnie! It means he’s interested in you! ‘Cause he wouldn’t have done that if he wasn’t!” Ningning butted in, her smile was so wide you almost gave in to the thought that THE Qian Kun is interested in you.
“No! I tempted him… oh god.. I’m the worst human being ever! How can I face him again?! How can I face Hyeyeon again?” You’re now sitting on your room's floor, hair disheveled, clothes crumpled, and everything. Clearly, what had happened affected you so much that you were in a panic.
“So, what’s your plan?” Giselle asked, unbothered at your current state.
“I’ll just ignore him and then pretend that what happened to us never happened and… that it was all in our imagination! See?” You rambled like crazy, grinning idiotically while eyeing the four girls at your sofa.
“You can’t just ignore Kun… We have SMTOWN next week,” Winter amusingly replied to you.
“Fuuck,” you pulled your hair so hard they thought you were about to become bald. “What do I do?!”
The rest of the week before SMTOWN Concert was just you explicitly avoiding Kun to the point that even his members are asking him why you are acting weird around them. Kun just shrugged at them, knowing that he was the reason why you’re doing that but they have no right to know why because they will definitely look at him with disdain.
While you were busy going to places where Kun won’t go, he was busy trying to chase you to apologize and to have a proper closure about what had happened before. He confessed to himself that he gave in to you because you were so beautiful while you danced and he saw how immersed you were while dancing that it made him make out with you. He never told Hyeyeon what happened because he felt guilty the first few days but later on, it was replaced with his yearning for you to talk to him again, to greet him again like a senior as if nothing bad happened.
Kun never understood why he suddenly felt this way towards you after what the both of you had done but ever since, when you’re not looking or when you thought that he’s not around, he would steal glances and observe you from afar… slowly building up his forbidden liking for you. He hated every single thought of him corrupting and liking you while hurting Hyeyeon because everyone knows Qian Kun is smart, stuck-up, and perfect, until you came. You had affected him. You made his wall crumble and you made him feel things he isn’t supposed to feel towards someone that isn't his lover. You made Qian Kun a sinner.
Day by day, his love for Hyeyeon became colder but the girl was oblivious to her now distant boyfriend because Kun still acted lovey dovey towards her and made her feel warm and giddy. Though, he’d rather spend days chasing you than acting to Hyeyeon.
At that moment, Kun realized how much of an asshole he is for playing with Hyeyeon and for looking at you while his girlfriend wasn’t around. He felt like a dick because he couldn’t break up with his girlfriend, hating the fact that he’d hurt the woman he swore he’d marry before.
But oh well, turns out he wasn’t the only one having fun when he’s unavailable.
It was a sunny day right before SMTOWN, the artists were diligently doing their final rehearsal at the Sky Dome while Giselle begged you to go out and buy food with her for the other members. You agreed immediately because your rehearsal was finished an hour ago but you still stayed in hopes of seeing Kun perform on stage.
“What do you want, Y/N?” Giselle asked you, scanning the dessert aisle of the convenience store.
“I just want some corn dog and iced coffee. What ‘bout you? I’ll pay for everything,” you offered but before Giselle could celebrate you spoke again, “But you’ll go to the counter and do the talking, I’ll just give you my card.”
“Hah… seriously. You never fail to get my hopes up just to disappoint me,” Giselle complained but still managed to go to the counter with all of the food.
“You want free food or nah?” The girl just looked at you dejectedly.
“What’s with two coffees anyway?”
“I’m giving it to Kun…” Giselle noticed the way your eyes looked around the store, not wanting to meet her teasing gaze. “I know the look you’re giving me right now and I’m not loving it.”
“Yeah… ‘cuz what happened to avoiding him?”
“Look at his arms and tell me if you can ignore someone like him.” The girl just nodded in agreement to what you had said.
When the both of you exited the convenience store, you cannot help but notice a familiar figure at a coffee shop near the venue of the concert. You urged Giselle to follow you and observed the familiar figure, to see if you can recall who it was.
It was Hyeyeon with an unfamiliar guy, laughing together. He even kissed Hyeyeon’s temple and it was enough for you to realize that she had been cheating on Kun while he worked his ass off inside the stadium. Giselle looked at you worriedly, afraid that you might barge inside the coffee shop and attack Hyeyeon.
“Isn’t that the girlfriend of your crush?”
“Y-yeah… but if she’s cheating, why do it at a place near the stadium?”
“Ask your crush, not me. I just want to eat. Come on, Y/N. Karina and the others are waiting for us,” before you followed Giselle back to the venue, you took a couple of pictures of the two as a proof to show to Kun.
Of course, rather than feeling bad for the man, you thought of this as a chance to get him. To make him yours.
Backstage, you told the other girls the scene you saw with Giselle. At first, they told you not to jump to any conclusions because maybe they’re relatives, waiting for Kun to finish his rehearsals so they could meet. But something isn’t quite right and it’s bothering you.
“I will tell him about this!” You figured that this is the chance to talk to him again, to act innocent and show him a picture of his girlfriend being kissed at the temple by another man. To tell him that you’re just concerned for his relationship.
“How would you, though? If you go to their waiting room, everyone will be suspicious. You know how things get if a rumor gets out that you’re talking to Kun,” Winter tilted her head, her eyes scanning your face, waiting for your response.
“And that’s why we have Ningning!” You gleamed, looking at the youngest member with imploring eyes.
Ningning swallowed hard, evaluating the situation she’s in. She doesn’t want to be some catalyst for another person’s heartbreak but she wants you to shut up about Kun. In the end, she’s closer to you than she is to Hyeyeon and what is right is always with the ones closest to you.
She took a deep breath followed by a click of her tongue, “I can’t believe I’m tolerating you. If your fans knew about this, they’d go mad,” was what she said before heading to WayV’s waiting room to look for Kun.
The thought of your fans knowing your sinful escapade with your senior who has a girlfriend ignited the thrill in your heart you never knew you had. You are fully aware of how big the backlash can be if ever this gets out, of how you might potentially lose your job and be the most hated idol in the industry ever. But the excitement overpowers the fear of whatever the consequences of your actions can lead to. If it’s for Kun.
Ningning led Kun to the girls’ waiting room, urging the rest of her members to get out, leaving you and him alone.
“Kun-oppa…” Awkward tension filled the room. He wasn’t speaking to you and was just looking into your eyes indirectly from the mirror you are in front of. “Hi.” You bit your lip as your body started to feel hot from the presence of Kun.
“Are you avoiding me, Y/N?” Was all he needed to say for you to sit up straight and look back at him.
“Who wouldn’t?” You retorted, “After the thing I did to you… I felt bad.” And that you did. You genuinely felt bad for riling his mood up, for not stopping, for taking advantage of him.
“It’s not anyone’s fault, Y/N. I chose to do that with you,” Kun replied, patting the couch, urging you to sit beside him which you immediately conformed to. “Why’d you bring me here?”
Looking at his eyes almost made you forget the reason Ningning brought him here. But before dropping the big news, you first gave him the coffee you bought earlier for him, earning a small ‘thanks’ from him.
“I have something to show you,” you firmly said. This time, you were looking seriously into his eyes that he cannot fathom what you are about to tell. “But first, does Hyeyeon know it’s your last rehearsal today?” You winced at the sound of his girlfriend’s name from your mouth, feeling like the lowest being on Earth.
He found it weird for you to ask him about his girlfriend when you have an unexplainable tension between the both of you but he shook his head no.
With your hands trembling, you unlocked your phone and opened your gallery app to show him the images you took earlier of Hyeyeon and an unknown man, acting very intimate at the coffee shop near the stadium. “I saw them when me and Giselle went out earlier to buy snacks.”
At first, Kun frowned slightly, then his head leaned closer to your phone to get a better view of what you’re showing him. After looking at the photo for a minute, it seems to be engraved into his mind. His jaws clenched tightly and said nothing for a long time, just observing what was happening in the photo.
“That’s…” His voice became so low that you felt even hotter, sitting close next to him. You can tell that he was mad and disappointed at the thing you showed him. “Is this true?” He questioned you, his voice heavy with tension.
“Kun, I would never lie to you.”
Kun stared at the photo for a moment longer, his expression completely unreadable. Then, he let out a soft, unamused chuckle, running a hand through his hair. “So this is what she’s been doing,” he murmured, almost to himself.
“Kun…” You hesitated, your voice soft. “I’m sorry.”
He shook his head again in disagreement. “Thank you for showing me. I wouldn’t have known otherwise.”
You watched his fingers rake his hair again, his body seemingly sinking under an invisible weight. As you were closer in determining what he was feeling, his demeanor suddenly shifted from a betrayed man to something darker.
At the night before the concert, Kun couldn’t stop thinking about the photo you’d shown him. The image of Hyeyeon smiling and leaning into another man wasn’t just a betrayal—it was the perfect opportunity. He wasn’t proud of himself for thinking that way, but the guilt of his own infidelity had been gnawing at him, and now, for the first time in weeks, he saw a way to relieve himself.
When Hyeyeon showed up to his dorm, he was greeted with her lively demeanor and a kiss on the cheek. But he wasn’t having any of it. He wanted to end this quickly so that he could go back chasing you.
“Hyeyeon, who is he?” He asked, his phone now in front of Hyeyeon’s face. Her eyes welcomed the photo you took which is now on Kun’s phone.
His girlfriend’s smile faded and it was replaced by shock, her mouth slightly open. “Kun? I don’t know–He’s just a friend… Where did you even get this?” Her thoughts were all over the place and all she could think was how she could defend herself to keep Kun with her.
Kun inhaled sharply and licked his bottom lip, showing annoyance to the female. “Just a friend? Are you kidding me, Hyeyeon? Look at the way he’s touching you. Hell, he even kissed your temple!” He raised his voice in annoyance as Hyeyeon now started tearing up.
“Kun, I swear it’s not what it looks like. I would neve-” Before Hyeyeon could finish her sentence, Kun interrupted her.
His eyes showed his deep disappointment to his soon-to-be-former lover as if he was incredibly hurt from what she did. “Never? Because it sure looks like you would!” He pointed at the photo again. “I’ve been working all day and night, trying to keep our relationship stable despite everything, and this is how you repay me?” His tone cracked, filled with fabricated hurt, though inside, he was now unaffected by her betrayal.
“I’m sorry, Kun! I didn’t think that… that it would go this far.”
“You definitely did not think, Hyeyeon, because who would ever do that to their boyfriend? Huh? Do you even care about the efforts I made to keep you safe? The sacrifices?” His voice was sharp and clear, laced with hypocrisy from someone who isn’t innocent but wants to make her the guilty one. “I am more than disappointed in you, Hyeyeon. For me, you were my everything.”
Hyeyeon wanted to talk again, to defend herself. She wanted to make things right but Kun was having none of it. He was having enough of acting in front of her. “This won’t do, Hyeyeon.” He stated whilst shaking his head. “This won’t do. I think we have to end our relationship. We have to stop.”
Her eyes widened and she violently disagreed with what he had just said. “No please, Kun! Please give me another chance. Please!” She clasped her palms together in front of him, desperate for some sort of kindness Kun might give her.
“We’re over, Hyeyeon.” Was the last thing he said before escorting the woman out of his dorm.
The next day, news of Hyeyeon cheating on Kun spread like wildfire. A lot of the staff has sympathized with him, especially his members but he assured them that he is fine. That everything is okay and he can manage… which he definitely is, considering how he took his confrontation with Hyeyeon as a chance to make her guilty.
Right after your performance, you spent a moment backstage to observe the chaos of the staff running frantically in different directions. The hum of the stage’s booming bass reverberated through the walls, each thud is a reminder of the performer’s passion to be on stage, in front of their fans.
You then entered your dressing room which was dim and the fluorescents were flickering softly overhead. You were about to close the door to change when you saw Kun standing by the door, his chest heaving slightly as if he was running after you, afraid you’d avoid him again.
His eyes–dark and piercing–met yours and held them captive. The tension was unbearable and the silence was heavy. He then closed the door behind him and locked it. The sound of the door locking seemed to echo louder than it should have, making your breath hitch.
He turned to you and eyed you from head to toe, like the time he was watching you dance. “You were great out there,” he complimented you, walking closer to your current position.
“Thank you,” you bit your lower lip, eyes now avoiding his intense gaze. “What are you doing here?”
“I broke up with Hyeyeon,” he explained, his calm voice serenading your ears but you cannot help but hear the slight crack of his voice from the mention of his ex’s name.
You looked at him with wide eyes, head tilted to the side. “You what?”
“I ended it with Hyeyeon,” his voice was firm and sharp. “Because I couldn’t keep lying to myself. About her. About you.”
You blinked, trying to process what he had just said to you. Your emotions are now all over the place, your chest feels tight, and your thoughts are racing. “Kun, I–”
“You don’t get it, do you?” he interrupted your dialogue, his voice came out as a growl that sent shivers down your spine. He stepped closer to you, your clothes brushed into each other, and his gaze pinned you in place. “You’ve turned my whole life upside down, and now I don’t even know who I am.”
His confession hit you hard, leaving you breathless. Your legs weaken second by second because of him and what he’s doing to you. You tried to say something but nothing was coming out of your mouth.
He was just looking at your current state but Kun is trying so hard to contain himself. His jaw clenched, hands curling into fists at his sides as he disciplined himself in front of you. “I thought I had everything figured out, Y/N. But you came along and nothing makes sense anymore.”
You now took the courage to touch his arm. “Kun,” you whispered with your voice trembling. “I never meant to–”
“Don’t,” his voice cracked. “Don’t say you didn’t mean to, because we both know it’s not true.” His eyes were filled with overflowing emotion that you know is genuine and is making your heart ache.
“Then what do you want me to say? That I feel the same? That I’ve liked you for a long time? That I can’t stop thinking about you?”
You could feel the heat radiating off of him and instead of answering you, he closed the distance between you in two swift sides. He, now, can no longer contain his frustration as he gently held your face and crashed his lips against yours.
The kiss was rough and desperate, filled with everything the both of you couldn’t put into words at your current state. You gasped against his mouth, hands flying up to hold his shoulders as he pulled you even more closer to him. His fingers slid into your hair, holding you in place as the kiss deepened, his tongue sweeping past your lips to tangle with yours.
You pulled out to take a breath, your forehead rested against his. Kun’s hands moved to your waist, gripping you tightly, afraid you might disappear.
“Kiss me again,” you whispered, almost coming out inaudible but he complied. Your lips met his again and your right hand wandered downwards, towards his crotch. You were massaging his now hardened member just underneath his clothes, earning a groan from the man himself.
His hands slid down to your thighs, lifting you effortlessly onto the counter as his lips moved to your neck, sucking, kissing, and biting your sensitive skin.
“Ahh… Kun!” You gasped, both of your hands now busy with removing his pant’s zipper. Once his dick was out, you spat on your palm then moved to stroke it. You kissed him again while moving your hands up and down, giving special attention to his sensitive head, earning a groan from his lips.
“Oh, Y/N…” His hands roamed your body, slipping beneath your outfit to explore the bare skin of your thighs. When he reached the edge of your underwear, he hesitated, his dark eyes met yours in a silent question.
You nodded fervently, your body now filled with lust and all you can think about is his fingers inside yours. “Yes, please… Please, Kun,” you breathed out, removing your hands from his member, letting him kneel so that his face meets your womanhood.
His lips curved into a smirk as you spread your legs widely for him to see how much wetness has covered your underwear. “Excited, hm?”
“Please, just eat me out,” your pleading eyes met his and he groaned at the lustful sight in front of him. Your legs spread out nicely for him to take a good view of your covered pussy while your lipstick was smudged all over your face, and your hair now disheveled.
Your position is enough for him to remove your panty and throw it at the side. His thumb gently spread your wetness all over your pussy and his face inched closer to your heat. You were grinding on his thumb, moaning and whining for him to finger, suck–just anything he can do to you to relieve the arousal in your middle.
The world outside faded away as Kun slid two of his fingers inside you, his lips now sucking and licking your clit. Your eyes rolling to the back of your head, your hands gripping his hair tightly, and your legs now surround his head, pulling him even closer to you.
He fingered you fast and rough, your wetness and moans filled the whole of your dressing room. Kun was so turned on by you that his left hand now jerked his neglected member. His fingers curled into your g-spot while he spitted on your womanhood. “Fuck,” he bit his lower lip before diving into your pussy again. “You’re pussy’s so good for me, Y/N. It’s clenching my fingers so tight.”
“Oh, Kun! Right there, oh…” You weren’t listening to what he was saying, your mind now in euphoria as he added another finger, making you whimper. “Fuck! Kun!” His fast movements followed by the abuse of your clit from his mouth was enough for you to chant his name repeatedly and loudly, the music at the stage overpowering your noises. “Mmm… s’ close, Kun… let me cum, please," you tried your best to talk, the knot in your stomach aching to be released.
“Not yet, sweetheart. Need to feel your cum on my dick,” the way Kun said those sexual things ignited the fire inside you. Never in your whole life would you expect this senior of yours to say those explicit things to you, intensely.
He stopped fingering you, edging you in process and making you whine. “Shh, so impatient.”
Kun wrapped the condom he had prepared beforehand, to his member before grinding it on the lips of your sensitive, wet pussy. “Fuck…” He groaned, eyes now closed as he entered your womanhood.
He kissed you deeply while thrusting slowly, the squelching sound was so erotic that it turned him on more. Your insides clenched on his member, making him pound faster and harder into you.
Overwhelmed is an understatement on what you are feeling right now. Every nerve in your body had been set alight as you clung to him for dear life. Each of his thrust sends waves of pleasure crashing over you.
You didn’t care about what was happening in the outside world. There was only him–his touch, his breath, his whispered name falling from your lips like a prayer, and his member that’s rearranging your insides.
You clenched tight on him, your hands finding their way to his clothed back, scratching and holding for support. “‘m close… So close…” You murmured, eyes closed in ecstasy while Kun guided you through your release.
“Hmm, cum with me, sweetheart,” the sounds from the both of you became more desperate and the clashing of your skin to his filled the entire room.
When the tension finally snapped, it crashed over the both of you, leaving you trembling on Kun’s hold. His forehead rested against yours as you both struggled to catch your breath.
Kun pressed a kiss to your cheek, his hand cradling the back of your head as if to shield you from the weight of what had just happened.
“We can’t go back after this,” he said quietly, his voice still hoarse.
“I know,” you replied, your fingers tracing lazy circles on his chest. “But maybe… maybe we don’t need to.”
That was all Kun needed to hear from you. He cleaned you up and helped you sit on your dressing room’s couch.
The both of you knew that you’re not ready to have a conversation about your relationship right now but what you had said to each other earlier is enough for the both of you to feel okay, for now.
#kun smut#qian kun#qian kun x reader#wayv smut#wayv hard hours#kun hard hours#kun x reader smut#kun x reader#qian kun smut#wayv imagines#nct smut#nct hard hours#nct x reader#yangqism
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what wayv seeks in a relationship
GROUP ↬ ot6 wayv
WARNINGS ↬ none, pure fluff <33 maybe some angst
AUTHOR’S NOTE ↬ i did the wayv version !!! the dream one blew up and i'll be doing a 127 one soon, but i thought i'd post this in the meantime as well. although wayv is my ult group i feel like i struggle more with finding out their exact personalities and what they like. i hope this is sufficient enough for you all though <33
Qian Kun
kun doesn't believe in taking things lightly. he wants to make sure he's found the right partner before letting himself fall in love. he values a partner that finds traditional values important. someone who will always be there for him, not just when it's convenient. kun prefers someone who is grounded in reality rather than overly idealistic. he also needs a partner who makes him feel appreciated and understood. a partner who is easy-going is also a good balance to his more responsible nature, might also work well with him. someone that might encourage him to take risks and will be there to pick him up if he falls.
Chittaphon Leechaiyapornkul
ten places a lot of importance on establishing meaningful relationships. although he may not act like it, he's generally more reserved so he does appreciate a deeper connection. ten likes someone who will challenge him intellectually and is suited towards a partner that is open-minded and willing to explore new things. he's attracted to people who have something unique to offer in this life. ten values personal growth, so he would appreciate someone who is supportive of his journey towards self-actualization. sometimes it's difficult for ten to relax and enjoy the current moment, so he appreciates a partner that will help him find peace and serenity.
Dong SiCheng
winwin believes that a relationship isn't a passive commitment, but it's a way for both partners to learn, grow and develop as time passes on. he wants a partner who will understand his uniqueness and individualism. they must also really understand his sensitive side and the nuances of his personality. winwin appreciates a partner that will look out for him and make sure he feels heard. he may come off as aloof at times, but deep down winwin is a whirlwind of emotions, so he needs a partner that won't be overwhelmed by these intense emotions. since winwin is a free-spirit he values open-mindedness and independence in a partner.
Xiao DeJun
xiaojun strives to connect to people in meaningful ways. he wants to find someone who he can completely devote himself to, who also accepted him as he is and who respects his freedom. xiaojun also needs a partner who understands his sensitive nature. he is also attracted to someone who has a unique way of thinking about things. a partner who can provide a sense of stability and security is also something he looks for. he's not necessarily needing someone to meet his level of emotional intensity, but rather a partner who can provide a grounding presence that will make them feel at home. xiaojun is also drawn to those with very complex personalities.
Wong KunHang
hendery seeks constant growth, both individually and relationally. hendery needs a partner who can provide emotional support and understanding, since he often gets caught up in his own thoughts and feelings. he feels like he is often misunderstood by those around him, so one of the most important aspects to him is that his partner understands him. hopefully they understand his constant need for adventure and growth. hendery has a great sense of humor, so he wants a partner who can match his wit and also make him laugh. he doesn't necessarily need someone who matches his energy levels, but someone who encourages him to follow his passions and dreams.
Liu YangYang
yangyang dislikes mind games in a relationship, he wants a relationship that is genuine and honest. he's not averse to casual dating, just not his priority, since he prefers to form meaningful connections with those on the same wavelength as him. he has a low boredom threshold, so he needs a certain level of mental stimulation in order to be content, and someone who can push him outside of the box is good for him. yangyang may also sometimes find it difficult to stay on track so having a partner who can keep him motivated will benefit him in the long run. he also values those who are patient and trustworthy as he hopes his partner will allow him the time and space to open up.
TAGLIST ↬ @lyvhie @aquaphoenixz @ldh0000 @galacticnct @sharonxdevi
#nct imagines#nct fic#nct#nct x reader#nct scenarios#nct hard hours#wayv#wayv fic#wayv imagines#nct kun#nct ten#nct winwin#nct xiaojun#nct hendery#nct yangyang#qian kun#ten lee#nct dream imagines#dong sicheng#winwin#xiao dejun#xiaojun#kun#hendery#wong kunhang#yangyang#liu yangyang#nct wayv#wayv reactions#wayv ten
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qian kun & gn! reader about summer heat, sharing a bed, non-sexual intimacy, roommates who are “just friends,” lowercase intended word count 2K words
JULY 26 87 degrees 📀 小雨天气 by 苡慧, 嘿人李逵, 十七草
“it’s hot”
your words are just short of a half-hearted groan, slipping through the abrupt ruffle of the sheets as you (poorly attempt) to desperately kick off the comforter from the expanse of your legs. it only takes a second before you're arching your back in the fashion of a cat, stretching out your limbs in search of the only untouched portion of the mattress, toes straining and muscles tight. and when you do find it, relishing in the cold relief of the unexplored fabric, it's a feeling nothing if not short lived, stifled by the heat of your roommate's breath fanning against the side of your neck and the brush of his knuckles against the bare skin of your stomach.
"you’ve said that,”
his reply is spoken in a low, quiet inflection. one barely above a whisper, and yet with the lack of distance, one which deceivingly sounds much louder. kun's words are partnered with the motion of his legs as he attempts to shift to something akin to what you assume to be a more comfortable position--knees knocking against your own and hand retracting from your torso as if he was scalded. cheeks burnt a rosy red, rivaling the heat of summer as he pushes his hair back upon his head with an impassive undertaking.
“i’ll keep saying it,”
he huffs and despite the darkness of the room, you know he's shooting you an incredulous expression. “that won’t make it any less hot,”
“you know what would make it less hot,” you words are acute--directed at him with a acumated accuracy--as you angle your head upwards, slightly grazing his chin as you narrow your eyes at the shadowed frame of his silhouette.
it takes him a moment to find the words, to compose himself enough to muster an actual answer other than an audible gulp. an embarrassingly loud response doubling as a last ditch effort to relieve the sudden dryness in his mouth. “what?”
“if you got out of my bed,”
the noise that leaves kun's mouth can be likened more to a whine than anything else, the hand previously laying upon his forehead falling to rest upon his eyes. “it’s too hot in my room,”
you raise a brow, lips parted and tongue lifted against the sharpened point of canines. your words are drawled, consumed by a sarcasm otherwise suffocated by the casual tone of affection. “so your solution is to sleep in a twin sized bed with your roommate?”
kun's quick to jump to his own defense, parting his fingers and snapping his gaze towards your own. an undertaking which he ultimately, immediately regrets within the first fraction of a second, seeing far too much of those pretty eyes of yours for his voice to remain steady. it takes all his effort (and a calculated cough from the back of his throat) to beholden any shred of faux apathy--lips pursed before reluctantly curving into the beginnings of his softly enunciated consonants. “the couch is uncomfortable,”
a noise that can only ever be interpreted as disbelief is quick to leave your ajar mouth. “more uncomfortable than sleeping on top of me?”
he hesitates, swallowing quickly only to part his lips in the swift beginnings of a further explanation. one that begins only to end with the tensing of his jaw, before repeating the process three times over until your roommate is positively confident that any and all arguments are utterly incomprehensible and inconclusive. he intends to think up some witty remark, something to have you grinning and pushing back on his shoulder (he loves that habit of yours, though ten would argue that kun seems to love everything about you... ) but the only clever rebuttal he summons is:
“… yeah?”
you laugh and for the moment, for the split second in time which his ears ring from the airy, tired expression of your continued amusement at his own expense--he's holding nothing but a puffed up pride from his not-so-witty, very-much-not-so-clever response. (speaking of ears ringing, he might have tinnitus. is it possible to contract it from long term exposure to a roommate who sends him into something just short of cardiac arrest?)
"you don't sound very confident," your tone is a whisper away from mockery, flashing him that crooked and right leaning smile that hes found to be burned into his memory (so burned in fact that even the sher recollection of it makes him feel as if he has been set alight, pun intended). he only hums in return, a reply that spells out defeat in every way but overt words.
and for a few moments, with the lull in your usual back and forth, you're met with nothing but the steady inhale and exhale of your counterpart and the accompanying song of cicadas which thrums through the open windows. it's within this intermission that you find yourself growing ever warmer. though you can't be too sure if it was from the humid heat of july or the ever decreasing distance between you and your roommate--however, you find it safest to assume the former (despite all signs pointing to the latter).
the comfortable silence between the two of you is interrupted only by the shift of your frame, flipping over to face him with a sluggish roll of your shoulders. you're much closer than before, albeit there's more of you on the bed now then off of it, and you tense--body pressed gingerly against his own in a far from subtle affection that has kun about to drop dead on the spot. it's a touch which lingers, as if you're testing the waters, waiting for the inevitable, brash jerk of his stature that never seems to come. "i don't mind it,"
"me? or the heat?"
your answer follows instantly, like you were expecting the question. a reply made with no hesitation, almost as if there was no thought behind it at all. "the heat,"
"and me?" you've known kun long enough to be familiar with the slight tremble in the inflection of his voice, the way his tone darts upwards at the end of his sentences and the nervous swallow between each word. all things present here, all found within two measly syllables--spoken with such an unbridled anticipation that you nearly kiss him tell him then and there (perhaps you're getting overheated, a twin bed is much, much too small).
"honest answer? or a funny one?"
kun pauses, tongue caught between puffy lips as he considers his options. his eyes roll over the details of the ceiling, carefully selecting his vocabulary and drawing out his response for fear of all the wrong words spilling out. words that detail just exactly how much you've occupied his every waking thought, that express in every detail how he's thinking of you right now (a series of sentiments that are in no shape or form anything that just a roommate would feel). "funny, then honest,"
you shrug, shoulders brushing against his own as you offer him a seemingly disinterested countenance--one disrupted only by the slightest, upwards tug at the corner of your lips. "you're tolerable,"
he scoffs, thrusting an accusatory finger in your direction. one that begins with a high velocity only to falter backwards, much to close to nearly poking out your eye. the proximity is unprecedented, intimate, and he finds himself struggling to adjust to it (though he'd like too, get used to it that is--a thought that has the tip of his ears painted a charming shade of crimson). "if i'm tolerable, i can't imagine what ten is to you,"
you laugh and once more, kun finds himself attempting to commit it to memory. there's something different about it here, perhaps the closeness, perhaps the muddied humidity of the weather thats drenched itself over your sickeningly sweet, songbird intonation. or perhaps it's the way he can feel your chest shake with the vibrado of your entertainment or the details of your face (the way your eyelashes stick to your cheek, the crease of your brow, and the soft crescents that tug at the corner of your eyes). "do you really want to know?"
your tone is playful, question poised in between the beginnings of your snickering. a reception originated from the soft snarl on your roommate's lips and the ever-obvious widening of his eyes. an expression all too familiar in the confines of conversation about ten lee. the same ten lee who is a little too sweet on you for kun's liking and whom you seem to favor more than anyone else in your apartment's social circle. the same ten lee who knows this fact drives kun up the wall (and then some) and who uses this to his utter advantage (and amusement).
"no, no, don't tell me," kun corrects (though his dismissal sounds as if it's a hair away from begging) with the click of his tongue and a lazy flick of his wrist, waving off your taunt with no more than a dissatisfied huff, "i don't want to hear it,"
you quirk a brow, tongue pressing against the inside of your cheek (another habit that kun is endeared too, one that makes his head spin and his knees feel weak). "afraid it's something good?"
his answer is immediate, an earnest confession made with no equivocation but only the barest bones of irritation (one garnered from the thought of your affection being directed at the cat-like blonde rather than himself ... completely normal for roommates, right?). "yes,"
in every depiction of how this conversation was going to go, you certainly never expected a straightforward, blunt answer from kun. or at least, not one that made your stomach plummet to your knees and your heart beat five times too fast. you might be suffering from a rapidly onset case of heat exhaustion, maybe sun poisoning? one look at his expression--eyes half lidded and brows furrowed to sit upon the slender bridge of his nose--says otherwise.
perhaps it's his own searing honesty (one that makes you feel much hotter than the weather does) or the soft, ardent tone of his reply but you find yourself posing him another question--one framed around a quieter, more tender lilt. "well do you want your honest answer?"
"as long as it's better than ten's,"
in any other scenario, you would jump at the chance to tease him. to hold his schoolboy-esque jealously over his head in a light-hearted triumph. to bring it up in any and every further conversation, only for the sake of pricking at his pride and to earn nothing but taunting grins and laughter from yourself. but when you try, when the words lay on the tip of your tongue ready to be spat out with a dizzying purr, you find yourself unable to find them. or say them. or anything with the way he's looking at you. an expression that screams impatience and an adoration that goes straight to your head--dizzying you to a degree of nausea (or butterflies fluttering against the walls of your stomach, the more likely yet less inclined explanation).
"i think you're my favorite,"
kun blinks slowly at you, tilting his head on his shoulder to get a better look, to determine if you were teasing (an outcome he dreads more than honesty). there's a smile toying at the edges of his lips, pulling up into a softened, tired grin. black eyelashes fawn against his cheeks, strands of platinum blonde falling before his eyes as he speaks. "your favorite what? roommate? because you only have on--"
"everything,"
you think you can pinpoint the exact moment when his breathe catches in his throat, a short-lived, choked sputter of a response that drags both him and you into an underlying, all consuming silence. one interwoven with the trill of the cicadas and the trembling, spontaneous steps of the curtains, locked in an undying trot with the july breeze.
"it's hot,"
you huff. "i've been saying that,"
he shifts, dropping his hand from his face to rest upon yours. it's a movement made with no indecision, no pause or procrastination. a gentle, delicate endearment emphasized by the threading of his fingers between your own. kun's words are quiet, a clarifying correction that only serves to worsen the flustered state of his countenance. "i feel hot,"
"yeah," you return, squeezing his hand against your own, "me too,"
taglist. @evilsailorsenshi @firstdonutllamafarm @222brainrot @scinclaitnoir @yangasm thank you for all your support and love! ♡
🗯️ if there are ever two things i am absolutely obsessed over and crushed by, it's kun and summer. the latter of which everyone on this account is about to be made painfully aware of with the 10+ timestamp works in progress in my drafts that are all summer centered. i'm so endeared to kun, i am just so fond of him (·•᷄∩•᷅ ) so i hope that (and the sweetness of the mundane) was conveyed well here. this was also supposed to be no more than a couple hundred words ... but it's practically a short form (ง ͠ಥ_ಥ)ง i got a little overtaken by it ...
🧾 © 00127am 2024
#⏱ wake up! it's 00127am!#⩇:⩇⩇ timestamps#📋 - wayv#📋 - kun#nct#nct fanfic#nct imagines#nct scenarios#nct x reader#wayv imagines#wayv scenarios#wayv#nct wayv#wayv fanfic#wayv fluff#wayv x reader#qian kun#kun x reader#kun wayv#kun nct#kun imagines#kun scenarios#kun fluff#kun fanfic#kun x you#wayv drabbles#kun drabbles#wayv headcanons#wayv kun#wayv x you
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괜찮아, 괜찮아 (Fantasy); qk
˗ˏˋ🎧´ˎ˗ pairing; kun x female!reader
˗ˏˋ🎧´ˎ˗ words; 3.3k
˗ˏˋ🎧´ˎ˗ genre; smut, fluff
˗ˏˋ🎧´ˎ˗ warnings; dom!kun, sub!reader, mc got that dawg in her (she's a pathetic, horny, pervert), privacy invasion, use of a condom (I can't believe it!!), cunnilingus, two reader orgasms, constant check-ins, aftercare crumbs, very soft but passionate smut, let me know if I missed anything
↻ ◁ || ▷ : The ultimate soft dom, Qian Kun everyone. Thanks for requesting! Oh! And obviously listen to Fantasy by Fei while reading the smut.
How long…
You can barely finish the sentence in your mind amidst the anguish. Twenty minutes ago you were finally able to filter your friends out of your home. You don’t know if they got together to conspire behind your back or if they naturally decided your place was the hangout spot.
All it took was you telling the group chat that there was a spare key under the welcome mat. You explained that it was in case they were nearby and needed something urgently. Now you come home from work and find three people on your couch, someone in the kitchen, and someone using your computer to play minecraft. Unless you’re looking for an impromptu party, you immediately clean house.
That’s what had to happen today. They were in the middle of a session of Mario Party on your switch, begging you to let them finish first before you kick them out. You would’ve been a little lenient, maybe even sat and watched, but something was going on with you. You weren’t sure if your period was coming soon or what, but you’ve been so utterly horny you’ve gone brain dead.
Fifty minutes ago you spent far too long at work zoned out while staring at your computer screen. You were slack jawed, vivid depictions of filthy hardcore sex playing in your mind. You switched from celebrity to celebrity, then to old flames, then to hot strangers you’ve had fleeting encounters with. All your options were exhausted and your brain was reduced to goo. That’s how you rationalize images of a shirtless Kun making an appearance in your latest fantasy. The forefront of your mind fought against it. This was gonna make things weird in one way or another you thought as the back of your mind broadcasted more and more. Kun groping you through your clothes on a train. Kun taking you upstairs during a party. Kun fingering you under the table at a packed restaurant.
Like never before, your mind was igniting, and so was your core. Forty minutes ago was when your shift ended and you rushed to the bathroom. It was unreasonable to assume you soaked through your pants, but you could feel how saturated it was. The wetness sat uncomfortably against your mound. You wipe off what you can and rush out of there. You had a long list of ideas for porn to watch and you were planning to stretch the session for as long as you could.
Thirty minutes before your humiliation, you step into the door to encounter your obstacle. Five pairs of eyes look up at you, some guilty, some unabashed.
“Please let us finish. It’s the least you can do.” Hendery’s begging is rendered unconvincing by his entitled undertone. You cock an eyebrow up at him. He holds a frightened expression before caving. “No, you’re right.”
“But it’s your turn to roll!” Yeri whines, grabbing Hendery to stop him from gathering his things.
“Get up.” You state emotionlessly. The longer you’re deprived from touching yourself, the more irritable you become. Cycling through glaring at each of them ends up with you meeting Kun’s gaze. Your annoyed expression drops, your mouth dropping open a bit as well. He smiles nervously at you.
“Looks like you had a long day at work today?” His question makes you realize he’s not nervous about being scolded, but because he’s concerned about you. It’s a touching realization that shouldn’t be shooting lightning straight to your core. See? Things are weird now.
“Yeah. Really long.” Your mouth suddenly goes dry as all the agonizing fantasies involving him come to mind.
“Alright, guys.” Kun uses his player one privileges to close the game out, taking the time to turn the switch off despite the groans and protests around him. “Let's give her her house back.” Kun reaches over to tug an urgently protesting Yeri up from the couch. You alternate between monitoring the slackers making excuses to stay and monitoring Kun. His unwavering authority over everyone has you pressing your vagina between your thighs as discreetly as possible.
Back to twenty minutes ago when you wave goodbye to Kun, him seemingly moving in slow motion as the closing door gradually reduced your vision of him to nothing. You didn’t have time to mourn this when an overwhelming wave of arousal hits you once you realize you’re finally alone. You rush to your room, squealing as you hop onto your bed. You’re trying to get things started as fast as you can but trying to shove your headphones in your ear while pushing your pants off might’ve been delaying things. You eventually get situated, excitement thrumming through you as you find the perfect porn video.
“Oh shit.” Kun slams one of his hands onto the steering wheel.
“What?” Sooyoung asks from the backseat. “Forget something?”
Kun’s ensuing sigh answers the question for her. “My wallet. I dropped it in her room while I was getting her switch. I forgot to go back and grab it.”
“Does that mean we’re going back?” Yeri asks excitedly.
“No, leave that woman alone! I’ll drop you guys off and then go back.”
“Fine.” Yeri replies petulantly. “Then just drop me off at YangYang’s.”
“Me too.” Hendery says, followed by an echo from Sooyoung.
“Party at my place, yeah! Come straight to my place after you get it. Tell Ms. Bossy she can come too once she’s done being a stick-in-the-mud.”
Kun groans, not knowing where to start. Instead he just opts for agreeing. One could argue Kun dropping them off individually would’ve bought you more time. That doesn’t change the fact you were planning to go until your hands were tired and all your toys were dead. You would’ve been better off if Kun had forgotten about his wallet until tomorrow. It didn’t matter now that twenty minutes had passed.
You don’t hear the front door opening, you don’t hear Kun yell out to you, you don’t hear him open your bedroom door. Of course you don’t, because you have loud moaning, skin slapping, and sloshing noises blasting in your ears.
Kun wants to look away but remains focused in your direction. Should he try to grab his wallet secretly and leave? Or should he try to get your attention? And then what? Try to convince you it isn’t a big deal that he saw you rubbing your clit and watched your juices roll down until they soiled your comforter? Kun clenches his eyes shut before blinking them a few times. What was he doing?
No, he should walk back out– carefully– and text you from outside the house so you could get situated. Problem solved. Still, his feet remain rooted in the same spot.
“Kun, please~”
A strong sensation plows into him like a truck. You say his name so salaciously he can feel his cock humming. He looks down, cursing himself for wearing pajama bottoms as a joke. You can see his hardening member clear as day. A gasp from you tears his attention away. You both gape at each other in horror. To answer the question currently haunting you– how long has he been standing there– not that long, but long enough.
“I-I’m so sorry.” Kun speaks first, face-palming with a hearty groan. He peaks up at you, guilt very obvious in his face. He notices the way your eyes track downward. He worries lip.
“I know, I’m making things even weirder… Although I think you’re partly to blame for that too.” He explains as if he’s breaking the news to you. Your heart drops out of your ass as you scramble to sit up on your bed.
“What do you mean?” The words tumble out of your mouth. Only then do you realize your bottom half is very much still bare. You swipe one of your pillows and lay it over your lap.
“I um… I heard you say my name–”
You cry out in anguish as you cover your face. Kun moves closer, trying to console you but your dramatic wailing is too loud.
“It’s okay! It’s okay!”
“How?! How is it okay?!” You unintentionally scream at the man. Kun’s head rolls over his shoulders, his gaze hazarding toward his cock that’s showing no interest in softening.
“Maybe because we’re in the same boat?” He sounds unsure, or maybe it’s just how awkward this situation is. You sigh heavily, though it does nothing to drain the worry from your body.
“What do we do from here? It’s up to you.” Kun asks. You presume he’s asking you if you want to proceed like adults and acknowledge what happened, or bury it and take it to your graves. That’s not where your brain goes, though. You look at the way he regards you, that look in his eye he has for everyone. Authoritative care is what you’ll call it for now. Before you appreciated it because he was a dependable, great friend. Now you can’t stop thinking about anything but him coaxing you sweetly toward an orgasm.
“Help?” You blurt out, in hopes you don’t have to spell it out for him. Either way, the two of you are walking away from this with your friendship irreparably changed. Why not get something out of it? Kun looks at you in confusion and you sigh frustratedly. Only as you start to explain does his confusion dissipate.
“Help me… I’ll help you–”
Kun climbs onto your bed, kneeling in front of you. “I can help you.” He agrees, his voice soothing you. You can’t help humming at the way he phrases it. He grabs the pillow and tosses it to the side. You don’t get to be self-conscious about being exposed again, not when he’s already reaching down and scooping up your essence. He breathes a laugh.
“Something tells me you’re already ready to take me.”
Your face heats up but your eyes darken. You nod dumbly, agreeing with the obvious. He comments under his breath about how cute you are. You’re already missing his fingers down there.
“I still want to be sure.” His eyes implore you to give permission.
“Please?” The plea is wispy and pathetic. His eyes darken to match yours, it’s the first time you’ve seen him so openly hungry for something. He moves his soiled fingers toward his lips, hesitating for a second before plunging them into his mouth. His eyes flutter shut as he savors the taste. Your breathing becomes labored as you watch him doing something so filthy, something you thought you’d never see it outside of your fantasies.
“I want to taste more of you.” His voice deepens, sending a chill up your spine. With his hands on either side of your midriff, he eases you lower. You lie flat as he sinks to rest between your legs. His tongue eagerly laps at your mound. You crane your head back until it hits the mattress as his tongue presses firmly against you. Curving against your mound as he drags iti upward. It’s slow, so slow. You fist the sheets– it’s perfect, but you need more.
You plunge your fingers into the soft threads of his hair, clenching them and pushing him closer. He hums disapprovingly against you, pulling away to unlatch your hands from his hair. You pout, itching to disobey.
“Be patient.” He says lightly. Butterflies flutter inside your stomach as you drop your hands to your sides. You keep your eyes on him, aching for his approval.
“Good girl.”
Every inch of your skin ignites, every tiny hair standing on end. Your body feels like it’ll spark if he touches it, and he buries his face into your pussy. You cry out, throwing your head back. The heightened sensitivity doesn’t stop the entire time he laves over your clit. He uses his fingers to spread your folds, making sure your clit is fully exposed. You want to thrash and squirm against him, but you wouldn’t be a good girl if you did that. You would be getting in the way of him giving you what you asked for. So you fist your covers, whimpers and whines floating into the air.
He hums against you again, this time it sounds peaceful. Pleased with pleasing him, your body melts into the bed. This earns you another delightful hum. The static shocks of pleasure subside in favor of a distant one. One rumbling too far away but approaching quickly. As it closes in on you you feel the urge again. You want to press him in closer, clamp your thighs around him. But his eyes are looking intently at you, soft with their persuasion, keeping you good.
So instead your moans become fuller. Wanton oh’s and curses trickle from your lips. You screw your face up, everything becoming tighter the closer it comes. That coil is compressing tightly and you just know it’s about to snap.
“I’m gonna cum.” You say almost in distress as fretful moans fight free from you. “I’m gonna cum!”
You buck against Kun’s face, fists tightening around your covers and cracking some of your joints. The orgasm comes in waves, whipping you with electricity that borders on unbearable. Your vision whites out and in the middle of your clouded thinking you wonder if you’re still fantasizing. Kun rubs soothing, slow circles into your clit as he climbs up your body.
“It’s okay, it’s okay.” He whispers right next to your ear, his hot breath raising goosebumps where it lands. He peppers kisses up from your shoulder to right under your ear as he slows his finger to a stop. “Are you ready?” He breathes out as he maneuvers to face you. Your eyes rake down his figure, his lips, the column of his throat, his shoulder, his chest. You linger on his arms, reaching up to fondle his muscles. He chuckles, his head dropping down and resting his forehead against yours.
He rolls off of you to shimmy off his pajama pants. You watch as the pair you used to associate with unstimulating situations are discarded and sullied in your mind forever. His shirt is slowly peeled away to reveal the toned stomach you’ve only seen peeks of. You couldn’t help your mouth watering then and nothing has changed now, especially with the dark hair leading to what you need the most. The boxers hugging his hips sit as low as they can without revealing himself. Not that it matters with how prominently his manhood is bulging from them.
He gives those a shimmy as well, pulling them over the hump of his dick. The band finally gives way, springing his cock free. He exhales shakily, his arm flexing as he closes his hand around the shaft and drags his fist all the way down. The member flings up again, slapping against his stomach. Your breath catches as the urge to whine overwhelms you.
He discards his underwear and swings his leg back over you, regarding you with an attentive gaze. You nod again before he can even ask if you’re okay.
“Good.” He chuckles, kissing your forehead. Hearing the first word of the phrase you crave and how long this is taken is giving you blue balls. You take a quick breath before flitting your eyes up at him.
“I want you.” You whisper.
“I know.” He replies with those passionate eyes and that warm smile. He scoops his hips lower, his tip brushing against your mound. “I want you too.”
He leans over to the nightstand right by your head, giving you an up close view to his pecs. You’re so distracted by the view that you don’t question what he’s doing. He comes back up with a condom in hand. Your brows squeeze together and you nearly ask him how he knew they were there, but that’s not a priority. Your priority is what he’s slipping the condom over right now. You swallow hard as the latex rolls every ridge and vein. You hum lewdly as you press your glossed lips against each other. Kun hisses as he lines himself up.
“I’ve been wanting to fuck you for so long–”
He drops that bomb just before easing himself in. Your shock gets caught in your throat, becoming a gargled moan. It means so much more now that he’s inside of you that he wasn’t just hard from the lewd scene. He saw you and heard you say his name and it drove him wild.
A part of it felt wrong. The way you rolled your hips up to coax him deeper, looking up at him. Qian Kun, the appointed leader of your friend group. If anyone else from the group chat knew about this they would freak out. The foundation of the entire group would be shaken. How wrong it felt just made his cock being deep inside you feel that much better.
He draws his hips back in a languid motion before easing them forward again. He inches inside you, the stretch stinging a little less.
“You okay?” He asks breathlessly. You nod for the umpteenth time that evening. You go to close your eyes when you feel him lean over you. You snap your eyes back open again, pleased by seeing him this close again. You look deeply into his dark chocolate eyes. “Can you use your words?” He asks, a hint of a scold in his tone. You nearly nod again, stammering when you catch yourself.
“Y-yes, I’m okay.”
“Good.” He’s plunging deep inside you but he’s edging you at the same time. You want him to say it again. Why won’t he say it? You whimper, snapping your hips up to his. He tsks, reaching down to hold your hips steady.
“Not very patient are you, baby?” His scolding is more blatant now. You pout and he pecks it. Once he lifts himself back up, his necklace is draped perfectly over your face. His thrusts gain a consistent rhythm, one that has his necklace bouncing over you. This excites you more than you expect it to, your hips twitching a few times through the jolts of pleasure.
Maybe you’re still high off the heightened arousal you’ve built up in the last hour or so but the friction he’s providing has you practically drooling. He draws his hips back so far that he pulls out. He pushes back in and keeps that motion until a turbulent moan comes rolling from the depths of your soul.
“Oh fuck, Kun!” Your legs start to tremble violently. Moans keep pouring from you before you get the chance to think. He keeps you wide and gaping, each time he draws back your hole clenches for him. His shameless moans from above you has your stomach twisted in knots. You clench your teeth, the sudden overwhelming pressure becoming too much.
“It feels so fucking good.” Your voice is reduced to a wispy shell of what it used to be. You lean forward to bury your head in his chest as the trembling in your legs quickens. “So fucking good.” The words woosh from you aggressively. His hips suddenly slam down and you sob against his chest. Your legs trap him in a shaky cage as your orgasm looms.
“Good girl.” He coos, his hand reaching down to cup your cheek. “Taking me so good.”
With that, your eyes roll back as your hips spasm. A guttural cry rips free from you as you grip like a vice around his cock. The tight grasp you have on him makes him whisper a shaky “Oh fuck…”. It’s impossible for him not to immediately fill the condom with you milking him like this. A sudden jerk has his hips drawing back and plunging very deep suddenly. Your back arches off the bed as the last of your orgasm ripples through you.
Along with a breath you didn’t know you were holding comes a groan that shreds your vocal chords. You’re reduced to whimpers after that, collapsing to the bed. Kun follows soon after, monitoring his weight so he’s not crushing you. He shushes you, cradling your head as he kisses your cheek. An airy laugh sounds from him.
“Very good girl.”
request
nct 127/u masterlist
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heart attack
&&. there's something hilarious about the beautiful doctor there to help with your terrible habits.
pairing: qian kun x gn!reader
genre: fluff
warnings: mentions of overworking, mentions of passing out & hospitalization
word count: 0.9k
notes: this….. THISSS💔💔💔 this drabble was very inspired by the thai movie heart attack (a movie that has no right being as cute as it is) kun fits the part so well because first.. doctor kun, and second.. kun is so amazing, i love kun, we all fucking love kun 😿 this is a early bday gift for user junjiie bc we all know he loves kun (happy early bday pookie ily) this is insanely self indulgent because i have slept less than three hours in these past five days and have been working myself to shit because.. med school!! yayyyyyyy!! im so excited!! (is not excited)
"so what's the matter with you?"
the usual roughness that would lace the voice of a medical professional is replaced by the softness you would feel of pillows, you glance up, meeting the eyes of the beautiful man before you. you stare, forgetting where you are for a moment, the exhaustion rendering you speechless.
but it's a whisper in your head that reminds you of where you are, and you flinch. "oh— i um.. there's these rashes appearing on my body".
"okay" he mutters, clicking his tongue and pen in unison. "and where exactly?"
"my arms, my neck.." he hums, pulling up your sleeve to check out what you told him. "also there are some on my fingers".
he bites into his inner cheek, much too close for the sake of your heart. he then glances up, examining your face through his glasses. "you haven't been getting any sleep" he snaps his fingers in your direction, letting go of you and turning back to his computer.
you respond with a dry chuckle, too tired to even try to add emotion. "and you know that how?"
"i can see it in your eyes, those dark circles aren't doing you justice" he sucks his teeth as he types out something. "what's your occupation?"
it isn't strange that he's curious, just answer the question.
you shake your head, mind all over the place. "i work in graphic design".
"ohhh" he doesn't exactly seem surprised. "freelance?"
you nod.
his eyebrows join together. "how does an editing job have you so tired?"
you let out a breath, too exhausted to allow a laugh. "it's a twenty four hour thing, if i'm awake at all times i function better".
"you're barely functioning now".
"well you're a doctor, you always tell people the obvious" you sigh, closing your eyes to try and recollect the many hours of sleep you lost. "i'm sure you aren't any better than me.."
"i'd be inclined to disagree".
you open one eye, staring at the pretty doctor who types away on his computer, catching you in his peripheral vision. (eyes you don't notice due to your lethargy making you less disposed to).
"when was the last time you slept?"
your throat goes dry, your senses reduced to the clear fatigue. you could simply lie, how would he even know? there's no way dr. qian is a psychic, that would be freaky, you're sure it would be nightmarish if that were the case.
there's an indecipherable glimmer in his eye, one that would scare you in regular circumstances where you were fully awake. it's as if he knows you're going to lie, your attempt at fib crawls down your throat before it can even escape your lips. "five days ago".
his reaction is serene, much too calm for your situation. "five days ago.. and how many hours did you sleep?"
your brain is foggy, you almost blurt the number 'six', but that's simply your default response when people ask. why would you ever lie to a doctor?..and the cute doctor especially?
you pause at the wave of your thoughts. what do you mean he's cute?
it's simply common sense, y/n. don't you like smart guys?
you would probably attribute it to your terrible sleep deprivation if it weren't true. you can't deny that the man before you is simply so attractive it should be illegal, he's absolutely gorgeous, how can a regular doctor be so beautiful? you might fall over, not from your lack of sleep, but from the eyes of the man who stares with such care.
"like.. three?"
your voice scratches as you recall the last time you 'slept', he hums, clicking his pen as he notes the information down. he turns in his rolling chair, scooting closer to you. "you mind if i see your hands?"
you can't even put up a fight, you're just about to give into your own exhaustion. you put your hands out for him, and dr. qian takes your hands in his own, examining the rashes which litter your fingers. he's close, so close, you can admire each of his facial features with amazing certainty. everything about him is beautiful, his cheeks, his eyes, the curves of his lips, it's all beautiful, it should be a crime for such a man to exist.
"that's an issue.. have you taken medication for sleep before?" you shake your head, and his fingers slip from yours.
"alright.. i'm going to put you on doxylamine" he mumbles, getting back to noting down your state. you begin scratching at the rashes on your fingers, and he snaps: "don't scratch it".
you move your hands apart rather quickly, his tone of voice intimidating you enough that you pause. he's much too convincing.
he points at you. "tonight, and this next month onward, you sleep before nine o'clock every single day".
you uncharacteristically snicker. "do you sleep before nine o'clock every single day?"
he raises an eyebrow, amused by the question. "i'm the doctor, i know best".
"of course".
"you'll end up dead if you keep going at this rate, take your medication, sleep before nine every day, then check back in with me next month".
"if i'm not available, can i reschedule?"
the question is simply meant to be comedic, you're just about to pass out, trying to sneak in a last minute joke before having to leave the office of the cute doctor. he leans his arm against the desk, smiling at you. "don't reschedule, i want to see you".
and you clearly weren't expecting those words, because your cheeks flare up.
see y/n? you do like smart guys.
#qian kun#kun#wayv#nct#nct imagines#nct drabbles#nct scenarios#wayv imagines#wayv scenarios#wayv drabbles#nct x reader#wayv x reader#kun imagines#qian kun x reader#kun x reader#𑁍 ࣪˖ 𓂃 isa's works!
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how wayv's first kiss with you would be like
pairing: wayv x reader
kun
after a romantic dinner. he drives you home from taking you to your date with him at a fancy dinner he had arranged, wanting you to show how he really loves you and would want to take the relationship into the next step. he walks you to the front porch of your house, standing near the doorstep. before he says goodbye, he says how much he enjoyed the date, and you say the same. there is a still sound of silence of him staring at you. then, he leans in to capture your lips to his. the rhythm of your mouths moving against each other is slow, but good enough for the both of you to feel the butterflies in your stomachs. he smiles at you when you pull away, and then his hand reached for your own, kissing the back of your palm before he leaves the neighborhood. kun will never forget such a memorable moment.
ten
during a game of spin the bottle. at first he laughs, staring at the empty wine bottle landing in your direction. with the rest of the players anticipating, he isn't afraid to back out. he hates being called a coward. he makes no hesitation before smashing his lips against yours. there's still the taste of alcohol both of you consumed just moments ago. besides the liquor, he also feels drunk with the way he keeps pressing his lips deeper and his tongue swiping on your bottom lip as a permission for more access. ten merely forgets the audience watching him, focusing entirely to make you feel good and pleased. when he pulls away, he gets a good view of your lips, smeared and coated with his own saliva, and lipstick smudged from the corners of your mouth. seeing you in that state gives him a satisfied look on his face, a smug creeping up from his lips.
winwin
saying goodbye to him. sicheng is given the opportunity to finally pursue the passion he loves, but it hurts him to know that he needs to leave where he already finds and calls home—you. both of you stand before the pane glass doorframes of the airport, sicheng's hand holds onto the handle of his luggage, while the other never leaves yours. it's all going too fast. the grip on your hand tightens. you notice the way he's trying to hold to his emotions, how hard he's trying to stifle his sobs. he feels you return the same tightness on his hand, assuring him that everything will be fine. a hand slowly creeps up to gently touch his already stained cheeks. he's going to miss you, so much. sicheng's hand clasps around the hand where you touch him, pulling it down. and there, you feel his plump lips on yours. it's trembling, and of course, it's sad. you don't tell him to stay through your reciprocation, but instead, it tells him to go, to chase what he loves.
xiaojun
acting out a kiss scene. it's the first rehearsal of the play the casts are going to act in, including the two of you. it's no surprise when both of you find out to be the leads of the play. dejun thinks that it will go as smoothly as possible, given the fact that the two of you are comfortable with each other of everything, and you think so too. as all of you are reading the script, the director reminds you of the kiss scenes, so when the actual practice came, dejun tells himself that the kiss is and only for professional purposes. he composes himself before standing in front of you with a smile. you say your lines, enunciating them word for word with feelings to embody the character as he does the same. his hands reaches for your own just like what it says on the script, and wasting no time, he plants a kiss on your lips. you don't move, but he feels his stomach doing the somersaults. all he can think about at this very moment is your soft lips, your grip on his hand tightens, your eyelashes tickling his cheeks—then it's all gone when you pull away. looking at each other for a few seconds, a sudden fit of laughter bursts out from the two of you. both of you suppress your giggles when the director yells, telling you and dejun to stop laughing and concentrate on the script.
hendery
out of curiosity. he stares at you with a surprised expression on his face after hearing you ask how a kiss feels like. it's not like he doesn't know how to kiss someone as he had gained experiences from previous relationships, and clearly this was your first. his mind go dizzy when you ask him to kiss you. he isn't sure if it's only his mind playing him, but with a couple slaps across his face, it's not a dream. before kissing you, hendery makes sure to ask if you're still okay with the idea, never forgetting to seek for your consent. with a hand on your neck and the other to cup your cheek, your lips are on his. the lingering touch of your hands on his chest traveling around his neck causes him to smile in between the kiss. he also makes sure that you're satisfied with the kiss he shares with you, in a way that will make you feel good and relieve to know that you just had the best first kiss ever given by your own friend. hendery can't seem to sleep the following nights, replaying the scene over and over again, as he starts to fall in love with you.
yangyang
in the heat of the moment. he understands why you're mad at him for completely ruining your date with a person you recently talked to. yangyang warns you over again that the guy isn't good for you, that his background isn't something that's worth to be with. he watches you pace around the room, telling him that he has no right to deny a relationship you want to have, telling him that he should mind his own business. he couldn't do that. he knows what's best for you because he cares for your happiness. if it weren't for him, you will be trapped in a toxic unbearable relationship that might emotionally and mentally break you. what he wants for you to realize that there is one who could actually treat and love you better—him. yangyang grabs you by the shoulders, snapping you out. you break free from his tight grip, wanting to turn around and leave the room. that is until you feel his hand tug your arm back to face him as he finally smashes his lips against yours. the kiss is nowhere near sweet and full of passion. it's rough, lips smacking against each other, teeth scraping the skin and muscle of your tongues, and short hot breaths filling the quiet room. he's angry, you're angry, but neither of you pull away.
©MEIIDERYZ 2024. ALL RIGHTS RESERVED.
#wayv#wayv imagines#wayv fanfic#wayv fluff#wayv angst#wayv x reader#wayv scenarios#wayv drabbles#wayv au#wayv headcanons#kun#qian kun#chittaphon leechaiyapornkul#ten#ten lee#winwin#dong sicheng#xiao dejun#xiaojun#wong kunhang hendery#wong kunhang#wong hendery#hendery#liu yangyang#yangyang#nct#nct imagines#nct fanfic#nct fluff#nct angst
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⏯ word count: 18.3k ⏯ genre: band au, retired floprockstar/venue manager!kun, rookie/keyboardist!reader, age gap (kun is older), fluff, v v suggestive (lol it’s a kun fic written by me this gets so unhinged im sorry), ft. jungwoo/mark/chenle/jisung as reader’s bandmates, wayv as kun’s coworkers & some special guest appearances maybe?? ⏯ warnings: uhm there’s some maybe weird power dynamics going on here? reader is a former fan of kun’s but like his band flopped and they never met back then so 🤷♀️ read at your own peril ig, not necessarily a warning but since i do avoid describing the reader’s appearance in my fics, i wanted to give a heads up—reader is in a punk/alternative band and is mentioned and/or implied to have some tattoos and piercings (other than earlobes). i don’t get super detailed, but since it’s there, i wanted to make sure y’all weren’t caught off-guard ⏯ extra info: set in the same universe as filler episodes & sugarcoated brain, but u don’t need to read those in order to understand this one at all i prommy ⏯ author’s note: those teasers of emo kun for frequency coming out right after i wrote a punk venue manager kun into sugarcoated brain??? oh i was not going to get out unscathed ⏯ now playing… frost – txt | doing this again! – bears in trees | entropy – beach bunny
── ⋆⋅♫⋅⋆ find more stories from backstage at venue:hell here!
“He played the keys in Vizions!” You hissed, anxiously looking over at the hallway as if Kun might reappear.
“You should see if he’ll sign your album,” Jungwoo suggested with a grin, nudging you with his elbow.
“Or fuck him,” Chenle deadpanned. “You’re in a band now too, not just a fan.”
“Venue:Hell…” Chenle hummed as he parked the band’s van in the alleyway in the back of the building. “When was the last time we were here?”
“We had a set at their Valentine’s Day event, remember?” You leaned over the console from the backseat. “When the lead singer of Roses for Eyes got decked in face?”
A chorus of ‘oh yeah!’s and other noises of recognition sprang up around you, as well as a few snickers and hisses of sympathy at the memory. You all had already performed that night and were in line for the bar nearby when the incident happened, practically front row for it.
“And we agreed to come back,” Jisung snorted.
“If we can make it out with no broken noses, I think that’ll be a success,” you grinned, reaching over Mark to open the side door.
After grabbing some of your equipment from the back, the five of you approached the back door. It was unlocked, as promised, and you all descended into the cool, dim basement venue.
“Hello? We’re Doing this Again! The new band!” Jungwoo called out from the front of the group. You shut the door firmly behind you.
A young man skidded around into your line of sight, bright smile on his face. “Hey! I’m Yangyang.”
“Our assistant manager is out for the next few weeks, so we’re kind of all sharing custody of you guys,” he explained, gesturing for you to follow him. “I’ll show you the green room, we’ll get the rest of your stuff, then our manager should be out here before your soundcheck.”
Yangyang and another employee, Kunhang, helped unload your equipment from your van, and began setting it up on stage. You learned that Yangyang was their sound guy, and Kunhang did lights and the rest of their tech.
Once your equipment was all set up, Yangyang and Kunhang exchanged uncertain looks, glancing over towards a hallway attached to the main room that you were in. Yangyang shrugged one shoulder and made a gesture for Kunhang to go ahead. The tech rolled his eyes at his coworker, but stepped forward anyway, flashing you all a bright smile.
“We’ll show you around since he’s not out yet. He said he wanted to talk to you before soundcheck,” he explained apologetically.
Kunhang and Yangyang showed you most of the building, ending in the main green room backstage.
“Uh, you can settle in,” Yangyang waved his hands around vaguely. “We’re going to go see if the old man finally keeled over or something.”
“I heard that.” A stern voice resounded from just outside the green room, making the two employees jump and turn around.
A third man had joined you all, focusing an unamused gaze on Yangyang and Kunhang. He was dressed in black from head to toe, a black leather jacket over black button-up shirt and black jewelry glinting from his neck, ears, and knuckles. He wore dark pants and big black work boots too, so you were doubly surprised at how quietly he could move. While you could tell he was older than the rest of you, you definitely wouldn’t call him old. As soon as his sharp eyes flicked over to you from under a curtain of jet-black hair, a jolt of recognition zapped through you, and you grabbed Jisung’s arm at the same time that you bit down on your tongue to avoid making a sound. Your friend’s arm tensed in surprise, but he thankfully stayed quiet too. The newcomer’s gaze went back to his employees as quick as it had flitted over your band.
“Go find something to do,” he shooed them away with one swift hand movement.
“On it!” They replied in unison, shoes squeaking on the concrete floor as they quite literally ran away.
He turned back to you all, taking a few steps in to fully enter the green room. The annoyance drained from his face, and his features became beautifully neutral as he greeted you all politely. “Sorry, I was on a call, it took much longer than I thought it would. If they didn’t already tell you, my assistant manager is out, so it’s a bit hectic around here right now. Normally our weekly act is her responsibility.”
“Is she okay?” Jungwoo asked.
“Yes, she’s fine,” the manager replied. “She’s assisting our usual weekly with their mini-tour. Which is why you all are here, of course. We appreciate you agreeing to fill in for RFE on this temporary basis.”
“Thanks for the opportunity,” Mark replied automatically.
“If you all do well, it might not have to be temporary, hm?” He said, and though his words were kind, his expression didn’t change. You were beginning to taste blood. “I’m Kun, manager of Venue:Hell. Please let me know if you have any issues while you’re here. I’ve delayed your soundcheck already, so I’ll let you go ahead.”
With that, Kun stepped out as briskly as he had arrived, leaving no room for further conversation or introductions.
As soon as he left, Jisung yanked his arm from your grip and looked at you incredulously. “Christ, Y/N, what the fuck—”
“He played the keys in Vizions!” You hissed, anxiously looking over at the hallway as if he might reappear.
“Wait, like that band that only released one album like a decade ago that you’re obsessed with?” Chenle questioned doubtfully. “How can you be sure?”
“She went to like every gig they had,” Mark recounted. “Got us grounded, and then would insist on sneaking out while we were grounded to go to even more. If anybody is gonna recognize a member of that band, it’s her.”
“You should see if he’ll sign your album,” Jungwoo suggested with a grin, nudging you with his elbow.
“Or fuck him,” Chenle deadpanned abruptly, dropping onto the well-used couch, stretching his legs out. “You’re in a band now too, not just a fan.”
“You guys don’t get it, I didn’t just think he was hot—”
“That was definitely part of it,” Mark snorted.
“—He was awesome on the keys! And he wrote all of their songs, and produced their entire album by himself!” You defended yourself. “He made me realize I didn’t just have to do piano recitals and that I could do something like this.”
“Alright, sorry, Y/N,” Chenle said softly. “We were just messin’ with you.”
“Do you think he recognized you? Since you apparently went to so many of their shows?” Jisung asked.
You shook your head. “No way. I never had the courage to talk to them. And that was like ten years ago anyway.”
“I still think you should see if he’ll sign your CD.” Jungwoo patted your shoulder. “It’d probably make his day.”
“I don’t know, clearly the band thing didn’t work out for him,” Chenle added. “He might want to just forget it all.”
You bit the inside of your cheek nervously, then let out a dejected sigh. “Nah, it’s not like I carry the CD with me everywhere…”
Your set at Venue:Hell that night was a hit, if you did say so yourself. It wasn’t nearly as big of a turnout as the Valentine’s event you’d played at, but that was to be expected for a random Thursday night. The crowd was surprisingly engaged, especially since you were careful to incorporate a couple covers of popular songs into your set.
Running off the stage, the five of you immediately tackled each other in a group hug that was all yelling, elbows, sweat, laughing, and chaos.
“One down, three to go!” You cheered, ruffling up Jisung’s matted hair.
“Oh my god, we’re doing this again!” Mark added breathlessly.
“Boo!” You all immediately jeered at the corny joke he made every chance he got. “Tomato! Tomato!”
He laughed loudly as you and Chenle pushed and jostled him, but not enough for him to fully leave your circle. Jungwoo tugged him back in.
“Good job, guys,” Dejun, a stage tech, congratulated you as he passed by, starting to break down some of the equipment on stage.
Your band broke apart to help the staff shut down the stage for the night as other music played over the speakers of the venue and patrons chatted and danced on the floor. A few came up to the stage to talk with you as you worked, interested both in you all as the new weekly, and what had happened to the old weekly. They seemed relieved to hear that Roses for Eyes wasn’t gone for good, and were really enthused in the feedback they had for you.
After putting your equipment that you would be taking home in the green room, you all decided to stay and mingle for a little while more. If this was only going to be for four nights, you wanted to make them count and do as much as you could to get your band’s name out there. You ordered a drink from Sicheng the bartender, at which time you found out that the 50% employee discount applied to you too for the time being. Turning back to the crowd, you strained to spot any of your bandmates among the bodies.
“Hey,” Kun had appeared next to you at the bar, and you jumped out of your skin.
“Fuckin’ Christ, dude,” you coughed, trying to catch your breath. “Can you teleport or something?”
“Sorry.” He seemed more amused than apologetic. “Good set.”
“Thanks.” You took a sip of your drink to avoid looking him in the eye.
“Who did the arrangement for that first cover?”
“I did. Uhm, it obviously wasn’t for a rock band, so I had to do some tweaking…”
He nodded, looking actually impressed. “You compose?”
“Me and Mark for the most part, yeah. The other guys pitch in on songwriting sometimes, too. Chenle’s adlibs are crazy good.”
“Cool. See you next week.” Kun pushed off the bar, disappearing into the crowd.
Mark and Jungwoo found you still rooted to that spot, robotically sucking down your drink.
“Woah, I know we did good, but I don’t know if it was ‘get absolutely smashed’ good,” Mark laughed, pulling your drink down from your mouth.
“Come on, we got Jisung dancing!” Jungwoo took your drink and put it on the bar.
Your eyebrows shot up at the news that your wallflower drummer had apparently joined in the fun. “Really?”
“Yeah, let’s go!” He grabbed your arm and toted you off with the two of them.
The next week when you all arrived in the green room, you were a little surprised to see a plate of cookies sitting on the table in the center of the room. You all exchanged uncertain glances, looking around for any clue as to who the cookies were from or for. Jungwoo was the first one to take one from the plate and bite into it.
“Pretty good,” he gave his approval through a mouthful, encouraging the other guys to each take one or two.
You were still wary as you approached, picking a cookie up and taking a small bite. It was soft and chewy, and soon you were taking another bite.
“Oh good, you guys found the cookies,” Kun was in the doorway, having once again snuck up on you all.
Jisung started choking on his cookie, and Chenle had to smack him on the back to get it back down the right pipe. Kun’s lip twitched as he was clearly trying not to laugh, a dimple appearing and disappearing on one cheek instead.
“Did you buy these?” Mark asked, muffled through the cookie in his mouth.
“Baked them, yeah.”
“You made them?!” You stared at him, half-eaten cookie in hand.
“Unless they’re bad, then Ten made them.” He winked at you before slipping out of the room without another word.
“God, Y/N, stop drooling,” Chenle snickered, wiping at your chin teasingly.
You smacked his hand away, glaring at him. “Shut up.”
“You seriously looked like you were about to pounce on him,” Jungwoo added helpfully, tweaking your cheek as he walked by.
“Ugh, you guys are the worst!”
Week three found you alone on the stage before your soundcheck. Your bandmates were out on a food run, but you didn’t feel like getting back in the van, so you were messing around on your keyboard. The venue staff was also scarce, you had only briefly seen Yangyang since showing up today. Tapping your foot to a familiar beat, you closed your eyes as you hummed a melody that you knew by heart, fingers flitting across the keys. It wasn’t your own band’s song, but one by Vizions, a powerful ballad.
“Haven’t heard that in a long time.”
Errant notes rang out as your eyes flew open, heart jumping out of your chest. “Fuck!”
You spotted Kun down on the floor, covering his mouth as he started laughing. “Sorry, didn’t mean to scare you.”
“You always mean to scare the shit out of people.” You rolled your eyes at him, crossing your arms over your chest. “It’s like your favorite hobby.”
“Alright, guilty.” He held his hands up, still grinning. “Seriously, how the hell do you even know that?”
“I used to go to your shows like, all the time,” you admitted, staring down at the keys. “You were like, kinda a big reason I started doing this at all.”
“Wait seriously?” All the humor had fallen from his face as he stared at you with confusion and a touch of wonder, brows furrowed and mouth parted.
“Yeah, I uh—” You grabbed your bag from the ground at your feet and fetched the CD that had been sitting in there for the past two weeks, since your first night at Venue:Hell. “I still have your CD.”
Kun jumped up onto the stage with you, taking the plastic case from you and turning it over slowly in his hands. “I don’t even have one of these anymore. God, I remember desperately trying to sell these at shows after we had them made…” He peered a little closer at your face, then shook his head. “No, I don’t remember you, sorry.”
“It’s okay, I never talked to you guys at any of the shows,” you assured him. “I mean, what if you were creeps?”
He let out a few hearty chuckles at that, nodding. “Okay, fair. Good self-preservation skills.”
“Also, I think someone else was at the table when I bought it.”
“It’s been a while since I’ve heard any of those songs.” He handed you the disc back.
“I didn’t realize you were going to hear me,” you muttered. “When I was playing that, I was just—”
“I’m not mad,” he reassured you. “I’m just… shocked. That’s all.”
“Great, because I kind of want to die in a hole right now, so—”
“When did you realize? Who I was?”
You rubbed the back of your neck. “As soon as I saw you…”
“That makes sense,” he nodded. “I thought I had scared you too, when you grabbed Jisung.”
“You did, just not the same way you scared Yangyang and Kunhang,” you joked. Then, panic flooded your veins as you quickly went to tack on, “I’m not like, obsessed, by the way, I just really like your music, and it was a big inspiration for me to switch from classical to—”
Kun started laughing again, waving his hands in front of him to try to calm you down. “I believe you, I believe you. It’s okay, I swear, I believe you.”
“Oh thank god,” you groaned, covering your face with both hands.
“You’re a lot better than I ever was.” He dropped off the stage, starting to set up the stools around the perimeter of the floor.
“What?! No!” You immediately argued.
“You improved on what I wrote, I heard it. That little—” he imitated part of the melody you had been playing, the fingers of one hand tapping imaginary keys in the air. “—that you changed in the bridge. I like it.”
“I was just messing around waiting for them to get back with the food, I wasn’t—”
“It’s good,” he insisted. “You’re good, Y/N.”
“So were you,” you muttered, futzing with the knobs on your instrument.
“Could you do me a favor?”
“Huh?”
“Don’t mention any of this to my employees.”
“What? They don’t know?”
“No.” He shook his head. “They know I’ve been around the scene for a while, they know I can play, that’s it.”
“Why?”
He shrugged. “Will you do that for me?”
“Yeah, sure, Kun.” You weren’t sure what sudden surge of confidence possessed you in that moment, but you picked the CD up off your keyboard. “If you’ll sign this for me.”
He blinked. “What?”
“You’ve got a Sharpie around here, right?”
“Yeah, in the-in the office.” He pointed over his shoulder.
You hopped off the stage, looking at him expectantly. He led the way through the venue in a bit of a daze, until you got to a door at the end of a cramped hallway. Kun ushered you into the back office, and you tried to ignore how fast your heart was going as you stepped inside. You’d never been in the admin office of Venue:Hell, only ever the main floor area, stage, and backstage.
The walls were plastered in album covers, most of which you recognized. A small futon was pushed against one wall while a desk and office chair were cramped into another corner. Kun dug through a cup of pens sitting on the desk until he had secured a black Sharpie.
“Seriously?” He double-checked with you.
“Seriously.” You pushed the plastic case into his hands.
He chuckled, uncapping the Sharpie with his teeth before quickly scrawling his signature in the bottom right corner. He fanned it a couple times to dry the ink, then handed it back to you.
“15-year-old me would be geeking out right now,” you beamed down at the fresh signature.
Kun spat the Sharpie cap back out onto the desk. “Fifteen?! We always played at 18-plus venues!”
You snickered. “Bold of you to think that I couldn’t get my hands on a fake ID, or that most of those places were actually carding in the first place.”
“Point taken,” he groaned.
“Anyway, your secret’s safe with me.” You made a motion of zipping up your lips and throwing away the key. “And the rest of my band. I kind of already told them.”
“As long as they don’t say anything either.”
“I’ll make sure they know.”
“Thank you.”
“Thank you,” you echoed, shaking the CD case. “What? Why are you looking at me like that?”
Kun shook his head, gesturing towards the door. “Nothing. Good luck tonight, Y/N.”
“Right. Thanks!” You opened the office door.
On the other side was Yangyang, who glanced between the two of you suspiciously. “Oh. Y/N. What were you doing in there? With the door shut?”
You kept the CD tucked between your arm and your side. “Had some questions about the weekly slot.”
With that, you practically skipped away, giving the sound tech no further opportunities to ask questions. Of you, at least.
Kun approached the stage from the floor as you all were doing your soundcheck for your final night at Venue:Hell. He waited patiently for you to finish the song that you were on. When he saw that you all had removed your in-ears, he spoke up.
“Got word from Roses,” he started. “They’re going to be moving to every other week when they get back. How would you guys like to alternate the weekly slot with them? My staff and regulars all really like you, we’d love to keep you on. Talk about it, let me know by Wednesday?”
He didn’t wait for an answer from you all, pivoting back around on his heel to take care of whatever else was on his never-ending checklist. The five of you looked at each other, and you already knew the answer. Chenle and Jisung high-fived while Jungwoo hastily took his bass off to grab you and spin you around. You yelped and laughed, half-heartedly smacking his back to get him to put you down as he nearly crashed the both of you into Mark and his instrument.
At your first performance as a semi-permanent fixture around Venue:Hell, you were antsy as soon as you entered the basement, looking around expectantly.
“I’ll be back in a sec,” you told your friends over your shoulder as you left them on the main floor.
“Where are you going?” Mark called after you.
“I just want to see if Kun’s here, I want to tell him thanks for keeping us on.”
Knowing jeers and snickers sprang up behind you, but you ignored them, walking down the cramped hallway to the admin office. The door at the end was ajar, and you ducked around a precariously perched box of t-shirts to grab the door handle.
Through the crack, you could hear someone humming a faint melody. It wasn’t any song that you knew, but you did stop to listen for probably longer than you should have. You couldn’t help it, you were curious. Finally, when you started feeling like maybe a bit too much of a creep, you knocked softly, pushing the door open even more.
“Yeah?” Kun called out.
You poked your head in. “Hey.”
He looked over at you from the computer screen, nodding for you to enter the office fully. “Y/N, what can I do for you?”
“What song is that?”
“Huh?”
“That you were just humming, what is it? It’s nice.”
“It’s nothing,” he brushed it off. “Just a tune I’ve got in my head.”
“You’re still writing songs?” You asked eagerly.
“No. I haven’t in quite a few years.”
“Really? You stayed around the scene, I figured you might’ve at least had a notebook somewhere? Lyrics in your notes app? Some demos recorded on your phone?” After each one, he shook his head, and your hopeful gaze fell more and more. “Nothing?”
“Nope.”
“Huh.” You sat on the desk next to the computer keyboard, loosely crossing your arms over your chest as you tried to absorb that information. “Do you miss it at all?”
“Writing songs or performing?”
“Any of it.”
“Bits and pieces, yeah,” Kun admitted, leaning back into the office chair. “I wouldn’t go back, though.”
You tilted your head. “Why not?”
“We were broke, for one thing.” He laughed. “Don’t get me wrong, the excitement of having all those what-ifs in front of you, it was awesome. And I do miss the music. But I also like my life now just fine.”
“I didn’t mean to put down what you’re doing now, by the way,” you added. “I was just curious.”
Kun’s eyes crinkled as he smiled up at you warmly. “It’s okay, I didn’t take it like that. I thought I was going to be in the band forever too.”
You looked down at your lap, thinking about your own band, and felt an uncomfortable pressure pushing down on your chest.
“So, did you come in here for anything specific? Or to just watch me create the employee schedule for next month?”
“As thrilling of an offer as that is,” you chuckled, “I did have a real reason. I wanted to say thanks for offering us this slot. We’re all really grateful for the opportunity.”
He nodded thoughtfully. “You’re welcome. I’m glad that you guys accepted. I hope Venue:Hell can be the starting point for much more.”
“Thanks.” You stood back up, showing yourself out. You nearly slammed into Yangyang on the other side, though, and jumped back in shock. “Jesus fucking Christ, Yangyang! Why are you always in the damn hallway?!”
“Why are you always in the office?!” He retorted, just as exasperated.
You rolled your eyes and shouldered past him.
You had settled into your biweekly sets at Venue:Hell, becoming familiar with the staff, regulars, and rhythm of the venue. A private event was renting out the space tonight, so your set had gotten moved way up, to the early evening. You didn’t mind, it meant that instead of arriving after dark, you arrived before sunset.
Kun was out setting up the stools and tables around the perimeter of the floor when you all entered the building, and gave you a wave of acknowledgement over his shoulder.
“Do you live here or something?” Chenle asked. “I’ve never seen another car out there, and you’re literally always here.”
“I might as well,” the manager mused, continuing to set up.
“Pretty sure he’s a vampire,” Jungwoo laughed. “Never seen him out in daylight.”
“Very original,” Kun replied dryly. “I’m wearing all black, I work underground…”
“You’re old!” Ten interjected from what sounded like backstage.
“I sign your checks!” He immediately barked back.
“Uh, guys?” You looked at your bandmates pointedly. “I think the call is coming from inside the house?”
They all looked down at their own dark outfits and various smatterings of tattoos and piercings, muttering among themselves before walking off. You shook your head, following after them.
The performance itself was smooth like usual, some different faces in the crowd than usual, which you chalked up to the different time. You swore you saw Kun standing in the back of the venue with someone, but they were too far back and shrouded in shadows for you to be sure. After your set, you all couldn’t hang around like usual, having to pack up everything and get out so the private event could start setting up.
Your bandmates had already taken everything else out to the van, you were the only one left in the green room, gathering up the last of your stuff to bring out. You had just finished packing one duffel bag and were stuffing another when there was a light knock on the doorway.
“Y/N, you’re still here.” It was Kun, followed by another man that you only saw out of the corner of your eye.
“Sorry, I’m almost gone,” you promised, rushing even more now.
“First, I’d like you to meet someone.” Kun’s words made you slow down, looking up properly as he gestured to the tall man with him, inked from neck to fingertip. The heavy tattoos and time didn’t make it any harder for you to place the face, though, before Kun had finished the introductions, “Johnny, this is Y/N, she plays keys in Doing this Again! Y/N, this is Johnny, he—”
“—was your drummer in Vizions,” you finished, wide-eyed.
Johnny’s eyebrows went up before his face relaxed into an easy-going smile. “Damn, I thought Kun was bullshitting when he said he’d found a fan of ours.”
“No, I’m real,” you shook your head and laughed.
“Well, I’m honored.” Johnny beamed, holding a CD case and Sharpie out to you. “Would you mind?”
“Huh?” You stared down at the items in confusion. It was your band’s CD, a new press that was available at the venue’s merch table.
“Kun invited me out to see your set. I’m a fan of yours now. I’d be stoked if you could sign my album.”
You looked between Kun and Johnny uncertainly. Kun smiled encouragingly, mouthing ‘go ahead’ at you. That was the final push you needed to take the disc and pen. Your hands shook as you signed across the plastic CD case, and you hoped it hadn’t messed up your signature too much.
“Thanks.” He took both back, fanning the CD to dry the ink. “If you’ll excuse me, I’m going to check out the bar now. It was an honor meeting you, Y/N.”
“Y-You too, Johnny.” You shook the hand that he had offered, his palm noticeably calloused. “Thank you.”
That left you and Kun in the green room now, and you plopped down exactly where you stood, wrapping your arms around your knees and burying your face in your legs to muffle your screams. Kun chuckled as he patted you on the head.
“Woah, you alright?”
You glared up at him. “How could you do that to me?”
“Do what?” He asked, still laughing. “I thought you liked our band?”
“Yes, but you can’t jumpscare me with your former bandmates!” You whined, hiding your face again.
“If I had told you Johnny was coming tonight, you would’ve been freaked out before going on stage.”
You huffed. Unfortunately, he was right.
“I’m going to take your silence as admission that I’m right.” After another long stretch of silence, Kun added, “He was being sincere, you know. He really did like your set, bought your CD with his own money.”
You pulled your head up, resting your cheek on your knee. “Let me guess—Getting me to sign it was your idea?”
“All him.” At your suspicious squint, Kun smiled, “Johnny likes supporting new acts on the scene. And why is it so hard for you to believe that people actually think you’re good?”
You let out a drawn-out sigh. “Typical—My parents don’t.”
He squatted down in front of you to be eye level with you. “What did they want you to do?”
“My dad started teaching me piano ever since I could sit on his lap and press the keys. They wanted me to do classical,” you commiserated. “The first time I said no to a recital, I thought the world was going to explode.”
“Did it?”
“No. They didn’t get mad, or yell, or force me to do it anyway. It was so… anti-climactic. I had this big idea of teen rebellion in my head, I guess.” You let out another heavy sigh. “But they’ve never supported me since I started doing this. When I bought my first keyboard, Mark had to help me carry it home from the music store. They’ve never come to a single gig, never even ask how it’s going. When I do talk about it, they don’t say anything, just wait for me to stop talking. They just… pretend like it’s not real.”
“If you all don’t talk about your music, what do you talk about?”
“When I’m going to choose a career path, or get married. Pretty much those two things.”
“I’m sorry your parents don’t support you, Y/N. That sucks, and I won’t take that away.” Kun squeezed your forearm, resting his hand there. “I’m sure you know this, but it doesn’t hurt hearing it again—You’re good, really good, whether or not they acknowledge it. And I hope you let yourself see that.”
You couldn’t quite smile, but blinked slowly, and nodded in acknowledgment. “Thanks, Kun.”
“Here,” he stood up, grabbing one of the duffel bags and slinging it over his shoulder, “I’ll help you with your stuff.”
His words had made you feel a little better, but you were slow to move, still self-pitying. Kun held both his hands down for you. “Come on. Normally, I’d let you pout all night, but other people have rented this space and that contract did not come with a pouting keyboardist.”
You reluctantly put your hands in his, letting him pull you to your feet.
“So yeah, that’s what Retro Rewind is gonna be like,” you finished brightly, looking between your parents hopefully. “Do you think you think you can make it? I-I don’t expect you to stay the whole time, but we’ll be going on first, so just for our set? Maybe?”
Your mom pushed around food on her plate, eyes trained on her dish. Your father took another bite of his food, washing it down with a sip of water. The only sounds in the room were of your breathing, and utensils occasionally scraping against plates. With every passing second, the shame that usually forced you into quietly changing the topic transformed into a white-hot rage, the kind that made you feel like a teapot that was about to boil over, steam bursting from your ears as they went on ignoring you.
“Hey!” You yelled, gripping your utensil tighter. “Look at me!”
Your mother finally met your gaze, her features stern. “Quiet down.”
“I asked a question. Are either of you going to answer it?”
“You do not speak to your mother like that,” your father interjected furiously.
“Well, I’m the one doing all of the talking here, I thought I could speak however I like,” you retorted.
Your mom tried again, “Y/N, please—”
“Please what?” You stared her down. “I try to engage you guys in conversation and keep you updated on my life and get shut down every single time, but I still try the next time anyway. All I’m asking, for once, is that you acknowledge—”
“Acknowledge what exactly?” Your dad snapped, a vein in his forehead popping out. “All you do is recount grimy basement after grimy basement, events that don’t pay you, long stretches of time where you’re not even booked, clearing out your savings to record an album with no label to distribute it. What accomplishments, exactly, are we supposed to be acknowledging?”
You held his eye contact, clenching your jaw so tight it felt like your teeth might break.
“We wanted the best for you, sweetie,” your mom added weakly. “Concert halls, opera houses… not this.”
Broiling hot tears stung your eyes as you stood up, pushing your chair back with a blood-curdling screech of the legs against the floor. You swallowed down the sharp thorny thing growing in your throat enough to speak, “All I wanted was for you guys to listen to me. I didn’t realize you have been. It turns out you just hate what you’ve been hearing.”
Your mom cast her eyes back down to her plate as your father grabbed his glass, lifting it to his lips to drink, his eyes focused on something in the middle distance, looking right through you. The chair was knocked over entirely in your hurry to get the fuck out of there, and the doorframe shook and rattled as you slammed their front door closed behind you.
Running down the sidewalks, your feet pounded the pavement like it had done you wrong, and you took hiccupping gulps of air as tears streaming down your face. When you tripped over a crack in the sidewalk and narrowly avoided skinning your entire face only by skinning your hands instead, you finally slowed down. You hissed in pain as you looked down at your bloodied hands, then up at your surroundings. The street you were on was somewhat familiar. You should be about ten minutes from the venue.
A rather miserable but not terribly long walk later, you were at the backdoor to Venue:Hell. Fumbling your keys from your pocket, you unlocked the door, shutting off the alarm that you were very thankful to know the code to. You washed your hands off in the sink of the women’s bathroom. After drying them with probably too many paper towels, you could see that the bleeding had stopped, and the skin there would just be a bit raw for a little while.
Walking back out to the main floor, your keyboard was still set up on stage from your set last night. Without another thought, you were hopping up onto the stage and turning on the equipment. You needed to do something. Completely ignoring your usual warm-ups, you went right into the most vitriolic, hardcore song that you could think of, uncaring of how hard you were bringing your fingers down against the keys. In fact, the repetitive blunt force sort of felt nice against your bones. A different sort of pain than the anguish tearing through your chest, at least. You lost track of time, only thinking about the music blaring out of the speakers and shaking through you.
“Y/N?!” Kun entered the main floor from the direction of the stairs, plugging one ear. “Y/N!”
You immediately stopped playing. “Oh. Kun.”
“I got a notification that the alarm was set off, and nobody responded to my text saying it was them, so I figured I’d stop by…”
You took your phone out of your pocket. There was in fact a text from Kun from twenty minutes ago in the Venue:Hell groupchat, asking if anybody was at the venue right now, followed by several ‘no’s from the venue staff, other members of your band, and Roses for Eyes.
“Sorry,” you muttered.
He took another moment to look you over, then sighed. “Alright, come on.”
“What?”
“You’re going to break your keyboard like that.” He hopped up onto the stage, shutting off your keyboard and all the other sound equipment. “Come on.”
Interest piqued, and with nothing better to do, you followed him. Kun turned off all the lights and set the building alarm before locking up behind you. He took a sharp turn down the alley that your band normally parked your van in. The two of you walked in silence, which you were grateful for. If he tried to press you on your sour mood, you were sure you’d snap at him and just feel even worse.
Just a couple minutes later, and you were at an apartment building. Kun held the front door open for you, then the door to the stairwell. After an arduous hike up the fourth floor, you stopped in front of an apartment. He unlocked it, and led you inside.
“Is this your place?” You asked, toeing off your shoes by the front door as he did.
“Yup.” Kun pointed to the kitchen sink. “Wash your hands.”
With that, he disappeared further into the apartment. As you washed your hands, you looked around. From where you were, you could see the kitchen and adjacent living room. It wasn’t a very big space, only one bedroom if you had to guess, but Kun kept it tidy. A few vintage framed band posters were on the living room walls that you had walked past to get to the kitchen, and he had a nice plush-looking couch.
Kun returned as you were finishing drying off your hands. You looked at him expectantly. “Now what?”
He guided you over to a countertop, where he had a bunch of graham crackers double-bagged in two ziploc plastic bags. He held a rolling pin out to you. “I need these crushed into small crumbs.”
It felt good to swing the rolling pin down, to watch the cracks form in the crackers as they burst apart, then became smaller and smaller as you kept hitting them. Rolling the rolling pin along the bag would probably be more efficient, but this was more fun. Kun, for his part, said nothing about the noise as you repeatedly whacked the bag over and over with loud bangs. He was busy with something else, you didn’t really care—your attention was fully on the crackers. By the time the crackers were a fine dust, you had worked up a sweat, but the raging tension in your muscles was no more. You were still pissed, of course, but no longer had the itch to slash somebody’s tires at least.
Kun came by to review your handiwork. “Good. Dump that in the bowl, then do the other ones.”
You obliged, opening the bags and shaking out the crumbs into a metal mixing bowl before refilling the bags with a new box of graham crackers. With the bags zipped back up, you went back to work obliterating the crackers inside. You didn’t even realize somebody was knocking on Kun’s front door until he was opening it, and you heard an unfamiliar man’s voice.
“What the fuck, man? Are you doing fucking construction in there?”
“You’re complaining about noise right now?”
“Yeah, I’m trying to fucking sleep.”
“It’s two in the afternoon.”
“Keep it. The fuck. Down.”
“Get out of my fucking face.”
“Whatever. Just keep it down.”
Kun quietly shut the door, calmly doing his locks and deadbolts back up. You looked between the rolling pin in your hands and the crackers guiltily. He wordlessly pulled out his phone, and with a few taps, a hard rock song was playing out of speakers in his living room at full volume.
He rejoined you in the kitchen, having to raise his voice as he explained, “Downstairs neighbor. I can hear him and his girlfriend fucking or fighting every night. Sometimes at the same time.”
You burst into laughter, turning back around to take another swing at the graham crackers. Once those ones looked pulverized enough, you dumped them into the bowl too.
“Done?” Kun asked.
“Yep!” You nodded. “So, what is this for, anyway?”
“Cheesecake bars.” He slid the bowl over to him, pouring melted butter in and mixing them together. “This is the crust.”
“Ooh, sounds good.”
He placed a square glass baking dish in front of you. “Press the graham cracker into an even layer on the bottom.”
You did as he instructed, singing along to the next song that had started playing as you worked. Meticulously smushing the crust into the bottom of the dish, you squinted as you tried to figure out if it was even or not. As your focus increased, your singing dropped out, and you realized that there was another voice humming in the kitchen too, almost unintelligible past the loud music. You looked up from the crust to where Kun was mixing something in another bowl, his attention fully on that. Your ears strained to catch more of his voice.
Then his sharp gaze was on you, eyebrows raising inquisitively. “Done?”
“Yeah, I think.” You straightened up to let him take a look.
He gave it his nod of approval before popping the dish into the pre-heated oven. Kun went back to the other bowl, cracking two eggs into it. You followed him to that corner of the kitchen, hopping up onto the countertop next to the stand mixer. He gave you a brief look of intrigue before continuing on with his task. He secured the bowl in the stand mixer then turned it on. You watched with interest as the ingredients were incorporated together. Kun stopped it, scraping down the sides with a spatula and adding more ingredients before turning it back on. Finally, he stopped the mixer again and took the bowl and attachment from it. He handed you the mixing attachment that had just been in the batter, covering the bowl with plastic wrap and putting it in the fridge.
When he turned around to see you still dutifully holding the attachment, he pointed to it, “You can clean it off. We won’t need it again.”
You didn’t need to be told twice, taking your finger and scooping off a big chunk of batter. It was pleasantly sweet and creamy, and you eagerly licked off the rest. The sink was in arm’s reach, and you leaned forward to deposit the now-clean(ish) mixer attachment in with the rest of the dirty dishes.
Kun rolled his sleeves up to his elbows as he turned the tap on, and you shamelessly ogled his hands and forearms as he washed the dishes. Despite being in the scene for so long, he only had one tattoo between the two areas, an abstract ink swirl that started on his his right pinky finger and flowed around his arm and disappeared into his shirt. You remembered that tattoo from all the concerts you’d attended, watching these same hands play the electric keyboard.
When he held a soaking wet dish out towards you, you blinked at it, startled from your nostalgic reverie. A drop of water dripped off and onto your leg, making you panic and take the bowl from him. “Fine—Ack! It’s wet!”
“Towel’s on the oven door next to you.” He indicated with his gaze before going back to washing.
You grabbed the dish towel from its place hanging off the oven door, hastily drying both the bowl and your own hands. Another song came on that you knew, and you hummed along to the introductory guitar riff as you dried the next dish Kun handed you. As the actual vocals came in and you started singing too, you could hear Kun had started humming as well.
Pushing on his shoulder, you got an incredulous look in return, but simply grinned and pushed more insistently as you sung louder. He shook his head and poured more soap on the spatula he was cleaning.
You pushed his shoulder a third time, taking a guitar solo as an opportunity to say, “Come on, Kun. I know you can sing. And I know you’re not afraid of getting a noise complaint.”
“I haven’t performed in years—”
“You’re not performing! You’re singing with me while doing the dishes!” You gestured at said dishes zealously. “Please?”
He remained silent, then the guitar solo was over, and he joined in when the singer on the recording came back in. You were so surprised that actually worked that you ended up missing the cue, which Kun immediately noticed. He pinched your thigh, and you jerked your leg away from him with a pout, but started singing with him nevertheless. Kun had only ever done background vocals in his band, but you’d listened to that CD so many times that you knew every layer of sound, every adlib, every second of every song by heart. That’s how you could also immediately tell that Kun’s voice had matured in the years since they’d recorded that album. He’d already told you that he was out of practice, but even if he wasn’t maybe hitting all the notes perfectly, there was something richer about his voice now that left you wanting this song to last forever.
Right as he passed you the last utensil, the timer on the oven beeped, and Kun dried his hands off to attend to that, ending your sing-along. He took the cooked crust from the oven, setting it on a cooling rack. After adjusting the oven temperature, he brought the cheesecake batter back out from the fridge, pouring it over the crust. Kun put it back in the oven and set the timer again.
“Fifty minutes,” he informed you.
You swung your feet. “So what are we going to do for fifty minutes? Other than blast music to piss your neighbor off?”
Kun walked into the living room, and you hopped off the counter to follow him. He paused the music on his phone and sat on the couch, picking up the remote from the coffee table, turning on the TV, then tossing the remote at you. “You pick.”
You sat down on the couch too, quickly trying to figure out all the buttons on his TV remote. A few minutes of unsuccessfully scrolling through streaming services later, and you turned it back off with a huff. “I don’t want to watch anything. Can’t we just—I don’t know, talk or something?”
“Sure.” Kun shifted, leaning back against the armrest. “You guys have your setlist for Retro Rewind yet?”
“Ugh—Not about work,” you groaned, dropping your face into your hands.
“Okay… Do you feel better?”
“Huh?”
“Y/N, I walked in on you Phantom-of-the-Opera-ing your keys this afternoon. You looked one chandelier away from burning our shitty opera house down,” he said frankly. “I won’t ask about what—But do you feel better now? Even a little?”
The mention of Retro Rewind and opera houses brought your conversation with your parents back to you, and you pressed the heels of your palms hard into your eyes to banish the thoughts, to keep living in this nice time now with Kun. You nodded. “Yeah. I do. Thanks, Kun.”
“Good.”
“I got lunch with my parents.” You stared down at your feet. “This whole time I thought they weren’t listening to me… They were, they just wish I was somebody else. They really think I’m a fucking failure.”
“Shit…” He breathed out, scooting over to rest a hand on your shoulder.
You let out a sharp laugh, lolling your head around to look over at him. “That’s it?”
“You don’t need me to tell you I’m proud of you. You’re a kick-ass musician without me or your parents.”
“Can you tell me anyway?” You mumbled.
Kun chuckled, stroking your hair. “I’m proud of you.”
His praise made you feel warm, especially with the gentle hand still petting your hair and his playful but genuine gaze fully focused on you. You suddenly had never wanted a man more in your life.
You tilted your head curiously, “Wait, you said your neighbor and his girlfriend are always…”
“Fucking and fighting,” he repeated for you, hand resting on the nape of your neck. “At all hours of the night. At least the nights I’m here, you know.”
“Have you ever gotten payback?”
Kun took a millisecond too long to point to the speakers, as if he’d caught on but wanted to see if you’d really go for it. “I just did…”
“No, I mean…” You stood up, leaning over him and grabbing the back of the couch next to his shoulder, ignoring the roadburn on your palm. “Ever given him a proper taste of his own medicine? Fucking and fighting…”
He calmly watched you. “I haven’t.”
“Do you want to? We don’t even have to fight after.”
“You just got in a fight with your parents, I’m someone older that you used to look up to—”
“Diagnosing me with daddy issues, nice,” you snickered derisively, caging him in with your other arm. “Maybe it’s that. Maybe I feel shitty and want to feel good. Maybe I think you’re like the hottest man I know, and we have at least forty minutes until those cheesecake bars are ready.”
“Forty minutes isn’t a lot of time,” Kun mused.
“Oh?”
His eyes flicked down to your lips, then back up to yours. “You sure?”
You answered by crashing your mouths together, every nerve in your body coming to life. Kun grabbed your waist, encouraging you to sit on his lap. He let out a groan into the kiss when your hips pressed down against his, guiding you to do it again. You wrapped your arms around his neck, tangling the fingers of one hand in the hair at the back of his head, pulling every so often. He kept the rhythm of your hips as he kissed and nipped a wet trail from your mouth under your jaw and down your neck. He bit down harder at the junction of your neck and shoulder, soothing over the indents of his teeth with his lips and tongue. You were already letting out needy, obscene noises and all your clothes were still on. At this rate, his neighbor would never sleep.
“Ah! That tickles!” You giggled, trying to push Kun’s hands away as they crept under your (his) shirt and skimmed over your sides.
Kun’s chest shook against yours as he laughed, hands continuing to explore your skin again. “Sorry, baby. I can’t help it, I’ve got a fucked out, pretty girl in my lap.”
“And whose fault is that?”
“You want to play the blame game right now?”
The hint of chastisement in his tone made you shift unconsciously on top of him, leaning in to kiss him again. He indulged you, hand coming up to cup your cheek as his tongue slipped into your mouth. You had just grabbed his hand and started guiding it lower when a faint jingle rang in the background, past the blood roaring in your ears and lewd sounds of you two kissing.
Kun pulled away with a regretful sigh, planting one more lingering kiss on your lips before whispering, “The cheesecake bars.”
“No,” you whined, dragging out the ‘o’ as you pulled his mouth back to yours.
“Yes,” he mimicked you, also dragging out his vowel in a petulant tone. Kun flipped the two of you over, depositing you on the couch and taking advantage of your surprise to loosen your arms around his neck and stand up. He stretched his arms over his head, walking into the kitchen.
You slumped into the couch cushions, opting to rest your eyes for the moment. You could hear Kun turn the timer off, open the oven door, and take the pan out before setting it on the cooling tray. Then, his footsteps reentered the living room, and you peeked your eyes open again.
Kun stopped in front of you on the couch, tucking his hands into his sweatpants as he looked down at you. With you wearing his shirt, you could very clearly see his other sporadic tattoos on his bare torso—over his hip bone, ribs, one on his inner bicep, shoulder, and you knew there was one on the back of his neck too. He cocked his head as he looked down at you. “Taking a nap?”
“Yes. Honk shoo mimimi.”
“That’s too bad. The cheesecake bars have to cool for one to two hours.”
You sat up straight. “I can nap later.”
He offered his hand. “Come on, I’m fucking you in a bed this time.”
“Couch isn’t so good for your old bones?” You teased, accepting his hand as you went to stand up. Your legs wobbled, and you only stayed upright because you were already holding Kun and used him for balance.
“I don’t think I need to say anything,” he snickered, pulling you closer until your back was against his chest. “Let’s go, my pretty girl deserves a real pillow.”
Kun reentered his bedroom with a plate stacked high with cheesecake bars and glass of water. You smiled as he sat down in front of you, insistently handing you the water first. You gulped down half of it in one go before reaching for a cheesecake bar.
As soon as you bit into it, you groaned in appreciation. “So good.”
“Do you always make obscene noises when you eat?” Kun scoffed.
“Sorry,” you mumbled through another mouthful. “‘S really good.”
You held the rest of the cheesecake bar in your hand out to him. He wrapped his hand around yours, holding it still for him to lean forward and wrap his lips around your fingertips, taking the food in one bite. You watched him, unblinking.
When he finally let your hand go, you were snapped from your trance. “Now who’s being obscene while eating?”
He laughed, covering his mouth to keep crumbs from flying out.
Noticing that it had gotten darker out, you glanced at the time on his bedside clock. “Do you have to go to the venue tonight?”
“No, I’m off today.” He squeezed your thigh. “Not kicking you out.”
You looked down at his hand on your leg, your fingers tracing his ink up along his arm. There was a small clink as he set the plate down on the nightstand, then he was tilting your chin up so you’d look him in the eye. You twisted your head out of his gentle grip, looking back down, away from his too-intense gaze.
“You’re pouting again, baby,” he stated, breaking the long stretch of silence.
“Maybe so,” you admitted with a huff. “It’s my thinking face.”
“And what are you thinking about?”
“What—” Your throat closed up as your brain was going too fast for your mouth to keep up with. You decided to pick a simultaneously simpler yet much harder question, “Now what?”
Kun raised an eyebrow. “I need you to be more specific, because I don’t think you’re asking about dinner.”
“That’s what I mean! Are we going to eat dinner together? Or is that too much? Is it going to be just work from now on or like… something else? Some people just know but I don’t! I don’t know anything and I can’t do that!” You covered your face with your hands to hide your tears from him, embarrassed at your outburst, embarrassed to be young and insecure and having the ‘what are we’ talk right after sleeping with an older guy, embarrassed to be crying in front of him, embarrassed, embarrassed, embarrassed. God, that’s all you’d ever done since you’d met Kun, embarrassed yourself.
“Ah, Y/N,” Kun sighed, taking his hand back. “I’m too old for this shit. I thought you were awesome the first night we met. When I got to see you perform, then you told me about the arrangement you made. Even after I found out you knew about my old band, I tried to support you as crew because I figured you wouldn’t want to get tied down to an old flop like me.”
You sniffed, messily wiping your face on the sleeves of Kun’s hoodie that you were wearing. Finally meeting his eyes again, you said, “This whole time, you’ve been getting on me about not believing that I’m a good musician. Why can’t you believe that you were too? I haven’t seen a keyboard or anything around here, you don’t write songs anymore, don’t tell anybody about it at all, you won’t even sing while doing the dishes!”
He smiled bittersweetly and shrugged. “We didn’t make it.”
“You run an underground punk venue, you should know that success doesn’t equal skill!” You insisted. “Or are you the exception for some reason?”
“You… are probably right. It seems I have some esteem issues to work on as well,” he acquiesced.
“You’re not a flop, at least not to me. And even if you were, you’re a lot more than that too.” You crossed your arms. “Like, if anything, you’re just retired.”
“Okay, now that really makes me sound old.”
“Says the man who literally just said, quote: ‘I’m too old for this shit.’”
“About the petty relationship stuff.” He wrinkled his nose. “Retirement is just too far.”
You giggled at his reaction, and while he rolled his eyes, the corner of his lips twitched, betraying his amusement too.
“Let me be even clearer then,” Kun declared, sandwiching one of your hands between both of his. “If you want something—a relationship—I’m all yours.”
You practically launched yourself at him, throwing your arms around his neck and locking your lips together. He let out a noise of surprise, wrapping his arms around your waist to steady you nevertheless. You mumbled ‘mine’ against his mouth, to which he immediately nodded, cradling the back of your head and pulling you closer. He slowly eased back onto his elbows, encouraging you to straddle his hips as his thumbs stroked the bare skin of your thighs. You grabbed his shoulders, pushing him flat to the mattress as you disconnected from the kiss, sitting up higher to look down at him. He looked up at you, arching an eyebrow as he stayed down.
“Now what, pretty girl?” He questioned.
“Say it again?” You requested sweetly, leaning down to kiss his throat.
“I’m all yours.” The words vibrated under your lips, and you moved back up to kiss them right out of his mouth.
“Welcome home.” Mark was sitting on your couch when you got back to your own apartment the following afternoon, feet kicked up on the coffee table as his fingers flitted over a video game controller.
“Feet!” You reminded him loudly, throwing the front door closed.
Your roommate removed his feet from the coffee table, sitting forward with his elbows on his knees instead. He kept his eyes on the TV screen as you walked by. “So where were you?”
“I told you, I had lunch with my parents.”
“All night?” He snorted.
“You’re a smart boy, I’m sure you can figure it out.”
You went into your room to change out of your outfit from yesterday. You had already showered at Kun’s place but definitely needed some fresh clothes. Emerging from your room in a new set of pajamas, you plopped down onto the couch and stretched your legs into Mark’s lap.
“You usually give me a heads-up in case the guy’s an axe murderer,” Mark commented, shifting to accommodate your feet. “Were you wearing a crew hoodie for the venue when you walked in?”
“We work there?” You pointed out rather than admitting that it was actually Kun’s. “Anyway, sorry I forgot to text you. He wasn’t an axe murderer, by the way.”
“Figured as much when you came back with your head attached.”
When his character onscreen died, you snickered. “You suck.”
He turned the TV off, sitting back as he asked, “How’d lunch go?”
“Awful. They finally said the quiet part out loud: They think I’m a failure and will never support me doing this,” you sighed.
Mark winced, but nodded sympathetically, more than familiar with your strained family relationship. “Damn, I’m sorry, Y/N. I really thought they would’ve come around by now.”
You shrugged. “Yeah, it fucking sucks. But we’re really good, even if they’ll never come to a show.”
“Hell yeah!” He offered a hand out, and you smacked yours against it in a resounding high-five. “Ooh, hey, a couple of the guys from RFE told me about this guitar shop that I wanted to check out. Do you want to come? We can get dinner after?”
“Sure.”
Rock music played over the speakers of the guitar shop, guitars of all shapes and sizes covered the walls and displays, accented by the neon lights lining the floors and ceiling. You meandered with Mark, letting him gasp and gush over the instruments as you kept your hands to yourself, looking at the cool variety that was in stock.
“Anything in particular you guys are looking for?” The man that had been sat behind the glass counter called out as your path through the store brought you closer.
When you turned to look at him over your shoulder, intending to let him know that you all were just looking, he lifted his head from where he had been replacing the string on an acoustic guitar, shifting his long hair from his face and granting you your first good look at his features. He had large sunglasses perched on his head, dark makeup around his eyes, his nails painted black, and thanks to the black bleach tie-dyed tank top he wore, you could see the chain and lock tattoo going around one of his biceps.
You screeched to a halt, desperately smacking Mark to make sure you weren’t seeing things. Your friend yelled and fought back, swatting at your hand. “Dude, what the hell?”
The worker was still looking at you, amused confusion on his face as he tilted his head curiously. “Is everything okay?”
“Sorry, this might be weird—Were you in a band like ten years ago?” You asked hesitantly, despite being very sure of the answer yourself.
Whatever he thought was going on, he clearly hadn’t been expecting that, looking pleasantly surprised as he sat up a bit straighter on his stool. “Yeah, actually. I—”
“You played bass, and your band was called Vizions,” you finished. “Yuta.”
Yuta chuckled. “Right on the money.”
“Seriously?” Mark’s eyes were popping out of his head.
“We saw you guys perform a few times, actually.” You pointed between you and your friend. “In like, high school.”
“High school?” Yuta must have had the same realization that Kun did, but just smirked. “Cool. You guys are actually not going to believe this, hold on—” He stood up, leaning over the counter to yell out towards another section of the store, “Hey! C’mere!”
A few moments later, another man came around the corner, looking a bit out of place. He was wearing a rainbow pastel checkered sweatervest over a white button-up shirt, with brown corduroy pants and sensible-looking tennis shoes. His light brown hair had soft waves as it was neatly cut and styled, and he pushed a pair of square clear-framed glasses up the bridge of nose. As he stopped at the counter near you, Mark, and Yuta, you could faintly make out the faded marks where he had let piercings close up in his eyebrows, nose, along the cartilage of his ears, and a few open ones on his earlobes that had no jewelry in them. The change in style threw you off for an extra second, but seeing him next to Yuta gave you enough context to place his face as well.
“TY!” You immediately named the newcomer.
He startled, but his features were immediately overcome by a bashful smile, blushing from his ears to his neck. “Please, Taeyong. Nobody calls me that anymore.”
“Right, sorry…”
“It’s fine…?”
“Oh, Y/N, and Mark,” you introduced both of you.
“They used to go to our gigs when they were in high school,” Yuta informed Taeyong with a grin.
Taeyong paused on this, letting out a short sigh. “As a teacher, I will say that I can’t condone that anymore… but we may or may not have had fakes in high school as well.”
You perked up. “You’re a teacher now?”
“Yes, I teach music at a primary school.”
“I own this place,” Yuta added, gesturing to the guitar store. “Do some songwriting on the side.”
“That’s so cool that you guys still do music stuff!” You said brightly.
“We’re not the only ones,” Taeyong said. “Kun, our keyboardist, he works at a music venue. The other two, not so much. Johnny, our drummer, he’s a tattoo artist, but he goes to so many gigs it’s like he never left the scene. And then Jaehyun…”
Both of them laughed, and you and Mark exchanged a glance as you were on the outside of the joke.
Taeyong continued, “Stay at home father of four.”
“That’s fucking crazy.” Mark shook his head.
“Well, that’s pretty much why Vizions is no more,” Yuta explained. “Jaehyun’s girlfriend got pregnant, and he wanted to be a dad more than he wanted to be a rockstar. We decided that was a good place to call it, and started doing our own stuff.”
You shot Mark a look. “If you leave the band because you knock a girl up, I’m going to kill you.”
He held his hands up defensively. “Woah! So not called for! And who was at some mystery guy’s house last night?”
“Shut up!”
“You brought it up first!”
Taeyong cut into your squabbling, “You guys have a band?”
“Yeah, it’s called ‘Doing this Again!’” You answered brightly, jabbing your elbow into Mark’s side to make sure he knew that you had won. “I play keys and do some vocals.”
“I play guitar and sing,” Mark added through gritted teeth. “We’ve got another guitar, drummer, and bass.”
“You got any upcoming shows?” Yuta asked.
“We uh, we actually have a recurring slot at Venue:Hell every other week,” you answered. “We rotate out with another band, Roses for Eyes. Our next set is this Thursday, but there’s a special event next month, Retro Rewind.”
Taeyong and Yuta exchanged a confused look before the shop owner spoke up. “Wait, Kun’s place?”
“Yeah, he’s the manager.”
“Have you told him you know about our band?”
You nodded. “He signed my CD.”
“You should’ve brought it,” Mark clicked his tongue regretfully.
“You still have one of our albums?!” Taeyong’s eyes went wide.
“She’s obsessed,” your roommate muttered.
“Shut up, no I’m not,” you hissed back, smacking his arm this time. “You say that like your first electric guitar wasn’t the same kind Taeyong had because you—”
Mark slapped a hand over your mouth. “It’s a good guitar!”
You stuck your tongue out, and he immediately jerked his hand back, wiping it on his pants. “Gross! God knows where that thing was last night. Do I need to get a shot or something?”
“I’m going to shave your head in your sleep.”
You entered the green room just enough to toss your bag onto the couch, then pivoted right around. “Be back!”
“Where are you going?” Jungwoo called after you.
“To piss!”
Walking right past the bathroom, you stopped outside the closed admin office door, knocking on it eagerly.
“If you’re Yangyang, figure it out yourself!” Kun’s annoyed voice rang out from inside.
You poked your head in, offering him a sheepish smile. “Bad time?”
The peeved look on his face faded, and he waved you in with a tired smile. “No, not at all. Perfect timing, actually.”
“Why’s that?” You quietly closed the door behind you, moving to lean against the desk.
“I was stressed out, and seeing you makes me feel better.”
“You’re in the same clothes as when I brought you lunch yesterday,” you observed suspiciously, then looked over at the rumpled pillow and blanket on the futon. “Did you sleep here?”
“We had these back-to-back events—”
“You live a block away!”
“I went home to shower—”
“But you couldn’t grab a change of clothes while you were there? Or sleep there?”
He rubbed the back of his neck guiltily. “Old habits, I guess.”
You tilted your head. “What?”
“After Vizions, when I first got hired, business at the venue wasn’t really great. The owner at the time let me crash here until I could afford my own place.” He stared at the old futon and chuckled, “Turns out the venue was failing because the owner was keeping everything for himself. When the current owners took over, they started paying me a living wage and suddenly I had an apartment and a real mattress.”
“Kun.”
He turned his gaze from the piece of furniture up to you. “Hm?”
“That’s not your life anymore,” you told him firmly. “No shitty boss, no shitty futon, none of that.”
“Ah, you’re right,” he sighed, then a sly smirk creeped across his lips. “I might be more inclined to sleep in my own bed if I had a pretty girl in it, though.”
“A pretty girl?” You echoed pointedly.
“Just one.” Kun picked up your hand to kiss the back of it. “Just you, pretty girl.”
“Are you closing?”
“Mhm. I can give you my key if you don’t want to wait around here after your set.”
“Is it a dance night?”
“Mhm.”
You closed your eyes as you thought, enjoying the feeling of him pressing more kisses to your hand and fingers. “I’ll hang out.”
“Can’t wait.”
When your eyes fluttered open, they landed on the futon again, and your mind was still stuck in that bygone era that Kun had told you about, after his band broke up. You squeezed his hand to get his attention. “I forgot to tell you—Mark and I went to this guitar shop the other day.”
Kun sat up to look at you as you spoke, keeping a gentle hold on your hand. “Oh yeah? He get anything?”
“A new capo, but uh, the shop was actually owned by Yuta.”
His eyebrows shot up in surprise. “Really?”
“And Taeyong was there too.”
“A two-for-one, huh? Lucky you,” he laughed, easing back into his office chair again. “I think you’re just missing Jaehyun now?”
“Yeah,” you nodded. “Kun, why did you make it sound like your band broke up because you guys didn’t make it? They told us about Jaehyun having kids…”
“It never felt right to me to blame the kids, or even Jaehyun.” Kun ran a hand through his hair.
You frowned. “I don’t think it’s blaming anybody to say that he wanted to be a dad more than he wanted to be a rockstar. That’s just… what being a person is like. One day you want to be one thing, and then something happens and you want to be something else.”
“You make some good points,” he admitted. “I’ve never thought of it like that.”
“Not just a pretty face, hm?” You teased, getting to your feet.
He stood up as well, pecking your cheek. “Never said you were, baby. Beauty and brains, of course.”
You grabbed the back of his neck, pulling his lips to yours. As his mouth moved with yours sweetly, one of his hands cupped your cheek, the cool metal of his rings resting against your skin. A timid knock came at the closed door, and he let out a low groan against your lips. As Kun pulled back to address whoever was at the door, you peppered barely-there kisses along his jaw and neck.
“If you’re Yangyang, fuck off!” He called out, grip tightening on your hip when you nipped just above the collar of his venue crew t-shirt, on the front of his throat.
“No, not Yangyang,” Yangyang replied, his voice garbled as he deepened it in an attempt to disguise it. “Uh, I’m uhm, Sicheng! Yangyang wanted me to ask you about—” He was cut off by a hacking cough, then resumed in his normal voice, though a little strained, “Fuck! God! How does he do that? Felt like I was deepthroating my own tongue! Ugh!”
You burst into laughter, immediately trying to muffle it behind your hands.
“Woah! You got a girl in there, Kun?” His shit-eating grin was audible through the door. “We always joked about what the futon was for, but I didn’t know you got down like that, old man! Do you want me to leave? ‘Cause like—”
“Yes, I would like for you to leave because you are giving me a migraine!” Kun finally cut him off loudly.
“Alright, alright! Don’t need to tell me twice!” Yangyang acquiesced. “Doing this Again is going to start their soundcheck soon, so maybe keep it down? Or don’t, it should actually be the perfect cover for any—”
“Liu Yangyang!”
“Bye!”
Finally, you could hear the sound of his footsteps retreating down the hallway, and lowered your hand from your mouth, letting out a few giggles. Kun wiped his face from forehead to chin, red with anger. You could even spot a vein on his neck that wasn’t always visible.
“I’m going to kill that boy one day,” he swore, crossing his arms over his chest.
“I think I understand vampires now.”
He blinked at you. “What?”
You poked his neck vein. “I get it…”
He grabbed your hand with both of his, bringing it down, away from his neck. “And on that very normal note, pretty girl, you have a soundcheck to do.”
“You love that I’m extremely normal and say very normal things,” you teased, heading towards the door.
Before you could make it, he tugged on your hand, bringing you back into his arms. He dipped his head to attach his lips to your neck, teeth finding a spot that had already been fading. He finished it off with one last tender kiss to the area.
“There,” he murmured. “We can match.”
“I am definitely late for soundcheck now,” you whispered, reaching for the doorknob behind you with one hand even as you pulled him in for one more kiss with the other.
“Have fun, baby.”
With one last peck, you opened the office door and slipped out. Amazingly, you didn’t bump into Yangyang in the hallway. Instead, you quite literally tripped over him turning the corner out of the hallway and into the main floor area.
“Shit! Sorry, Yang!” You apologized as you stumbled over the employee who was squatted down behind the wall.
“Wait, Y/N?!” He didn’t even seem to care that you had just knocked him to the floor, scrambling to get to his feet and follow you as you hurried towards the stage.
The rest of your band was already set up for soundcheck, tuning their instruments and making other tweaks.
“Bathroom’s over there,” Chenle deadpanned into his mic, pointing to the ladies’ room on the opposite side of the floor.
“I peed and then got caught up talking to Kun.” You jumped up onto the stage, grabbing your in-ears and pack that somebody had already gotten out for you. “You see, people can travel from one place to another using these things attached to our torsos called legs.”
Jisung giggled from behind you as Chenle rolled his eyes. Yangyang was still looking between you and the hallway, obviously bewildered.
“You were in there when I was talking to him?” Yangyang asked, face screwed up in confusion.
“Yeah.”
“Why didn’t you say anything?”
“There wasn’t anything for me to say?” You retorted, putting in one of your in-ears. “He was pissed at you, dude.”
“What were you guys talking about?”
“Retro Rewind.”
Jungwoo interrupted, “As thrilling as this play-by-play of Y/N’s conversation with Kun is, we’ve really got to start our soundcheck, Yang.”
“Sorry, yeah.” Yangyang shook his head, jumping over the ropes that served to divide the main floor from the crew-only entrance to backstage. He disappeared behind the curtain, emerging by his sound equipment just off-stage.
“Pizza?” Jisung suggested hopefully as soon as you all stumbled into the green room off the stage.
A chorus of agreeable sounds—varying from cheers to grunts—came from around the room, a new rush of energy pumping through your friends at the mention of food.
You packed your bag, but didn’t put your two cents in on the prospective pizza order. They ended up split on what restaurant to go to, and looked to you to be the tiebreaker.
You held your hands up. “I’m hanging out here. You guys will just have to play rock-paper-scissors or something.”
“You’re staying here?” Jungwoo cocked his head curiously.
“And I won’t be home tonight,” you told Mark specifically.
Mark’s jaw dropped. “He’s here?!”
“Who?” “What?” “Who are you talking about?” “Huh?” The others clambered around you two for a scrap of context.
“Y/N has been seeing a mystery guy who she swears is not an axe murderer, but she refuses to tell me anything about,” your roommate narrowed his eyes at you.
“God, it hasn’t even been a week, and you wonder why I don’t want to tell you anything,” you scoffed.
“Uh, sorry I don’t want you to get axe murdered, dude?”
“If I get axe murdered, you can get up at my funeral and say ‘I told her so.’”
“Come on.” It was surprisingly Chenle who saved you, grabbing Mark’s backpack and yanking him away from you. “I’m hungry and you’re taking too long.”
“Dude!”
Mark flailed as Jungwoo joined in, taking Mark’s hand in his to drag him along too. “Pizza!”
Jisung gave you a quiet wave goodbye as he followed the others, leaving you in a remarkably silent green room. You let out a deep sigh to calm yourself down, then walked out as well. Your bandmates made quick work of hauling Mark out, as you didn’t see or hear any of them when you stepped into the main floor. Keeping close to the wall, you sneaked around to the back office, intending on dropping off your bag before finding Kun. Instead, you found Yangyang in the office, nosing around for something.
“Uh, what are you doing?” You asked, plopping your bag onto the empty office chair.
Yangyang shot to his feet, spinning around to flash you an obviously guilty smile. “Oh, you’re still here.”
“Yeah, I’m hanging out for a bit,” you replied noncommittally. “What are you doing?”
“Close the door?”
You obliged, stepping and shutting the office door behind you. “Okay?”
“Promise not to tell Kun?”
“What are you doing? Booby trapping his office?”
“No, it’s not April Fools yet.”
“You’re going to booby trap his office for April Fools?”
“Pff, no!”
You arched an eyebrow in disbelief. “So what are you doing now?”
“Looking for proof,” he whispered, rubbing his hands together. “I’ve worked here for like three years and the old man’s never had a partner, talked about going on dates, brought anybody around, nothing. Now, in one week, he’s been late to work, come to work with hickeys, had somebody bring him food, has been smiling down at his phone instead of rolling his eyes at it—He’s humming, for fuck’s sake, Y/N! Humming! I’ve never seen him consistently in such a good mood since… ever!”
“Maybe that’s just because you piss him off all the time,” you pointed out.
“But the rest of it!”
“What kind of proof do you think you’re going to find in the office? His diary?” You snorted.
“Ooh, you think?”
You stared at him.
“You’re fucking with me,” he realized. “That’s not funny.”
You were already giggling. “It really is.”
Yangyang pushed the rolling chair out of the way to wake the computer up, cursing when he saw that it was locked.
“Anyway, why are you so pressed about Kun’s love life?” You questioned, watching Yangyang type in wrong password after wrong password.
“Aren’t you curious?” He asked. “I know you haven’t worked here as long, but the man is an enigma. After three years, I feel like I know as much about him as I did on my first day.”
“Have you tried talking to him? Since you’re so curious?”
“Have you?” He retorted, then his face lit up like he’d gotten an idea. He turned away from the computer that he still hadn’t unlocked. “Actually, you do talk to Kun, right? About like, your weekly slot and stuff at least, right?”
“Yeah…?” You answered hesitantly, unsure of where he was going with this.
Yangyang suddenly lunged forward to grab both your hands, smushing them between his as he pleaded with you. “Can you find out for us if he’s seeing anybody? Like, not be super obvious, but try to see if he’ll bring it up? Or say something about them?”
“‘Us?’” You repeated the one word that had caught your attention. “I take it the rest of the crew are in on this too?”
His eyes widened as he seemed to have realized his slip-up, then he grinned. “You’re clever, Kun won’t stand a chance. Thanks!”
“I didn’t say yes!” You yelled after him as he ran out of the office.
With a shake of your head, you walked out of the office as well, quietly shutting the door. Out on the main floor, you milled around for a little bit, ordering a drink from Sicheng at the bar before chatting with a few venue regulars about this and that.
“I’m excited for Retro Rewind,” Sunny, a regular who was a little younger than you, buzzed with excitement, and maybe a bit too much alcohol. “I love seeing you guys and Roses on the same night!” She suddenly gasped. “You should totally do a collab song or something! That would be fucking awesome!”
You laughed, endeared by her enthusiasm as always. “Could be fun. Those guys are pretty cool.”
“Oh my god, don’t look, but he’s totally looking over here!” Tsuki, the other regular that you were talking to, whisper-shouted over the music, grabbing her friend’s arm.
Sunny immediately whipped her head around rather obviously. You also peered around a bit more inconspicuously, curious as to who they were talking about. Sunny must have spotted whoever it was, as she squeaked and ducked her head again. The only person you met eyes with was Kun, who had finally stopped running around and was now calmly watching over the crowd from the back wall. You gave him a little smile before turning back to the two squealing girls in front of you.
“What’s going on?” You asked, swirling your drink around in your glass then taking a sip.
“Sunny thinks the manager is cute,” Tsuki giggled, much to the chagrin of her friend, who belatedly smacked a hand over her mouth.
You choked on the sip that you had just taken, barely avoiding snorting it back out your nose. Thumping yourself on the chest, you managed to swallow it down instead of doing a spit take all over the patrons. Tsuki only laughed even harder as Sunny covered her face.
“You didn’t have to laugh that much,” Sunny whined.
“Sorry, sorry,” you apologized quickly. “Not laughing, just uh, just went down the wrong pipe.”
“She’s just sensitive because I like to tease her about how she comes to a music venue and doesn’t even look at any of the acts, she looks at the manager,” Tsuki explained.
“It’s called practicality!” Sunny huffed, then looked at you hopefully. “Is he single? Do you know?”
“W-Well…” You stammered, trying to figure out what the hell you were even supposed to say right now.
“Oh, he’s totally like, married with five kids or something,” Tsuki snickered, making Sunny even more distraught.
“He doesn’t have a wedding ring!” Sunny argued.
Finally, you decided to go with, “He’s seeing someone.” At the way the girl’s face immediately fell, you awkwardly added, “Sorry, Sunny…”
Tsuki wrapped an arm around her shoulders as Sunny mumbled, “‘S fine, he wasn’t even that cute.”
“Yeah, that’s right,” her friend murmured supportively, patting her on the head. Tsuki looked up at you with a knowing smile. “I think we’re going to get another drink. Thanks for hanging out with us, Y/N.”
“You’re really fucking cool,” Sunny sighed, squeezing your hand as she let Tsuki guide her away.
Skimming your eyes over the crowd, you made eye contact with Kun again, still monitoring the room. You slid off your stool at the bar and shouldered your way through the crowd until you could sidle right up next to him. Leaning back against the wall, you propped up one foot, taking another sip of your drink and watching the crowd too.
“Found Yangyang snooping through the office earlier,” you informed him.
Kun groaned, letting his head drop back against the concrete wall with a thunk. “Do I need to check my chair for thumbtacks now or some shit?”
“That’s what I thought too, but you’re safe until April Fools.”
“So what was he doing today?”
“Looking for proof that you’re seeing someone.”
“And did he find any?”
“Nope. Well, technically yes, since I was in there, but he didn’t realize it,” you said with a grin. “He recruited me to try to covertly get information about it from you.”
“Kid’s a fucking idiot.”
“Not completely, the reasons he gave as to why he thinks you’re seeing someone were pretty observant.”
“Oh yeah?”
“Let’s see… Hickeys, you’ve been late to work, had a mysterious person bring you food, and are apparently smiling at your phone and humming.” You listed them off on the fingers of one hand. “I think if he doesn’t find proof of you seeing someone, Yang is going to start doomsday prepping.”
He rolled his eyes. “He needs a hobby.”
“Maybe he should take up crochet or something.”
“Anything to keep him out of my business.” Kun crossed his arms over his chest. “Is everything okay with those regulars you were talking to?”
“Sunny and Tsuki?” You tried to find them in the crowd, spotting them sitting in stools that they had scooted together at the bar, Sunny already looking much livelier again. “Yeah, I think she’ll be fine.”
“Good. What was it? Too much to drink?”
“Probably a little of that.” You leaned in towards him, your shoulder pressing against his as you lowered your voice, “She asked me if you were single.”
“Wait, really?” Puffs of air washed over your cheek as he chuckled.
“What are you laughing about?”
“Sorry—What did you say?” There was still a curl of humor in his tone.
“I said you were seeing someone.” You squinted at him as he started laughing again. “What?”
“Not laughing at you, baby, sorry,” he said through chuckles, his hand that was closer to the wall sneaking under your jacket and pulling you closer by the hip. “Just thinking about how many guys have asked me or the other staff about you. It’s kinda funny that it happened to you.”
“Oh? And what did you tell them?”
“That it’s against our policy to give out private information on our talent, of course.”
“Ooh, how professional,” you teased, biting on your straw.
“I am nothing if not a professional,” he smiled, thumb running over the skin just above your waistband.
You checked the time. “Only half an hour left.”
“Counting the minutes, pretty girl?”
“Until I’ve got you all to myself? Shamelessly.”
“Me too.” He looked at his watch. “Twenty-nine minutes.”
You let out a melodramatic sigh, looking around at where the other venue staff were. There was no line at the merch counter, Ten scrolling on his phone with his feet kicked up. “I’m going to go bother Ten for a bit. I’m afraid this drink is starting to taste like I should kiss you stupid right now.”
Kun tightened his hold on your hip, reaching for your drink. “Can I?”
You let him take the half-empty glass. He shook it first, the ice cubes clinking around, then he drank from the rim. A small sip, then another one. He tilted his head back and forth, humming thoughtfully before nodding, “You’re right. It does taste like that.”
That was all the permission you needed, grabbing his face with two hands and eagerly connecting your lips. He still tasted like your slightly sweet drink, and you greedily took kiss after kiss, biting down on his bottom lip. Kun groaned softly into your mouth, letting his thumb dip below your waistband then back up. Your head was spinning as your blood roared in your ears and you wished he’d just drop the fucking drink to have both hands on you, shattered glass and spilled alcohol be damned.
To his credit, he didn’t drop the glass, even when you suddenly pushed him back against the wall, kissing the column of his throat instead. When you lightly bit at an unmarred spot, he hissed and laughed, pinching your side.
“You were serious about that vampire thing, huh?” He teased. “Menace.”
“Who, me?” You asked innocently, taking the drink back and finishing it off.
He chuckled, using two hands on your hips to turn the two of you around, pressing you back against the wall now. Your free hand bunched the fabric of the front of his shirt, pulling his mouth to yours again. Kun had just grabbed your chin with one hand, tongue entwining with yours, when you felt him suddenly turn away from you. You instinctually whined at the loss, trying to pull at his shoulder as your eyes fluttered open, pout already forming on your kiss-swollen lips.
“—just can’t play grab-ass here, guys.” You caught the tail-end of what Yangyang was saying as he seemed to be giving some pre-rehearsed spiel, his eyes squeezed closed as he talked. Once he was finished, he opened his eyes, immediately jumping back as he registered who exactly he was talking to, “Jesus Christ! Ahh! What the hell?! What the fuck?!”
“Shut up.” Kun scowled at him.
“No?!” Yangyang replied indignantly. “What are you doing?!”
“Telling you to shut up.”
“Y/N!” The sound tech looked at you next, horrified. “You really want to do this?”
“Excuse me?” Kun snorted.
“Kun, come on dude, you’re better than this—”
“Excuse me?!” You pushed past Kun, fully intending on giving Yangyang a shiner.
Kun held you back, but you could tell that he was getting pissed too. “Yangyang, what exactly do you think is going on?”
“You’re cheating on your new girl with Y/N!” Yangyang gestured wildly. “Y/N, I totally thought you were a girl’s girl, by the way—”
“Shut up!” Kun yelled, loud enough that a few patrons even looked over. He glared at his employee, “You’re an idiot. I’m not cheating on anybody with Y/N.”
His face screwed up with confusion. “So you’re not seeing anybody? Then what was all—”
“It’s me!” You finally blurted out. “He’s seeing me! We’re seeing each other! Fucking Christ, Yang, you saw us making out and can’t process that?”
Yangyang blinked at you. “But he’s so… old?”
This time you had to grab Kun’s arm to keep him from doing something, and the sound tech skittered back a couple more steps.
“Go away, Yangyang,” Kun demanded sharply.
“God, can’t believe the couple Ten asked me to break up was you guys,” he shuddered, walking off.
You and Kun exchanged a knowing look. “Definitely not a coincidence…” You scoffed.
Looking back to the merch counter, you saw Ten wiping tears from his undereye, still laughing as he held onto the counter for stability.
“Does Ten have a car?” You asked.
“Yes, why?”
“I want to key it.”
Kun laughed, wrapping an arm around your waist and resting his chin on your shoulder. “As fun as that would be, how about I schedule him and Yangyang for back-to-back closing-opening shifts for a full week next month instead?”
“Oh, boo.” You let out a huff, leaning back against him affectionately. “Vandalism and property damage would’ve been so cathartic.”
He kissed your cheek apologetically. “I know, baby, I’m sorry.”
You were gently pulled out of sleep by a quiet tune and fingertips skimming over your forearm. Yawning, you squinted an eye open, watching Kun’s fingers trace the lines of your tattoos. With your mind still foggy with sleep, you listened to what he was humming.
“Hey…” You mumbled, shifting onto your back.
“Hey,” he repeated humorously, pressing a soft kiss to your temple.
“You were humming it again.” You rubbed your eye.
“Did I wake you up? Sorry.”
“No, it’s fine. That song…” You frowned. “It’s not from somewhere?”
“I don’t think so.”
“Hm.” You repeated the tune, your throat a little scratchy this early in the morning. “It’s nice.”
“You think?”
Rolling over, you buried your face in the crook of his neck. “Mhm.”
Kun rested a hand on your back. “Your phone was going off, by the way. You were still sleeping, I put it on silent, hope you don’t mind.”
You let out a big sigh, blindly reaching out towards the nightstand where your phone was. He grabbed it for you, placing it in your seeking hand. Turning your head just enough to see your phone screen, you saw three missed calls from Mark and a text.
“He better be dead,” you groaned. “Or I’m going to kill him.”
Opening the text, you saw that it was only one word, and from around two a.m., several hours before the phone calls.
[mark: KUN????????????????????????????]
[you: wrong number?]
You decided that you’d call him back if he didn’t text back in ten minutes.
That determination was useless, however, as he almost immediately called you. You declined it, texting him instead.
[you: DUDE are you fucking dying or something??]
[mark: the axe murderer is KUN????????]
[you: did yangyang text the whole venue gc or smth???]
[you: also he’s not an axe murderer jfc]
Another incoming call, which you once again declined.
[you: im going to block you if you keep calling me]
[mark: ARE YOU WITH HIM RN?!!!!?!??!?!?!]
[you: girl where tf else would i be? i told you i wasn’t coming home]
[mark: ok i did a few calming breaths]
[mark: idk what ur talking abt w yangyang but we figured it out at pizza last night. chenle saw ur FRESH HICKEY AFTER COMING OUT OF KUNS OFFICE]
[you: i hate to sound like my parents rn but maybe u guys actually should get real jobs and leave me tf alone]
[you: average unemployed friend behavior tbh]
[mark: bro the call is coming from inside the unemployment office??]
[you: actually it’s coming from kun’s bed rn xx]
Finally, your phone was silent, and you harshly dropped it back onto the nightstand. You only had a few moments of peace before a different ringer was going off. Letting out a guttural groan, you smushed your face into your pillow as Kun reached over you to grab his phone.
“Morning, Mark,” he answered, sounding very amused.
Your head snapped up automatically, eyes going wide with fear at whatever the hell your friend was saying. Kun rested one of his hands behind his head as he leaned back against his headboard, listening with interest.
“Oh, I thought you had a question about work,” he said with a grin. “You know, it’s against our policy to give out private information about our talent.”
You covered your face with your hands, shaking your head.
“Mhm, see you, Mark.”
As Kun set his phone back down, you lamented into your palms, “So much for keeping it private at first.”
“Yeah, I think we forfeited that last night,” he reminded you, pressing a kiss to your shoulder.
You took your face out of your hands to properly argue. “Not my fault you looked like that.”
“I thought it was the drink?”
“Mm, both.”
He chuckled. “Anyway, did I mention that I’m off today?”
“All day?” You looked at him hopefully.
“All day,” he confirmed. “I don’t have to be back at the venue until tomorrow night.”
“We’re practicing our Retro Rewind set later, but other than that, I’m free today too.” You beamed. “Can we go somewhere?”
“Somewhere?”
You shrugged. “I don’t know. Somewhere other than the venue or your apartment.”
“I do have some errands to run…” Kun mused. “Groceries, the laundromat, I have a package to drop off at the post office—”
“No, I mean like a real date!”
“There we go, just wanted you to use your words, baby,” he snickered, pinching your bottom lip. “You’re pouting.”
“You’re being mean to me.” You rolled onto your back, your elbows getting tired from propping up your head for that long.
“Aw, I’m sorry.” He leaned down to kiss you. “Get dressed, I know where to take you.”
You narrowed your eyes. “Not the grocery store, laundromat, or post office?”
“A real date, I promise.”
The destination Kun had in mind was apparently within walking distance, as the two of you took off down the sidewalks hand-in-hand.
“So what’s your day job?” He asked.
You weren’t expecting that. “What?”
“What do you do when you’re not doing music? You know, to pay rent and stuff?”
“Oh, I work with a temp agency and a babysitting agency. Picking up gigs here and there, you know?”
He almost seemed amused. “Really?”
“Yeah.” You touched your nose jewelry habitually. “I know I don’t look like your average office worker or childcare professional, but I clean up good, okay? Take out the nose ring and eyebrow piercing, put on some longsleeves, they never know. That’s why I don’t dye my hair crazy colors.”
“What sort of places have you temped at?”
“Lots of different places.” You hummed as you thought through a brief list of the various businesses that you’d worked at. “I usually do their filing, answer phones, that kind of stuff. I’m really only there for a few weeks at a time. I think the longest place I worked at was for… three or four months? That was actually at a music studio, so it was pretty cool.”
“Meet anybody cool?”
“There were some big names that came through. I got everyone’s coffee.” You shook your head, then looked at Kun curiously. “Have you ever thought about working somewhere other than the venue?”
“Oh, plenty of times,” he sighed. His face turned contemplative as he went on to admit, “I didn’t tell you the whole truth before. I tried to get back into songwriting and composing dozens of times over the years. I tried everything, every process out there, every tip and trick I could find—nothing. I couldn’t even remix our old tracks into something palatable. The staff at the venue only know I used to play the keyboard because when I finally gave up, I sold mine to Dejun.”
You couldn’t help the frown on your face when he described the creative block he had faced. “When was that?”
“Three, maybe four years ago now?” He seemed much less perturbed by it than you, like he had long accepted his fate. “I like working at the venue because I like being in the scene, even if I can’t contribute anything new to it.”
“That tune that you’ve been humming—”
“—Is not going to go anywhere. That happened before. I would think I had something, but as soon as I sat down to write, nothing,” he insisted calmly. “It’s fine.”
“So you just… got rid of everything?”
“It’s not like I denounced music forever,” he chuckled, squeezing your hand. “Just changed my focus.”
You thought about your own band, about all the half-written songs in your notes that you were working on, the demos you had recorded on your phone that you hoped to release someday. Would you let it all go one day too?
“We’re here,” Kun announced, gesturing to the business you had found yourself in front of.
“Mini golf?” You strained to read the faded sign.
“Unless it’s not good enough. I mean, I’ve got a long list of things that aren’t the post office…”
“No, Kun, this is perfect,” you laughed. “Let’s do it.”
“Great.” He smiled, pecking your cheek before grabbing the front door for you.
Tonight was Retro Rewind, and the venue was abuzz with excitement. Doing this Again! was opening, and you were on stage waiting for the rest of your band to join you for your soundcheck. The staff were all bustling around getting set up, and you were at your keyboard, absorbed in your own world as you played around with a tune that had been stuck in your head.
Kun slowed to a stop in front of you, taking his headset off to listen with fascination. “That’s…”
“The tune you were humming. Plus some other stuff,” you confirmed, pausing your playing for the moment. “I figured since you weren’t going to do anything with it… I started messing around with it.” You jerked your head for him to join you. “C’mere.”
He obliged, hopping up on stage and letting you drag him behind your keyboard with you as you explained your idea. “I think it’ll be better layered. Can you play it an octave down?”
To your relief and delight, he didn’t argue, hands immediately finding familiar places on the keys to your left. As both of you started playing, you listened carefully.
“Mm… A step down?” You requested, and he immediately complied. You grinned. “Hell yeah.”
“And then it’s…” He trailed off as he followed your lead into the part that you had added onto his tune, playing it entirely by ear.
“Mhm, and then I was thinking you repeat and I would—”
He did as you said, repeating the melody as you added even more on top, making him absolutely beam. “Alright!”
“But then I get stuck there.” You frowned and took your hands off the keys. “On the bridge.”
“That little flair you had going…” Kun said carefully. “If you slowed it down, and dropped it a full octave…” He played a portion of your part again on his half of the keyboard exactly as he had described. “Could be something.”
“Play it again?”
“Mm?” He made an indicative noise as he went to do so.
You listened and contemplated it, slowly nodding. “Yeah, I liked that. Really moody.”
“You got any lyrics yet?”
“Nah, just messin’ with it.” You started from the beginning again. “If that’s alright with you. I was planning on having more to show you when I asked your permission to make a real song with your tune.”
Kun blinked at you, his hands sliding off the keys and hanging by his sides as he stared at you with wonder. “You really… want to?”
“Yeah, of course.” Your head bounced to the beat as you skipped to the moody bridge that he had just suggested. “I really like this, the more I hear it. That was a good—ack!”
Discordant notes rang out as Kun had surprised you by throwing his arms around you. You took a step back to stay upright, wrapping your arms around him too, rubbing his back.
“Uh, hi?” You murmured uncertainly.
“Yes, you have my permission. I-I’d be over the moon.” He cupped your cheeks, eyes sparkling as he looked at you. “God, you’re so perfect, baby.”
You let out a sputtering laugh, ducking your head as your face heated up from his adoring gaze. “Kun, fucking hell, you’ve got to warn me.”
“You never warn me.”
“Before doing what?”
“This.”
“Eh?!” You made an indignant noise, looking around at your general demeanor. “What am I doing? Breathing?��
“Pretty much, yeah.”
“Okay, I can’t warn you every time I breathe.”
He snickered, giving you a quick peck. You huffed, immediately leaning back in for another, longer kiss, hooking one arm around his neck.
Giving a final wave to the audience, you ran off the stage arm-in-arm with Jungwoo, laughing and grinning madly. Your bandmates all followed, hugging and cheering. You all couldn’t take up space there for too long though as the next act got ready to go on. You hastily gave Roses for Eyes your best before heading further backstage. Chenle, Jungwoo, and Mark packed up their instruments and idly chatted with a couple of the acts that were hanging out in the cramped space. Everybody was sharing what instruments they could, meaning that the drumset and keyboard were staying onstage, which made yours and Jisung’s lives a bit easier.
“We’re gonna go catch some of Roses’ set,” Mark announced to the room in general, tapping your arm in a silent indication for you to join the rest of them. A few of the other performers who wouldn’t be going on until later got up as well, and you fell into the group too.
When you got backstage, however, your eyes were habitually searching for someone, and you quietly slipped away. The office door was thrown open as soon as you got to it, and a breathless smile came to Kun’s face when he saw you.
“Hey, I wanted to catch you when you came off stage, but there were way too many people.” He pecked your forehead. “You did so good, baby.”
“Thanks.” You kissed him on the lips. “Do you have time to watch RFE’s set? Or—”
“Hey, sorry.” Ten’s head poked around the corner into the hallway. He pointed over his shoulder into the main room. “Uh, these guys are saying they know you?”
Kun offered you an apologetic look, stepping past you down the hall. “Sorry, everyone says they know the manager. I’ll be—”
“Not you.”
With Ten’s gaze focused on you, you pointed to yourself in surprise. “Me?”
He nodded. You exchanged a confused glance with Kun, but as soon as you saw one of their heads poking over Ten’s shoulder, your jaw dropped.
“Nono, it’s fine, Ten,” you informed him hastily. He stepped aside to let the gaggle of men in.
Kun was possibly even more baffled than you. “What are you guys doing here?”
“We were invited,” Yuta informed him with a wide grin, gesturing to you.
“Oh my god, I didn’t think you’d actually come!” You bounced up and down with excitement, hugging him, then Taeyong, who was still in his kindly teacher attire.
Taeyong directed your attention to a figure at the back of the group. “We brought somebody.”
The man went to introduce himself, “Hey, I’m—”
“Jaehyun! Ah, sorry!” You slapped a hand over your mouth, thoroughly embarrassed.
“They said you might do that.” Jaehyun smirked, offering you a hand to shake. “It’s really nice to meet you, Y/N. You were awesome up there.”
“Thank you. It’s so cool to meet you.”
“Good to see you again, Y/N.” Johnny squeezed past Jaehyun to wrap you in a bearhug.
“Johnny! Hey!” Your greeting turned in a squeal of surprise as he lifted you off the ground. “Woah!”
Kun cleared his throat, appraising eye scanning over his former bandmates. “And uh, any particular reason I wasn’t told about this reunion?”
“We wanted to surprise you!” Taeyong explained as Johnny put you back down.
“Well, you succeeded,” Kun chuckled and crossed his arms, but you could tell that his smile didn’t reach his eyes, his gaze locked on where Johnny’s hand lingered on your back.
Giving Johnny one last friendly pat on the arm, you stepped back over to Kun’s side, eyes shining as you looked them all over. “Seriously, this is so cool. When was the last time you were all together?”
They looked at each other as they thought. Jaehyun asked, “It was probably for Juju’s birthday, right?” There were murmurs of agreement, and Jaehyun gave you a firm nod. “So, yeah, a couple months ago for my daughter’s fifth.”
“We’re going out after this, you guys should totally come!” You offered.
“Oh, your band?” Yuta surmised.
“The home team; us, Roses, some of the crew…” You trailed off, your eyes widening as soon as you realized your mistake. You winced as you turned to Kun, “Sorry, is that gonna be okay? I wasn’t thinking—”
“It’s fine,” he reassured you, wrapping an arm around your waist and pulling you closer. “They all need something new to talk about anyway.”
The others exchanged a knowing look, Yuta pointing at Kun with a smile. “Mystery guy, I presume?”
“Wh—Ugh, you seriously remember that?” You groaned as Taeyong giggled behind his hand.
Kun glanced between the three of you, confusion apparent. “What?”
“When Mark and I went to his shop, Mark was freaking out about the ‘mystery guy’ I was seeing,” you explained. “I can’t believe you guys remember that.”
“You two were funny.” Yuta shrugged.
“Anyway, I think Roses for Eyes started their set,” Johnny cut in. “The drummer is one of my clients and I told him I would watch.”
Everyone acquiesced, starting to filter out of the cramped hallway and back to the main floor. You laced your fingers with Kun’s, making sure to not lose him in the crowd. He squeezed your hand back, following your lead.
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